Do noisy neighbours drive you batty? A Rant.

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I live with a roommate but he's hardly ever here (he's starting a business and stays at his trailer to be closer to his business) He used to be a truck driver and he would be here in the afternoons trying to sleep but the neighbours are so noisy. They'd wake him up and he'd have to go trucking all night on like 2 or 3 hours of sleep. But he's NT and didn't seem fazed by the noise. I'd be alot more pizzed off than he was, that he had to go trucking for sometimes 12 hours on hardly any sleep. I would tiptoe around in here so he'd get some sleep, and the neighbours would wake him up nearly every day.

We live in a house that's two houses ajoined in the middle. The walls are thin. In terms of the house itself this is the nicest place I've ever lived in - my previous apartment I'm pretty sure had mold in it. My roommate lived below me. When I got sick with fibromyalgia/CFS we thought it was the mold and I couldn't work enough to pay the rent on my own so we split on a place now. He's divorced and alot older than I am but if it wasn't for his help I don't know where I'd be.

Anyway how do you deal with noisy neighbours? With finding out that I'm Aspie I'm discovering why other people's noise bothers me so much. The people on the other side of this house have like 4 or 5 kids and they run up and down the halls sounding like a herd of elephants. They have a nice yard and there's a huge park literally right across the street.

And then on weekends they have a whole bunch of people over in their yard and play music loud and drink. So if I'm inside I hear their kids, and if I'm outside I hear the adults partying. In the evenings I take my rabbit for a walk and I cannot hear my own thoughts with them & their music. Sometimes they've played their music loud till 3 in the morning. I wanted to call the police but I'm afraid they'll complain to my roommate and he'd not want me stirring stuff up. But don't we all have the right to reasonable enjoyment of our residences? When I was working and they'd kept me up half the night with their music, before I'd leave for work I'd put the TV on one of those Galaxy stations, crank up the volume, and bug off to work for 6 hours. 'Oh you don't like my music? I didn't like your music at 3 a.m. either, but at least I'm not breaking any noise bylaws!'

And all their kids slam the door over & over. When they have a party the adults smoke pot so they have money for that, but they can't shell out $40 for a door-closer? I have been sitting outside with a friend (on the other side of the house, so diagonal across the house, outside) and they slammed the door so hard I saw my living room window rattle and my friend was like 'what the blazes was that' and said "is someone home" - he thought it was someone in my house! Last Christmas I was so tempted to buy them a door-closer and wrap it up and leave it on their doorstep!

They slam the doors so hard they wake me up. If I had slammed doors that loud when I was little that I woke someone up, my mother would have tanned the hide off my bum. I remember my mother teaching me to close doors softly - she called it "closing the door like a lady" and it took me one day to learn it. Their kids are old enough to know how to close a door nicely - kids can learn, if something is taught.

The people in the house beside us (on the other side) run a daycare. Yes, we knew this when we moved in. But -- it's not the kids who wake me up most days, it's the woman living there. She yells at her husband and son (the son's in his teens) at the top of her voice. She drives me nuts. A couple of weeks ago she woke me up 3 times in one week. I feel sorry for her husband. How were we to know before we moved in that she's such a yeller? My bedroom window is 30 feet away. It's summertime and I cannot open my bedroom window for fresh air for fear of her waking me up with the yelling, and even with the window shut it happens. Why she can't walk her lazy a** up to her husband or son and speak quietly is beyond me. It is very uncivilized and uncouth to scream at someone at the top of your voice with other peoples' houses 30 feet away!

A couple of months ago we had a small house fire. Even *with our house on fire* I did not yell out my roommate's name at the top of my lungs the way she does every single day! (Not sure if it's an Aspie thing or what, but I am very calm in emergencies, and yet sh*t like noisy people day in & day out drives me out of my tree!)

Sometimes I either want to scream over the fence at her like a shrew and tell her to have some consideration for others around her and that not the entire world is on a dayshift schedule (when I worked I was on afternoon shift - I worked late & slept late, and I am still on that routine, it seems to be my natural sleep schedule) and that just because she's awake early in the morning it doesn't mean that everyone else around her is! Or sit out there with my CD player and play something loud enough for her to not be able to have a conversation! Yes I realize that would be lowering myself to her level but I don't want to confront her, I just want her to be quieter.

And the people next door I want to tell them to send their kids across to the da*n park! That's what it's there for! They're plenty old enough to know how to cross the street. When I was a kid I would play so quietly in the yard that my mother would have to stick her head out once in a while to be sure I was still there! She'd say 'you're so quiet', she'd be making sure I wasn't kidnapped!

