Driving (and Autism/Asperger's)

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I've turned 16 over 7 months ago and so have many of my peers. A good majority of them have starting to go for their learners permit and the process to one day getting their drivers' license. I would like to, but it's been an afterthought in my mind. I would like some independence in this turning chapter of life. I've kinda looked forward to driving as long as I remember. Many people have asked me if I have started driving. I am afraid that I will crash or be negligent and disappoint everyone and everything, Autism/Asperger's given as well. Do you have any experience or good tips?

Last edited by Marylandman889 on 28 Jul 2014, 4:26 am, edited 1 time in total.

I stole my parents' car at the age of twelve, and went flat out on a narrow gravel road. Everything went smooth, but I don't recommend doing that. Instead, you could try one of the many driving simulators on the market if you don't have access to a real car, or if you just want to get the basics down before getting behind the wheel of a real car. You would need a wheel and set of pedals in addition to the software, and a PC, of course.

My tip is stay to stay calm, no matter how loud the instructor is screaming at you lol.

Driving is pretty simple, press the gas a little bit and it will take off lightly, slam the gas and it will fly.

You're also going to want to learn how your car behaves in abnormal conditions e.g. slamming on the brakes, gas, turning quickly, losing traction. This way you'll have experience and know how it feels and how to respond.

god i hate driving LMAO

What usually works best for me when I have to go out and hit the road is basically just being aware of your surroundings and familiar with how your car works. Most cars work the same way - they have gears and brakes and gas pedals, all the basic stuff - but one car could have a more powerful engine and require a lighter push on the gas pedal, one could have been in an accident and the wheel alignment is slightly off, making it veer to the right, the engine belt might be loose and squeal whenever you start the car, little things like that.

IMHO, public transportation is a LOT cheaper if you can manage it.

I had my first driving lessons in a big open parking lot. My dad took me and we spent three days in that lot. The first day was not even moving the car at all, just learning to shift gears. But I imagine you will have an automatic car rather than a manual shift but you should still spend time familiarizing how to shift and how the pedals feel before you even move the car.

The second day he actually let me drive. It was an old 1973 or 1974 VW van - Red bottom, white top, no power steering, no power anything! But once I learned to drive that I could drive anything. Except the first time I drove an automatic car ten years later I nearly tore up the transmission trying to manually shift the thing! But that second day I drove up and down the parking lot getting a feel for how it all felt and worked.

The third day we worked on parking. He set up cones and crates and I had to park, front, back, using only mirrors and then parallel.

The fourth day was my actual first day on the real road. It was a quiet rode and I just got a feel for what that felt like.

The fifth day was hills, And they were not just hills. We lived in Hawaii at the time so they were HILLS! He had me sit still on a slope using just the clutch. I remember one time I had a little trouble starting on the hill and he had to get out and tell the people behind us that I was just learning. They were very understanding and smiled.

After hills we drove more in the neighborhood and then after that I started driving on the highway.

I drove a good bit with my permit afterwards and then I also took driver's ed at school. I did not pass my first driver's test though because I was so nervous and anxious that I could not focus on what I was doing. But I could still drive very well. So I just kept practicing on my permit. Then I went to college and took the bus and trains that whole school year and then when I came back home for the summer, we were back in the lower 48 then, my mom signed me up for Sears driving lessons. Of course I was a stellar student because I had been driving for a while the year before and I was able to pass my driver's test the second time with no issues.

But I think spending an enormous amount of working everything out in a safe parking lot and then starting on small quiet roads was what really helped me. I was able to drive any vehicle anywhere after that. It even gave me enough base confidence to fly planes. I don't have a pilot's license but some of my cousins are pilots and some pilot for a living so whenever they are in town we rent little planes and they let me fly them.

The only trouble I have now when I drive is sometimes at night the glare of the lights can really bother me and sometimes when I am tired or overextended I can get goofy and spacey so I have to be really careful not to drive tired. I can get exhausted from sensory input while driving as well, especially in traffic if others are playing loud music so I have to be careful about that. But I think that since my dad taught me so well and since I have been driving for over thirty years, a lot of it is second nature. My husband loves "Need For Speed" on the computer and he had me play that with him. It actually really improved my driving skills as well and it saved my life when I was on the highway going 70 miles an hour and the back driver's side wheel fell off my car because when Pop A Lock changed my tire they never tightened the lug nuts. And they refused to take any responsibility for nearly killing me and destroying the entire rear left side of my car and they refused to reimburse my insurance. Yes everyone, let me say it again, that is Pop A Lock roadside assistance. But having played "Need For Speed" had gotten my brain familiarized with an out of control car in an emergency situation and I was able to handle the car without panicking after having received a major concussion and spinal compression from the impact of the car hitting the ground, as I skidded from the far left lane across three lanes of highway onto the right shoulder and parallel park it and not go over the cliff edge. A lady stopped to help me and she told me that she had never in her life ever seen anyone handle a car that well. I told her it was mom's daily prayers for her kids sending angels to watch over me and husband's having me play Need For Speed with him. And one more time, who was responsible for that accident, which if it had happened 5 minutes later, the three tractor trailers who came barreling down the highway would not have been able to stop and the carnage would have been astronomical. Fortunately it was at night so everyone say the sparks flying and was able to slow down enough to let me skid across the highway. But yes, ladies and gentleman, one more time, Pop A Lock roadside assistance. And their excuse was that even though my spare was a full sized tire on a full sized rim they did not need to tighten the lug nuts when they put the wheel on because they had not intended to put the wheel on as a permanant and rather than just replacing my spare I should had thought to replace the full sized wheel and rim they put on. Of course they did not tell me at the time they put it on that they did not tighten the bolts. But they refused to take any responsibility and we could not afford to sue them because that would have cost us more than what we could have gotten. So Pop A Lock roadside assistance everybody. But playing driving games on the computer is a great idea especially if you have a steering wheel and pedal accessories.

