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EzraS
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05 Nov 2014, 4:48 pm

A friend of mine on my teen forum had been having trouble with relationships. He PMed me about feeling cold and jaded and this was my response:

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You ever feel like your getting so cold and jaded inside it scares you..,,.


Yes and it kinda bothers me sometimes. But have always been that way with my autism. I really don't fully connect with others. Even family members. No one seems entirely real to me if that makes sense. Especially people I know online. Maybe I'm actually lucky in that respect.

How do you relate to that?



funeralxempire
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05 Nov 2014, 4:53 pm

That's pretty much how I've felt my entire life.


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sharkattack
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05 Nov 2014, 5:01 pm

Being on the Aspergers part of the Spectrum I can tell you this.

People don't ask me for advice.
I have never kissed or had a relationship.
I feel totally detached from other people.

I always had that feeling that my life is not entirely real visiting this board now I understand why.

Image


Lack of expression on my face no wonder we can not connect with the world hence it does not feel real to us.



BuyerBeware
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05 Nov 2014, 5:17 pm

I'm aware that other people are real, but it is pretty rare for me to actually feel a sense of connection with another person. If we're defining "connection" as "understanding and being understood," it hardly ever happens. I don't know if that's "detached" or not, but other than with my kids, I don't often feel connected.

I'd like to, it's nice when it happens, but I understand that connection is not going to be a real frequent occurrence in my life.


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tetris
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05 Nov 2014, 6:17 pm

Yeah, it's like they only exist when they are with me. So, like when I am by myself no one else exists, it's strange. I can also only ever get to a certain stage with making friends, like it never gets to the bit where they are actual friends, like people at college/school etc have only ever been/are school/college friends. It's quite annoying at times but it never changes.



Who_Am_I
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05 Nov 2014, 9:53 pm

Yep. That feel when autistic.


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r2d2
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05 Nov 2014, 9:59 pm

I think that to an extent that is autism across the spectrum in a nutshell. From the most mild Aspie to the most severe and profound classic autistic there is a bit more detachment and one is a bit more "in their own world" than neurotypical people. I'm guessing the extent of how detached and the extent to which one is "in their own world" largely corresponds with just how autistic someone is.

Word Origin:

from Greek autos self + -ism


autism

1912, from German Autismus, coined 1912 by Swiss psychiatrist Paul Bleuler (1857-1939) from comb. form of Greek autos- "self" (see auto- ) + -ismos suffix of action or of state. The notion is of "morbid self-absorption."

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/autistic


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L_Holmes
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05 Nov 2014, 10:19 pm

Always.


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kraftiekortie
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06 Nov 2014, 12:45 am

It's funny:

I don't feel detached from people and the world--but I don't feel attached, either.

I don't really form "full" attachments with lovers and others who are "close" to me. I tend to "love" them on an intellectual level. As for lovers, I feel for them, and I get turned on by them--but they always feel that there's "something missing."

Ezra: For some reason, I don't feel that you are totally detached from people--especially your family. What would happen, say, if your dad was hit by somebody in the street? I would bet that you would be quite upset about it--and perhaps feel like getting revenge upon the person who hit your dad. I know you really appreciate your dad very much.

I also don't sense that you'll be totally dependent when you grow up. I think you'll rely on your parents quite a bit--but I think you just might be able to live at least somewhat
independently eventually. I think you'll acquire lots of knowledge, and be useful with it.



gcfleetwood
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06 Nov 2014, 1:44 am

No attachment whatsoever. It's uncomfortable, almost to the point of being frightening.

My question is, though, what is it like to be attached? I mean, you always here people talking about connections and attachment, what is that? How do you define it? Would you even know if you were? I don't know if I understand the idea enough to rule either way.

Just something I've been wondering about...



Zajie
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06 Nov 2014, 4:35 am

Yes I do feel that but it doesn't bother me much if it was when I'm around nice people



FautheralLoather
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06 Nov 2014, 5:11 am

All the time.



Andrejake
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06 Nov 2014, 5:21 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
It's funny:

I don't feel detached from people and the world--but I don't feel attached, either.


I feel this way too.
I don't feel attached to anyone but at the same time I don't think I'm completely detached from everyone. It's confusing, I know, but it's how I feel.



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06 Nov 2014, 12:33 pm

Andrejake wrote:
It's funny:

I don't feel detached from people and the world--but I don't feel attached, either.

Me too.


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Lumi
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06 Nov 2014, 12:37 pm

EzraS wrote:
A friend of mine on my teen forum had been having trouble with relationships. He PMed me about feeling cold and jaded and this was my response:

Quote:
You ever feel like your getting so cold and jaded inside it scares you..,,.


Yes and it kinda bothers me sometimes. But have always been that way with my autism. I really don't fully connect with others. Even family members. No one seems entirely real to me if that makes sense. Especially people I know online. Maybe I'm actually lucky in that respect.

How do you relate to that?

I don't connect that much, but I can still enjoy the person.


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nick007
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06 Nov 2014, 7:14 pm

I felt detached from others all my life.


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