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Joe90
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03 Oct 2014, 10:23 am

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I'd never deliberately stare at a person I'm not talking to. It's something that happens when I'm talking to someone cuz we were taught to maintain eye contact when talking to someone. When it doesn't come naturally it ends up being stare. I know what you mean about those staring moments. I don't think it's your medication as I refuse to take anti-depressant but have those little moments when I freeze. Apparently they're supposed to be tiny seizures, but nothing to worry about.


I never had staring moments before I went on the antidepressants. It's more like a tired stare, like I haven't slept for days, although I do sleep very well every night. I told a few people about it, and they said it's most likely a side effect of antidepressants, and I know a few people who are also on antidepressants and have that same sort of tired staring as I do. I always call it ''eyes on stalks''.


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nick007
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04 Oct 2014, 12:06 am

I never make eye contact but I have a rare low vision disorder & don't even look at people when they're talking to me sometimes. My teachers always thought I wasn't paying attention at begging of the year because I wasn't looking but they quickly learned I was 1ce they asked me questions. I have been accused of staring many times as a kid when I wasn't even looking at anyone. I was just daydreaming or looking at something out of the side of my eye but had my face looking rite at someone.


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Princessdracula
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04 Oct 2014, 12:31 am

I stare a lottttttt but not at people like I usually look away like I'm thinking of what to say or like I'm really into what I'm saying ? Idk about eye contact like ^^^^ I guess I do that bc Ive read like everywhere that eye contact makes u seem confidant so I just stare at someone's eyes while they're talking!???? :?: :?:



BeggingTurtle
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04 Oct 2014, 9:56 am

I stare a lot, usually when daydreaming, having an emotional blackout, or when making eye contact.


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Deb1970
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04 Oct 2014, 11:25 am

I have a hard time with this one. If I look into someones eyes I either look away quickly or I can't stop looking because I don't want the person to think I'm not interested. Good example is a job interview. I've been told I look away too much. I do this in order to visualize the question and answer I'm providing. When answering I know I have to look the interviewer in the eyes. This is very ,very, very, hard for me. I look at there forehead, mouth, and then look into there eyes. This is very uncomfortable. I will either keep eye contact too long or not long enough. I then start to show considerable anxiety, which is not good in a job interview.


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babybird
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04 Oct 2014, 11:32 am

I've never mastered eye contact. I either over do it or I just can't do it at all.

Which ever way, it always feel like one of the most excruciating things ever.


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Lumi
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04 Oct 2014, 11:42 am

I do...for about 3 seconds, stare right through the person. Frequently no eye contact.


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09 Oct 2014, 10:02 am

It's really hard to look at both eyes at the same time, and moving from one to the other feels weird, because it doesn't look as if that's what other people do.
Plus, if you do manage to focus properly you have to really concentrate on staying there, and that feels like proper staring (which probably doesn't look nice) and it distracts me from what's being said ...so then my eyes gravitate to their mouth. Not that i'm a lip reader, but it does seem to help, especially if there are lots of other noises around us.
I also feel myself staring when i see a beautiful flower, or e.g. an attractive face ~ flowers are usually russet or burgundy ish with a soft but not too velvety texture ...they kind of swallow me up but i don't mind coz it makes me feel warm and happy inside; the nice faces are usually very relaxed and gentle but with an alertness in the eyes that seems to see past my eyes, to who i am. Of course, god only knows what's really going on inside their heads, especially if they catch me being 'mesmerized' (which i stop myself doing as soon as i notice that's what i'm doing coz i don't want them to think i'm falling in love or something ~ which is probably one of the reasons i usually register people's presence with my peripheral vision).
When i have fallen in love and my 'stares' have been warmly received, i can hold eye contact a little longer with that person, but if they don't say anything i soon get uncomfy and have to turn away.
I'm really only able to maintain some semblance of normal eye contact when someone's made me angry, though in truth i'm taking notice of their eyes, mouth, eyebrows, cheeks ...anything that might help me notice a change in their mood ...so i can calm down as soon as they do ~ tho if they smile at me when i'm in that state it's likely to make me worse coz it doesn't make sense and i don't need them making me confused as well!
When i'm enthusing, i don't look at people coz my mind is usually picturing the thing/s i'm talking about and i'm sort of looking inwards ~ thankfully that doesn't seem to be regarded as rude.



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09 Oct 2014, 2:30 pm

Haha I know what you mean OP. My whole childhood I never looked anyone in the eye, but as I became older everyone around me told me how important it was to maintain eye contact, so I did my best to look people in the eyes as they spoke.

I ended up staring at them intently with a very serious gaze, and it made them uncomfortable. I later realised the effect I was having on people by staring at them, so now I just look at them and occasionally glance away, without fixating on the eyes too much. I think it works and I probably just appear slightly shy, which isn't a bad thing (even though it is false and I am not shy at all).



animalcrackers
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09 Oct 2014, 3:51 pm

Sometimes my eyes are pointing at other people when my vision is "turned off" and people may think I'm staring at them. It's not a regular thing but it's happened.


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10 Oct 2014, 3:06 pm

babyheart wrote:
Recently a friend of my brother's suddenly turned to me and began telling me something funny that happened between him and my bro. I felt uncomfortable but tried to appear interested and held his gaze as best as I could. The guy was talking normally until suddenly he blushed and started looking away. He ignored me after that. I don't know what my stare was like. I wonder if he thought I fancied him. I feel mortified to think about it even now.


Yes that has happened to me too. Or else the guy might start hitting on me. Either way I'm just horrified at giving the wrong impression and have no idea what to do about it.

I either give eye contact too intensely, or just can't really maintain it at all.

animalcrackers wrote:
Sometimes my eyes are pointing at other people when my vision is "turned off" and people may think I'm staring at them. It's not a regular thing but it's happened.


Yeah I do that too.