Do you use slang?

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Guess its hard to say since I'm not the one listening to how I talk, I would say its probably sometimes yes sometimes no since I use quite a bit of slang and swear probably too much irl but sometimes I think I cross over into the formal/stilted side of things too. I don't think I'm a great communicator in general, especially when it relates to things outside my narrow range of focus at any given time.

It is very rare that I use slang, and when I do I use old words that are in the dictionary. I am very strongly biased against neologisms, and usually speak quite formally.

Also, many people in America (even in the media) have a habit of using "there's" where they should use "there're" (which really irks me), and after I accidentally did it one time I decided to do away with using contractions.

I don't type so formally when sending messages to certain family members though.

Having an informal conversation is perfectly possible without resorting to slang and sloppy grammar.

Exactly. A half-baked pizza is just like cheesy language.

Your signature emoticon reminds me of Christopher Walken in Deer Hunter.

Rarely. Most slang does not feel natural to me, so I don't use it. I was raised to speak a certain way and for the most part I've stuck to it, regardless of who I'm talking to. It might seem too formal or even arrogant to some people, but that's not my intention.