lostonearth35
Veteran
Joined: 5 Jan 2010
Age: 50
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,898
Location: Lost on Earth, waddya think?
14 Jul 2015, 12:26 am
There are these two identical twins named Tom and Tim. Tim lives in a town with his wife. Tom lives near the harbor where he pretty much keeps to himself. He has a boat that he rents to people wanting to go for a ride or fishing, but the boat has gotten very old and is falling apart so one day when a group of people ask if they can rent it he tells them they shouldn't. But they insist so he gives in and lets them on the boat. Sure enough the boat falls apart completely and sinks, and Tom spends the rest of the day trying to clean up the whole mess and stuff. So he is unaware that during this same day the wife of his brother Tim, has suddenly died. Finally he goes to the grocery store in the evening to buy some food. A little old lady notices him and, mistaking him for his twin brother, walks right over and says, "Oh, I am so sorry for your loss!"
Tom is puzzled at first, but then thinks she's talking about the loss of his boat and not his brother's wife. So he says, "Oh, that beaten-up old thing? It's not such a big deal, really. She was a real mess anyway, leaking and falling apart and with big cracks and barnacles all over her bottom."
The old lady can't believe her ears, but Tom continues, "Today a group of young people showed up and said they'd pay me to let them ride on her. But I told they really shouldn't because she smelled like rotten fish and seaweed and was full of holes. But they wouldn't stop pestering me so I let them go on her. They rode her for only about ten minutes and then suddenly she shook all over, split herself right down the middle, and then down she went! What a mess, I spent the whole afternoon picking up parts of her, and..."
The poor old lady then fainted right there in the store. 
15 Jul 2015, 6:42 am
15 Jul 2015, 3:02 pm
19 Jul 2015, 9:30 am
