For men here that can't get women

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Stop overthinking the whole situation.

There's no way to think yourself out of this situation. You can improve on a few things, but women aren't logical at all so trying to figure them out won't yield results. There are a few laws that men need to Abide by in order to have a girlfriend.. If you are fishing for an NT woman at least.

You must have a decent job
You must drive a decent car
You must be as attractive physically or more than the woman you like

These 3 laws are universal. The rest is up to you. You need to find your niche and what type of women are attracted to you. You can't be too picky. If you're here on the internet looking for solutions than you can't be picky.

i'm close to normal weight and my husband is very overweight. so, i think your "looks" rule is off some. also, i'm a social worker, so i know lots of disabled folks. they tend to date each other. so, no, job, no car, is not a deal-breaker if you're looking for someone in a similar situation.

I have seen unemployed losers who had good looking girlfriends. So those things aren't always true. Some women will even date men who are child abusers.

Inaccurate negative generalization #8,908.

Thanks.

You are wrong and I can assure you that women are logical enough not to choose a man for his job or for his car. Every woman is different and is looking for different things, except for the basics of course (respect, minimal hygiene, etc.)

Not sure if that is accurate. But at least having a plan for your life and going for it is what got me my gf. Doesn't care if I fail, just cares that I tried and did my best.

I call nonsense on the universal laws.

I don't have a job, haven't worked for three years to due illness and some difficult family circumstances.
I don't drive or own a car, nor do I want to.

Sure, these things might be desirable and necessary to maintain a certain standard of living, but it's quite possible to 'get' women without them. I might not be married or have legions of groupies, but at least I can be reassured that I'm not seen as a meal ticket, and that the women who's company I've enjoyed have been attracted to me for who I am as a person.

Either that or I'm especially gorgeous... or they're especially desperate.

Another wrong post.

That logic isn't logical at all.

As someone already stated in here, even losers can get girlfriends.

I've seen guys with no job, no car, or who have lost their licence to drive with hot girlfriends. It depends what kind of vibe you give off, and what sort of personality you have, and what sort of person you go for.

The Squid feels the sexism dripping from the original poster, is enough to swim in. Horrible.

I'm employed, have the whole usual independent adult life with child, have car, more education than is good for anyone, the works.

My last boyfriend was unemployed and didn't drive. Admittedly, he's better looking than I am, but that's mostly because he's had the freedom to sleep 8-10 hours a day, and I've been sleep-deprived and overworked for a decade. I'm in better physical shape than he is, though.

I'm trying to remember the last time I dated a guy on the basis of his job or car. Um...that'd be never. And while there's been a serious uptick in the looks department since I got divorced, it was all downhill after my first college boyfriend (who still, as it turns out, is a very handsome man).

Ready to toss that bucket of horses**t yet?

I'm 5'10" and almost 150lbs (So, I weigh a bit less than average for my height). As far as hoe good looking I am, I figure that I'm about average. I'm a student and I get around either by foot or bicycle (though my bike has a bent rim at the moment and the only bike shop within ten miles of here just closed down so I have no idea where I'm going to get a spoke wrench unless I buy it online which I'd really rather not). Over the course of my life, I've never made any kind of romantic advances, but three girls have explicitly stated their desire to be in some form of romantic relationship with me (though two of them seriously scared me & I accepted only because I thought they'd do something to hurt me if I declined. Those relationships ended pretty poorly...) and my sister (who I go to for social advice) has told me that some girls have given me hints that they were interested.

My problem is that the girls I am interested in rarely feel the same way about me...

Clearly the OP is only thinking about the most shallow women out there. Sure there are SOME women who those would be rules to, but they're far and away in the minority and they aren't the kinds you should be looking for anyways

What the Squid finds interesting, is that we have read many testimonials from individuals on this site, claiming they do not have the energy or stress tolerance to work, drive or socially interact. Many people here say it "Wears them out" and they don't have the energy. We suspect the same people making these claims, are also generating a fuss about their lack of luck in the dating game. Be it a man or a woman, you need the energy and focus to GIVE them. We feel that if you are having a hard time with more basic issues, a relationship should be your last concern.

This is true in my area. not saying about women in general , or other areas, based on what I've seen/experienced, from profiles/adds on okc, pof, and craigslist. again in my area.

Is that enough clarification to not be seen as sexist?

"I have a car, house, good paying job and my stuff together. Any man wanting to date me must have all that at least "

I can't help but feel depressed and wish I could get to the areas where the women you all talk about live or have the skill set needed to find them here and ask them out.

Ding ding ding. I enjoy very much, by the way, the Squid's alternating third-person and first-person-plural self-reference.

Most ev'ybody wants somebody, though, and if you haven't energy to get out and do and give, and that's chronic, it does feel a bit like you're being walloped by life's baseball bat daily after a while, and like someone ought to give you a freaking break and just show up and be the extremely part-time lover. It just doesn't happen very often.

I used to fantasize about a perfect romance life in which I had a (dashing) man stashed in each of several highly visitable cities. Each man was terribly busy with his career, also either faithful or discreet, and madly in love with me. Whenever I needed a break, off I'd go to one of these cities for a wonderful romantic interlude, and never pay for a hotel. Didn't actually happen, much, but it's just as well.

What's up with that?