so i've just found out I could have asperger's- what now?

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While I haven't had an official diagnosis, and still don't know if I want that or not yet, after reading about it it does feel right and a professional has agreed it sounds plausible. I am 17 and really don't know what to do from here. So with that in mind, what sort of resources are good to gain information/help with coping etc.

And individually, what sort of things do you do that you previously thought were normal? Because I keep reading things on this forum and having minor epiphanies, like 'oh! that's why i do those things! They aren't personality quirks at all!'

Thank you for any help you can give me!

Likely enter a stage of depression brought on by a series of negativity brought on by this site.

Honestly just keep in mind nothing has changed since before, your still you, you've just found a word with which better to describe yourself.

What now?

Obtain an official diagnosis from an appropriately trained and licensed mental-health professional.

Then see if you can get disability compensation and/or benefits from the government.

Do this.



Don't do this. At least, unless you are horribly depressed, utterly friendless, totally not coping, and failing in school.

Try, very hard, to go out and make a life for yourself without the government's "help" before you get an official diagnosis and apply for disability.

Labels and attitudes can be (not always are, but definitely can be) more disabling than conditions.

Read lots of books. Tony Attwood is good-- and he will give you a language with which to talk to professionals.

Read books that were written BY Aspies, FOR Aspies. Jennifer McIllwe Myers is very good. John Elder Robison is very good. Dr. Temple Grandin is, of course, very famous and very good-- but please keep in mind that she belongs to an older generation for whom total conformity was not merely the path of least resistance, but simply the only option. Rudy Simone is very good-- if you are as female as your avatar appears, she has the advantage of writing much of the time exclusively for Aspie females. There is a book called Women From Another Planet that I found very relatable, if not necessarily helpful.

Avoid Maxine Aston like the plague, unless your goal is to use self-hatred to motivate yourself to become as good an imitation-neurotypical as possible regardless of how downtrodden you become in the process.

I just discovered this about myself as well. What I have done is to back up and take a look at things from a new perspective. I used to force myself into social situations and walk out, sometimes run out, because I was so overwhelmed. My new approach for social situations is to not expect myself to handle them, show up early, and leave when things get overwhelming. I am looking at all the stupid things that I have blown up over, and deciding to avoid all together, or approach differently.

Gen-X'ers ...

Do you also advocate not going to a doctor when someone has explosive diarrhea, projectile vomiting, and a body temperature of 105°F?

It's better to know and receive helpful treatment than to not know and receive harmful treatment or not treatment at all.

I think they were talking about getting disability compensation and/or benefits from the government as the "don't do". I would fully agree with them on that.

go get the diagnosis from a proper mental-health professional, but don't look to the govt to help you out unless you have no other options. Many in the Spectrum can be productive members of society when it comes to the work force. If you are unable to in that part of society, then get the help needed, but solely relying on the gov't to help you because you have a label is beyond my comprehension.

Stoek- My experience has been positive so far, so hopefully it'll stay that way!

BuyerBeware- I love reading so I'll definitely get on those! I've been wondering specifically about female experience differs from male so I think I'll start with Rudy Simone. Thank you

FallingDownMan- It is weird looking at things in my childhood and realising the reason behind these different behaviours and events! Reminding myself that people won't mind if I don't stay the entire time for social events is definitely something I need to do, forcing myself never leads anywhere good.

In regards to diagnosis; obviously opinions differ but right now it wouldn't really be feasible anyway. I don't feel comfortable with my current doctor at all, and have had issues with him being completely unhelpful with different things in the past, but I am moving in a month so hopefully I'll find a better/more understanding doctor then.

Thank you for your help!

I also recommend John Elder Robison's books too.

he used to be a member on here,am not surprised he isnt any more he is like a celebrity for his books here now.

Definitely don't worry too much about it. I just found out a year and a half ago. I don't have an official medical diagnosis but I know people who work in the field and they pointed it out to me and I self diagnosed from there. So I am pretty sure I don't need to bother with a medical diagnosis. I think the best advice I can give you is to embrace it. There are many challenges about being on the Spectrum for sure but there are beautiful things as well. How we see beautiful colors and hear lots of sounds, I love being able to hear nature sounds that escape others. Some of the things that cause challenges for us are also some of the wonderful things as well. Don't ever think of this a curse or a bad thing. Every one has challenges, NT's have many as well. We just need to embrace them and take them one step at a time. If you have a meltdown, it's okay, have it and then move on from there.

And if people wonder why you are weird, embrace your weirdness. The cool thing is that now Autism and AS is so well known that if you tell someone you are on the Spectrum they will most likely totally understand and be cool with it. If they are not then they are not cool anyway. But don't be afraid of it. Allow yourself to explore your feelings and how your mind and body works. Get to know yourself and if you are having a hard day be open and honest about it. You have lots of support here and I am sure your parents will support you as well. And remember, whatever you feel, whatever question you want to ask, NOTHING is every too stupid or weird or in the case of some of us too infantile. NO ONE here will disrespect you or think badly of you if you are having a hard time or if you have a question that you might feel is weird or dumb. Everyone here has felt it at one point or another so it's all good.

It's a tough but beautiful world and we all have to live in it so enjoy and embrace everything you can about it.