So I feel like I am caught in the middle of such noise. And yes I admit sometimes when they've banged on the wall for God knows what reason I've been passive-aggressive and banged on the wall back. I don't want to do stuff like that but sometimes they're just getting on my last nerve. I feel like neither of them have much consideration for people around them.

With my not working right now (and even when I was working with my health problems making me go home early so often I still wasn't making enough money) I cannot afford to move out in my own place. My roommate has been so kind to me and helped me out so much that I hate to complain to him about this. He knows somewhat of my being bothered by noise. He is more passive about it and doesn't get bothered by it. I don't understand but he's NT and I'm not. I'm afraid if I complain to the neighbours and they complain to him he might move out himself and I certainly cannot afford the rent on my own, I'd have to find another roommate. And I'd still be stuck with the noise, and be living with someone I don't know (horrors!)

Anyway if anyone's read this far, thanks!

How do you deal with noisy neighbours?

Also post your noisy neighbour stories for me - misery loves company!

Always tried to find quiet neighborhoods.
Lived in the current one almost 4 years.
Now, about 3 houses away, new neighbors who like loud music, late, 2 and 3 nights a week.
Grrrrrrr!! !!

Yeah, just when you think you've got quiet neighbors, they move and noisy ones move in.
The forth of July is the worst.

to the south i have a hair salon with living quarters upstairs. they're not too bad, but they can get into heated debates really late at night/early morning and i can make out pretty much everything they say. an employee at the gym i go to lives there.

to the north i've got a house packed with about 20 illegal immigrants from my mothers hometown in Jalisco who throw parties about every 2 days, let their 13 year old son drive unlicensed and let their younger kids run around unsupervised and scream bloody murder well into the late hours of the night, and who recently got a surround sound home theater so you can see how that is. they seem to like DreamWorks.
i liked the old tenants better. they were quiet, and let me come over shoot hoops.

I've never really had problems with noisy neighbors, but definitely noisy housemates! Argh, the dogs my friend's family owns drive me f*****g nuts, and the stomping they do every so often on this one section of floor that gets pushed out of place is irritating too. I can also hear it when they open and close doors and walk down the (rather noisy) stairs. The last part wouldn't be as bad if I had a door on my room, but it doesn't, and I often feel my personal space is being invaded when someone comes downstairs unexpectedly. One of my friends is bad for doing this, and he always manages to frighten me when he comes over.

It was much worse though when I was at my dad's. People constantly stomping EVERYWHERE, babies crying, doors slamming, dishes clanging... sound traveled way too well in that house, and hell I even remember my half-brother's motorized swing chair making an annoying sound, that reminded me of a phone vibrating or a motor being set off from some device buried in a box. I could hear it all, as my room was right below the living room, like Grand Central f*****g Station. My stepmother's family had absolutely no respect for my sensory issues. I'm glad I don't live with them anymore, it's been over six months and I still get pissed off thinking about it.

I want to get an apartment so I don't have to worry about dogs or people busting in unexpectedly. If anyone makes enough noise when I'm in an apartment, then I'm free to file a noise complaint. Not so much here.

I have some noisy neighbours. There's the people who live next to us and they're always banging about and yelling. And their kids are always running up and down the place and screaming. They drive my mum up the wall and her solution is to literally blast music loud enough for them to hear and she'll scream through the walls to them to shut up. And they'll go quiet for some period of time until the noise starts all over again. I feel a bit bad whenever my mum does that. They're actually an amiable family and they're always nice.

Then there's the lady across the road from us who will blast music so loud that I can still feel the vibrations from inside my bedroom. She'll play it at night too and drive everyone insane. I feel most sorry for the people who live right next to her and above her though. They get the worst of it. And my 13 year old neighbour drives me insane the most though. She'll go out in the streets and scream and yell. She'll have her radio up to maximum volume in the garden which isn't fun when I'm in my garden and wanting to get some peace. Her cats used to take a dump in my tortoise's run in our garden which also frustrated me.

During my studying for my GCSE exams, I thought that I was slowly going insane.

ive been trying to change apartment for ages .. sigh .. two reasons .. difficult neighbours and too expensive rent .. i want a place without immediate neighbours!