Last edited by skibum on 28 Jul 2014, 8:07 am, edited 1 time in total.

If you want to drive there are no real obstacles for you to do so. The only obstacle would be lack of determination.

Asperger doesn't make you a bad driver. Just focus on the road and pay attention to signs. Learn all the rules so you know what do. You are capable of this part even more than normal people. I was the best on the rules exam of my whole 30 people group. I got maximum points, no single mistake.

You will probably have to stay focused and think what to do all the time while driving but it is OK. Our brains are used to it. For example I always think to myself "priority road ahead, make sure no car is going from there" or "very sharp turn, slow down to 20-30km/h and prepare to lower to 2nd gear". It isn't automatic to me. But I think it so fast there is really no difference.

Btw. When you start driving you might be afraid of starting the car - it can "die" so you have to turn the key again or it can go backwards if it the road is rough. It was the main problem for me. Noone teached me how to deal with it (they only told me: "to start you hit the clutch and add gas till the car starts"). But then my dad realized it is happening and he teached me a trick. You don't start with only the clutch and gas pedals. You use the brake pedal too. You start by hitting the brake and clutch. Then you slowly let go of both, brake faster than clutch. Then after a while you are going to feel the car doesn't need the brake anymore. You can move your leg from brake to gas then. And add gas slowly while still slowly letting the clutch go. You do it till the clutch is 100% up. Then you manipulate only the gas. The car will move slowly and steady, just the way you want once you learn the trick. It won't "die" or go backwards.

Last edited by Kiriae on 28 Jul 2014, 8:09 am, edited 1 time in total.

Good luck on getting your license.

Just drive calmly and slowly. Make sure you follow all the signs and lights properly. If somebody honks while you're driving slowly, disregard it. But don't drive too slowly. Drive maybe 25-30 mph on a road with the speed limit as 30 mph. If you're on the highway, drive the speed limit.

You're fortunate.

I had to wait until I was 37 to get mine.

As you get better and better and more comfortable behind the wheel, learn to drive at the speed of the flow of traffic. Some people always drive the speed limit. Even though that is a rule, if the flow of traffic is significantly faster than the speed limit, especially on a highway, you actually can cause an accident if you are driving the speed limit. These are things that you have to learn to judge and these things will come as you gain experience. If you choose to drive the speed limit than stay in the far right lane.

When I am driving on a two lane road especially, I use the left lane exclusively for passing. It is good to leave the left lane clear and open as a passing lane. Otherwise you risk clogging up traffic and that is when people get impatient and start to weave in and out at full speed and risk accidents. If you see a bunch of cars driving together taking up multiple lanes, try to stay away from that. If we drive in an organized way so that there is always a free lane for passing than that will alleviate stress for everyone on the road. And ALWAYS give big trucks the right of way. You never know where they are coming from and how tired they are. And usually they have a deadline or their pay might be cut. You also can't tell if they are fully loaded or returning empty. If they are fully loaded they are going to be very heavy and will have a difficult time going uphill but will be very fast and impossible to stop going down steep hills. So it's best to always treat them with respect and with a little bit of courtesy. I always remember too that they may be carrying my package that I ordered or that item that I need to buy so I need to let them get to wherever they are going with as much help from me as possible. And if one of them is trying to switch lanes I always give way and let him switch in front of me.

WTF??? Study online for the written permit test NOW!! ! That takes about 2 to 3 hours or less. Most of it just requires common sence. Go to the Dmv, and take the written test. you will need i.d. social security card, birth certificate. If you fail, take it again. And again, and again, until you get your permit. Drive around with your parents, or someone who is over 18. Ask to drive cars all the time. Learn to parallel park. After a week or more, whatever the state requires. Get someones legal car, and go take the driving test at the road course DMV. Or just do all the stuff through your school or something. That student driver stuff. Then get a race car, and get alot of tickets

In all seriousness, it's not like the old days when you could just slough off tickets.

If you accumulate 3 or more unpaid PARKING tickets in NYC, your car gets towed.

If you don't pay ONE moving violation ticket within 30 days, or you don't respond at all to the ticket, your license gets suspended.

I would like to know this as I don't drive yet.

I have Aspergers and I've never had a problem learning to drive. In fact. I picked up on it very quickly. I can see for some people out there that getting behind the controls of a big and powerful machine can be a little intimidating at first. but don't let that intimidation hold you back.

Same here. I just observed my father and went through the process in my mind before stealing the car (manual shift).

^^^That.

Take the time to become a good and safe driver. There are far to many people who don't taking driving seriously. All they end up doing is getting themselves into an accident sooner or later.

If you have a friend or relative with access to a back field, ask them if you can practice driving around in it. A lot of people learn how to drive that way.

I never had a problem learning to drive an automatic transmission. However, I had a much more difficult time learning to drive a manual transmission (having to coordinate both feet and both hands simultaneously).

As a note, even though I learned how to drive an automatic transmission fairly easily, I had great difficulties judging distances (perhaps this has something with depth perception?). In my first year of driving, I hit stationary objects (on both the right and left side of the car) while parking. To this day, I still have difficulty judging distances.