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kirayng
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21 Jun 2013, 1:35 pm

I'm so busy working full-time, a physical job that exerts me that way too.... also I don't make a lot of money so I have to "juggle" my bills around (nightmare itself)... I'm fully loaded, to the max, no more reserve energy for anything; so, with this in mind, I have begun to see things like, visiting my parents, as more "chores" or "things I have to do" Because it's ALL THINGS I HAVE TO DO! There is so little me time right now that I can count the hours in a week on one hand. Yeah, starting to really want to hide, and I keep having these times at work or with my husband or on an outing that I'm not enjoying myself at all, just keep thinking about how much I have to get done or figure out by a certain time-- ALL THE TIME.

So, asking people here, do you find yourselves ever putting important people on your "to-do list" because you can't switch gears to "having fun" from "doing @(%&$#%crazy amount of work"!? It's causing some hurt feelings and I wish terribly to stop, but I have two modes, work and play... I try to play while I work and work while I play but it doesn't work out very well at all. Also scheduling me time seems selfish... I take an extra 5 or 10 minutes in my car here or there or maybe try to hurry to finish my work early to have an hour before I see my husband after he gets out of work.

Can anyone relate to this? I end up with lots of frustration and negative emotions; further pushing people away when I don't want to.



1401b
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21 Jun 2013, 7:36 pm

Yes and Absolutely.


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CapriciousAgent
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22 Jun 2013, 11:13 am

If you switched your screen name with mine, and I saw this, I would wonder when I wrote it. Well, I guess I'd also wonder when I took on a husband, but otherwise, yes, I can certainly relate.



1401b
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22 Jun 2013, 3:55 pm

CapriciousAgent wrote:
If you switched your screen name with mine, and I saw this, I would wonder when I wrote it. Well, I guess I'd also wonder when I took on a husband, but otherwise, yes, I can certainly relate.

LOL


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Tomas73
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22 Jun 2013, 7:52 pm

Wow, yeah - ' definately relate to that.

Stealing time for myself is often tainted with guilt. Always feel like I should be on the case, trying to take control of responsibilities.

I think we need quality time to ourselves, not just a bit here and there.



kirayng
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23 Jun 2013, 5:08 pm

Tomas73 wrote:
Wow, yeah - ' definately relate to that.

Stealing time for myself is often tainted with guilt. Always feel like I should be on the case, trying to take control of responsibilities.

I think we need quality time to ourselves, not just a bit here and there.


Indeed.

Glad to read you all can relate. :)



Adamantium
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24 Jun 2013, 1:26 pm

kirayng wrote:
'm fully loaded, to the max, no more reserve energy for anything; so, with this in mind, I have begun to see things like, visiting my parents, as more "chores" or "things I have to do" Because it's ALL THINGS I HAVE TO DO!


Absolutely. I have been working on a large project for the last month and those "fun social things" on the weekend would take energy I just don't have. My wife has a hard time understanding this. I think she gets more energy from those things. These are the times when if I actually have some free time, I need quiet time without the demands of people.



torquemada
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25 Jun 2013, 12:06 pm

kirayng wrote:
I'm so busy working full-time, a physical job that exerts me that way too.... also I don't make a lot of money so I have to "juggle" my bills around (nightmare itself)... I'm fully loaded, to the max, no more reserve energy for anything; so, with this in mind, I have begun to see things like, visiting my parents, as more "chores" or "things I have to do" Because it's ALL THINGS I HAVE TO DO! There is so little me time right now that I can count the hours in a week on one hand. Yeah, starting to really want to hide, and I keep having these times at work or with my husband or on an outing that I'm not enjoying myself at all, just keep thinking about how much I have to get done or figure out by a certain time-- ALL THE TIME.

So, asking people here, do you find yourselves ever putting important people on your "to-do list" because you can't switch gears to "having fun" from "doing @(%&$#%crazy amount of work"!? It's causing some hurt feelings and I wish terribly to stop, but I have two modes, work and play... I try to play while I work and work while I play but it doesn't work out very well at all. Also scheduling me time seems selfish... I take an extra 5 or 10 minutes in my car here or there or maybe try to hurry to finish my work early to have an hour before I see my husband after he gets out of work.

Can anyone relate to this? I end up with lots of frustration and negative emotions; further pushing people away when I don't want to.


Yes. Absolutely relate. Currently making drastic changes due to burnout contributed to by exactly this kind of scenario. Take care of yourself.


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Mindsigh
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26 Jun 2013, 11:31 am

Yes. Even my own child is a chore. I clock-watch and count down the hours until his bedtime, which is terrible.


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mikassyna
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26 Jun 2013, 12:43 pm

Mindsigh wrote:
Yes. Even my own child is a chore. I clock-watch and count down the hours until his bedtime, which is terrible.


Wow. I'm so glad to find I'm not the only one guilty of this. (sorry)



Jensen
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18 Jul 2013, 3:55 am

How do I delete this?


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Last edited by Jensen on 19 Jul 2013, 1:22 am, edited 2 times in total.

Jensen
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18 Jul 2013, 3:59 am

Yes, I can, - absolutely, - even at reduced work time, - and it makes me feel like a creep.


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Last edited by Jensen on 19 Jul 2013, 1:21 am, edited 1 time in total.

blueroses
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18 Jul 2013, 5:23 pm

Yes, I can relate to this, too. In my case, I think working in social services and dealing with people and their problems all day doesn't help. When I get off work, I just want quiet and to rest, but it's often really hard to let go of what I dealt with at work that day enough to allow myself to recharge and relax, if that makes sense.



hurtloam
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31 Jul 2013, 4:58 pm

I feel really bad because I have a quiet life and get alot of me time, but even then, visiting people is things I have to do. I went to a party out of obligation the other week and spent the whole time wishing I could be at home enjoying myself, but being with people is a thing I have to do. Visiting family is a thing I have to do. When I don't make time for them I feel guilty. More so now I see how busy other people are.