I used to live in a place with paper walls & ceilings. One day I was visiting the lady upstairs and she introduced her toddler to me. I said that he's much bigger than I expected. When she asked why, I said, "Well yesterday when you told him to get back in his crib I thought he was younger." Her eyes went wide but I just looked at her and said nothing. Not only did they stop a lot of the noise, they moved! (They used a dozen friends, a dozen crates of beer, and they threw their sofa off the balcony!)

The best short-term remedy is earplugs, maximum strength. Nothing will eliminate noise entirely but earplugs do reduce it a lot. I find that my system "resets" so my tolerance of noise is improved.

Noise is the worst form of hell. I envy my uncle, who turns down his hearing aid at the mall.

You sound like a really nice person little blue jay. And I know exactly how you're feeling.

I've lived beside my fair share of noisy neighbours. From party animals who loved to scream and smash bottles at 3 in the morning, to bikies who loved to rev their motorbikes for 10 minutes every morning at 5am... but the worst one was when I was living on my own and a neighbour's kid was just running and smashing himself into the fence and screaming, like heavy metal screaming, Satanic screaming... and the mother would just close herself inside the house and do nothing. I could hear this kid through my earphones... but if you asked any other neighbours, they'd probably just shrug and say, "Oh well they're just kids ... they have to burn off energy I suppose. Better that than running around their poor mother's house smashing up the furniture! hahaha"

I'm of the same mind as you though, I was raised with proper lessons in appropriate behaviour and if I didn't listen, I got walloped. No questions asked, no second chances. Whack. I wish I had the Latin translation of the sentence: Through pain, one learns fast. I'd put it on a T-shirt. Because you're right, it doesn't take all that bloody long to learn how to close a door. Or learn to keep your voice down when you're at the supermarket waiting in the queue. If I yelled like there was no tomorrow, my dad would turn around, fix me with a piercing, wilting stare and ask calmly, "Why are you yelling? I'm right here. Why are you yelling?" But today you see young adults on the train and they have no idea how to even talk to each other. They think everyone else sitting on the train is privileged to be overhearing their conversation.

You sound like a really nice person little blue jay. And I know exactly how you're feeling.

I've lived beside my fair share of noisy neighbours. From party animals who loved to scream and smash bottles at 3 in the morning, to bikies who loved to rev their motorbikes for 10 minutes every morning at 5am... but the worst one was when I was living on my own and a neighbour's kid was just running and smashing himself into the fence and screaming, like heavy metal screaming, Satanic screaming... and the mother would just close herself inside the house and do nothing. I could hear this kid through my earphones... but if you asked any other neighbours, they'd probably just shrug and say, "Oh well they're just kids ... they have to burn off energy I suppose. Better that than running around their poor mother's house smashing up the furniture! hahaha"

I'm of the same mind as you though, I was raised with proper lessons in appropriate behaviour and if I didn't listen, I got walloped. No questions asked, no second chances. Whack. I wish I had the Latin translation of the sentence: Through pain, one learns fast. I'd put it on a T-shirt. Because you're right, it doesn't take all that bloody long to learn how to close a door. Or learn to keep your voice down when you're at the supermarket waiting in the queue. If I yelled like there was no tomorrow, my dad would turn around, fix me with a piercing, wilting stare and ask calmly, "Why are you yelling? I'm right here. Why are you yelling?" But today you see young adults on the train and they have no idea how to even talk to each other. They think everyone else sitting on the train is privileged to be overhearing their conversation.

This morning I was at another friend's place, just waking up some time around noon, and one of his friends came over and started blasting music really loudly in the next room over. I could've f*****g sworn it was some bigass stereo system, but it was a mere iPod dock. I was so pissed, I was ready to break that stupid thing, but I decided to play it cool and have a shutdown instead of a meltdown. I grabbed a nearby pair of headphones and tried to drown it out with a noise generator app, but it didn't work and the headphones just made my head hurt. I forgot that that only works well when you have earbuds and not headphones. I remember acting kind of surly towards my friends, but at least I didn't outwardly freak out. Inwardly though, oh boy, I was mad.

Later on, when it was just me and the one friend, I told him about this and I said that I decided to let them have their fun. He told me I was a bit rude and that I could have just told them to turn it down, though it wasn't really a big deal anymore and there were no hard feelings. Next time, I don't think I'll be more polite, but I'll definitely be more direct about telling them to turn down their music. I'll just say something like "can you PLEASE turn that s**t down? I'm trying to get some rest here."

I've felt bothered by the noise of neighbors in every place I've lived other than my parents' home. I grew up in two consecutive houses that were solidly built and quiet, and I never had to hear neighbor noise. But since then, I've lived in rented apartments, and not a single one of them has been peaceful.

