I met a girl, through playing league of legends 2 years ago and we became good friends. Talking to each other all day and falling asleep to each other on Skype. We eventually started dating LDR (we live in different countries). She really liked me and I was hesitant to start a relationship, especially long distance. I did eventually ask her out and things were great for a few months and then we began having ups and downs and would break up almost monthly and get back together the next day, this happened a few times before we ended it for good. We connected mainly over league of legends, and I changed to a different game server in my country, to make the game much more enjoyable (much lower ping). We still watched movies and anime together and talked.
We had some time apart and we became friends again, I still loved her but was honestly happy with just being her friend, we still spent a lot of time together. She eventually started dating someone else, this complicated things and I became jealous but we remained friends and talked often. We slowly started talking less and less. I have still thought about her every day since I met her, and I started to get a bit depressed, unrelated to her just the stresses of life. I became distant to her, and would only type to her minimally, and stopped talking to her, preferring to be alone, I did have friends in real life that I would spend time with, but I pushed them away, whilst being depressed too. Eventually she had enough and removed me, to which I was upset but let her go.
It was about a week later, I couldn't take it anymore and tried to apologize to her and convince her to re add me. She did, but things were not the same, after the time I only typed to her, and then not contact with her at all, she had moved on and found other friends to talk to, and replaced me with someone else to spend her nights with. (not her boyfriend). After realizing how distant she was, I broke down to her, and started bawling to her, and explaining how I'm in love with her, and haven't stopped thinking about her, she said she couldn't handle this and needed to remove me from her life. at this point I contemplated suicide for the first time in a while. and was completely heartbroken.
A few days later I begged her to re add me, but now its even worse, she won't even consider spending time with me and gives me short responses to everything I type to her, so that I have to make 100% of the effort to continue the conversation. And just says 'no thank you' to my offers of watching a movie together or something, she seems very uninterested in a friendship with me, and only re added me because I convinced her I just needed her around. But I have become dependent and borderline obsessed with her, and I don't have other friends to talk to anymore as I pushed them away, and some just moved on with their lives and moved away. I think about her all day, from the moment I wake to the moment I sleep, and then I dream about her most nights too.
Without her I don't know what to do, she was one of the few people to accept me and care about me truly, but now that's gone.
tl:dr: Girlfriend turned friend, stopped caring about me, but she is all I have and the only person outside of my family I connect with. What do?
14 Jun 2014, 10:03 pm
