Am I a prude for this?
Caught some heat from other parents of high school age kids! I'm against "pajama day" for co-ed high school age kids. I find it perverted. Does this make me a bad person? I dropped my son off in the car line and I see these adult-sized teen-age girls skipping through a parking lot in feet pajamas holding teddy bears. I felt like vomiting because when I volunteer at their dances to handle food and beverages, I'll see the same people making out and dry-h**ping boys in dark corners. I'm repulsed - I don't know what more to say. Am I the only one that feels this way? It's just too weird.
But then again, kids will be kids.
The emphasis must be placed upon contraception--I see a few pregnancies coming of this situation if care is not taken.
I know that the last line of your reply was meant to be serious but I couldn't stop laughing - the tears of hilarity were rolling down my face.
Why would it make you a bad person
Society is perverted, shallow, fake and sexualizes children from an ever earlier age.
I was rather annoyed a few months ago. Had to buy DD's first bra. She turned 11 end of June.
Went into 4 high street chain stores before I managed to find one that was not padded
Some high street chains stores only sell padded bras, including the starter ones.
Bought her sport tops in the end as I wanted some variety and really could only find one unpadded 75AAA
Her BFF (one year older), whose mother is not so much of a prude as me I suppose used to let her daughter wear stuff that made me cringe. Her and DD have been friends for years though and her parents know that I speak my mind.
One day when the BFF was looking particularly tarty as we arrived I told her that if my DD would walk around like that I would take her to Amsterdam in that outfit for a sweet 16th party in a few years. And she could parade down the canals in the Red Light District of Amsterdam to get a taste of what boys and men really think when they see a provocatively dressed women.
BFF's dad got into the conversation and took my side regarding the 'Awakening Treatment' and in the end we all had a good laugh
Anyway, that was a few months back. SeemsBFF has taken to heart what I said and has refined her style since and even though she still is a 12-year old that dresses as a young adult she looks more respectable and has/is developing an awareness she never would have had I not laid into her.
And as for high school students with double standards... thy learn them froom the adults around them is the way I see things...
ETA: not even sure it's double standards, I mean in the end it's just a dress up thing innit?
Last edited by guzzle on 27 Oct 2014, 9:45 am, edited 1 time in total.
I find the juxtaposition of child-like behavior (teddy bears and footie PJs) with poorly-thought-out imitations of adult behavior (*ahem*) to be more than a little unnerving.
Kids' clothes these days scares me to death. I took my DS7 to The Mall yesterday (reluctantly, but he destroyed his backup glasses and his vision is 20/225 in one eye and 20/250 in the other, so going to the same-day lens place was pretty much not optional). Yeah-- I think I about threw up in the middle of Hot Topic (he saw Minecraft plushies on sale-- remarkable how my nearsighted second-grader who is barely reading on grade level can make out "Buy One Get One 50% Off" the first time from 30 feet away AND do the math in his head!!).
It wasn't just one store aimed at fanboys and fangirls with more money than maturity, either. The "respectable, mainstream" stores that aren't pandering to people who WANT to shock their parents aren't any better. I hadn't been in The Mall in about a year and a half-- God willing it will be at least that long before we have to go back.
Yeah, there's a reason my kids' clothes come pre-screened from thrift stores. YIKES!! !! !
That said, as long as they are wearing PAJAMAS and not LINGERIE (and on Pajama Day, for something fun and/or an earned privilege, not three days a week because they're too lazy to get dressed), I don't take too much issue with Pajama Day.
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"Alas, our dried voices when we whisper together are quiet and meaningless, as wind in dry grass, or rats' feet over broken glass in our dry cellar." --TS Eliot, "The Hollow Men"
lostonearth35
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We would have pajama day in junior high during the winter carnival we had each year before the March Break. It actually made school almost enjoyable for me. We also had "shorts and shades" day, and I won a prize because I was wearing those oversized novelty sunglasses that make your head look like it shrunk.
My mother was telling me the other day how people are always saying how kids walk around half-naked. She said it was like that too when she was a kid back in the 60's. Mini-skirts anyone. She told me there was even a trend where girls would wear dresses made out of some kind of paper, and they were so short you'd give everyone a panty-flash just moving around, and that you would buy special panties to go with them for that reason!
Just mulling it over: perhaps you could use this situation, if you haven't already, as an occasion to talk to your son about how a person's attire can shape the way they're perceived by others, that people's perceptions can vary, and that in the end, he (and those close to him, sometimes) may experience the consequences of the image he sends, for better and for worse.
It's kind of pervy for a couple of reasons:
1 The girls were infantilizing themselves, which is done to make women appear sexually vulnerable.
2 They're wearing what they wear to bed - you know, the place where people usually mate.
That said, I am a prude. I make no apologies for it. ![]()
This already happened last winter break during his freshman year. He and his friend went into a shopping district dressed like bikers - these older boys ruffed them up a bit. They were okay but really shook up with minor stratches and a bruise or two. They blocked most of the blows and managed to make a run for it. I felt so bad for them. Everybody should read what YippySkippy posted. It put forthright in words what I felt. I often find it difficult to explain in words what I feel.
Yippy did this for me!! Thank you YippySkippy!!
Read YippySkippy's post first. Do you see what I mean now??
Sorry, but I don't. I see an innocent pastime viewed through some skewed sexualized lens, and sexuality itself presented as nasty, or scary. As for pajamas=bedtime=sexual situations, I don't make that an automatic equation at all. Schools nationwide carry out pajama day, even with dress codes prohibiting provocative clothing. The emphasis on females in particular seems to me to uncomfortably echo"slut shaming"(A girl is asking for even unwanted advances by dressing a certain way.)
As for the combination of childlike and adult behavior, doesn't that sum up puberty? I don't want to shield my kids from the world, but have them learn how to successfully navigate it.
Everyone has their own views and opinions personally and as parents, so I feel like there's no right or wrong answer. A ban would inflict the sentiments of some onto everyone.
Read YippySkippy's post first. Do you see what I mean now??
Sorry, but I don't. I see an innocent pastime viewed through some skewed sexualized lens, and sexuality itself presented as nasty, or scary. As for pajamas=bedtime=sexual situations, I don't make that an automatic equation at all. Schools nationwide carry out pajama day, even with dress codes prohibiting provocative clothing. The emphasis on females in particular seems to me to uncomfortably echo"slut shaming"(A girl is asking for even unwanted advances by dressing a certain way.)
As for the combination of childlike and adult behavior, doesn't that sum up puberty? I don't want to shield my kids from the world, but have them learn how to successfully navigate it.
Everyone has their own views and opinions personally and as parents, so I feel like there's no right or wrong answer. A ban would inflict the sentiments of some onto everyone.
Ditto. We assign sexuality to innocent things. Its the same reason parents now get in trouble for taking innocent bathtime pictures of their baby's first bath. In other countries where we don't have warped sexual views, its not uncommon to see little ones running naked at the beach or pool. Here we view children as sexual, in the name of "protecting" them. As an abuse victim I find that stomach turning. Pajamas are not sexual. Bedtime is not sexual. Our society and its views however - in need of major change.