In my first place of my own, the guy across the hall was a guitarist, and played his electric guitar LOUDLY, all day long, and sometimes into the night too.

Now, I was a musician myself at that time, but ironically it was because of that that I needed quiet in order to write my songs, and do my own playing. Regarding my own playing, I always either played via headphones in my amplifier, or theumb-strummed my acoustic guitar. I didn't even like for my own playing to be heard by neighbors, as when you play at home it's always practice, mistakes, etc, not a performance, so I liked my privacy and kept mine quiet.

I had to go speak to the guy several times. He would turn it down then forget again the next day.

The next place I lived, I was on the ground floor and the guy above me seemed to be walking around with lead boots on. I heard every bump, thump, footstep or dropped item above my head. It drove me batsh!t crazy. I started thumping back, on my wall. He didn't care and thumped back at me. In the end I was the one who got evicted for bothering him. : (

In that same place, the apartment immediately next to me had a guy who played heavy metal loud, another intolerable situation.

In the next place I lived, I think just one neighbor below me played music too loud, but he moved out and I mostly had a quiet time in that place.

In the place I live now, the neighbor immediately next to me invites a bunch of friends over during the week, and they talk LOUDLY. And I don't just mean chit chat and laughter. For some weird reason they always seem to be SHOUTING at each other, declaiming passionately and arguing in very, very loud and raised voices. This can go on until 3 in the morning --- on a weeknight when I'm trying to get a decent night's sleep because I have to get up early for work the next day.

I've spoken to this guy time and time again, and appealed to his reason that this is UNreasonable, and he always says he's sorry -- and then keeps on doing it.

In this same place, the guy above is a repeat of the "dropping stuff and thudding about" guy I had two apartments ago. Except this one now is even worse. There are almighty thuds so loud I actually jump. It honestly sounds as if he just pushed a giant piece of furniture to fall onto his floor/my ceiling. I cannot even imagine what the hell is happening up there for such building-shaking thuds to happen. The ceiling/his floor is actually concrete, not wooden floorboards or anything -- my whole building is concrete -- so whatever it is has to be really heavy to make an impact that transmits so loudly through that.

I'm at my wit's end and bitterly regretting not getting onto the home ownership property ladder when I once briefly had the chance, financially. Now I'm stuck in thin-walled rental apartments putting up with sh!tty neighbors for the rest of my old age.

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worst one was probably a residential home many years ago,the next door neighbours was a old man and wife couple and the man was out every two days with his petrol lawn mower,strimmer and hedge trimmer,plus a fellow resident who was a right b***h; every single day thourhgout the day she woud stand there and scream to set off meltdowns and epileptic seizures of mine, and was told by staff she found weaknesses in everyone and woud target it,she found it funny;she had severe aspergers and mental health problems.

she physicaly attacked support staff and the two male residents who lived there because the staff professionaly coudnt fight back and the males were unable to.
she used to stand there and projectile vomit and rub it in her hair when the attention wasnt directed at her,and she woud also sht in her hand,roll it into small balls and eat it if she wasnt getting her own way then throw the rest at the high ceiling because there wasnt anyway to get it down.

her massive need for attention comes from the fact she was institutionalized most of her life and those places had used a protocol that said no staff talk to her unless to give orders,pretty unfair really if think about it but she was an absolute nightmare to live with.

when she started to get to close before screaming, had managed to knock her out several times, and was secretly thanked by support staff who had been terrorised by her for years but was then moved out of there,it shoud have been her moved out as she attacked everyone every day-in residential care there is always the one resident that gets more letoff
than others,have seen it in every home have been in.

I had a neighbor below me play loud music. I had to suffer through it. One time he woke me up at six in the morning and I was so pissed and I could not get back to sleep due to sleeping issues. I ended up napping in late afternoon. The music was so loud it rattled our floor and walls and furniture and not one neighbor came out of their unit shouting at the neighbor below me. Sometimes I would feel like melting down and I decided one day to cause a racket by pounding my feet on the floor hard so the man can tun his music up so neighbors will get mad and yell at him to teach him a lesson but it backfired. Then sometimes the guy next door would blare his TV but he didn't do it often. Then we moved out and I was relieved. Let the next person deal with them, their problem now. Then we moved into our house and the neighbors next door would blast their music and I thought oh great, I have to deal with this again. Oh well at least the house isn't right close to us so we can just close our windows. But then they stopped when we moved in.