Got treated like crap everywhere I went today (long!)

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little_blue_jay
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30 Mar 2015, 10:29 pm

This will probably get long! Apologies! I just need to rant a bit....

I got treated like crap every single place I went to today.

HEADDESK INCIDENT #1: I had to go downtown today to photocopy my 16-page Self-Report as I'm applying for Disability (not just for Asperger's, I have other physical conditions as well) My welfare worker had told me that I could have my ODSP application mailed from the welfare office as they mail alot of stuff and they could pay for mailing it for me. So I copied everything and asked the woman at the front desk to mail it to ODSP. She gives me this tiny little envelope. My report is 16 pages. I start to measure how I'm going to fold up my wad of papers, and she says 'make sure your name and your worker's name is on the front'. I thought that was bizarre, and must have had a confused look on my face. I said I need it mailed to the ODSP office in Toronto. I asked for a bigger envelope. She says 'well it's just going to your worker isn't it?' ; I didn't know what she meant. I repeated no, I need it sent in the mail to Toronto. So the guy who was beside her gives me a bigger envelope and I put my papers in and seal it and start to write the address it's going to. I explained again that my worker said it was ok to have this mailed from the welfare office as it's ODSP-related. At this point a third person showed up behind the desk and were all staring at me as I tried to make them understand that this was outgoing mail, not something going to my worker. I wrote down the address and gave it to the guy as he seemed to know more what I was talking about. I asked again to be sure, that this was going to ODSP, he said to the 2 women, yes and just put it in the outgoing mail pile for tomorrow. But I mean seriously, I was very clear about what I wanted done with this envelope. But no, they have to make things more confusing for themselves and for me, for nothing. :roll: Why they didn't comprehend what I meant, is beyond me. So it better actually get sent in the mail, this application is very important.

HEADDESK INCIDENT #2: I had to mail 2 parcels at the Post Office. So after leaving welfare I go there. Wait in line while both clerks chat up someone they know who one of them is serving. Finally get my parcels weighed. First one, I say 'it's going by Air'. See - I hardly ever use this particular post office, only because I was downtown today did I use it. The one I normally use, they know me, I'm there alot, (I'm an ebay seller) and when I say 'it's going Air' they know exactly what I mean. So this lady says 'well all our parcels go Air, so you're using the wrong terminology to say it like that'. I say well I'm differentiating between using Air and using Surface. She says ' there is no Surface anymore, just Air so it's redundant to say Air'. At this point I just could not think clearly of how to respond to this so I was silent. She asks if I want Tracking, I said no. That service would not have been called Air anyway, it would have been called Tracked Packet. I did not ask for Tracked Packet, I asked for Air. She weighs the second parcel. I said this time, 'this one is going the same way'. I noticed that on the little screen facing me that it said "Sm Pkt Air" for the first parcel. This means Small Packet Air. So that is the way their own computer system calls it! She asks again for the second one 'do I want Tracking'. I said no, the same way as the first one. I was afraid to say Air again and have her tell me again that my terminology is wrong! :roll: :| And since I am at my other Post Office so often, they have given me a pile of Small Packet labels so that I can fill out the addresses at home rather than take up time in line to do it. So both parcels already had Small Packet labels affixed, so the method of shipping should have been apparent from that :| So finally we are nearly done. I have a Venture One card as I am an ebay seller, so I try to hand her the card for scanning, and she says that the shipping methods I chose would not be affected by scanning the card. Well when I order my ebay packs over the phone with the Venture One people, they told me to have my card scanned for every parcel transaction I do. I mean it obviously wouldn't make a difference when buying stamps, but they must have some reason for telling me to scan my card when sending parcels. So I explain to her that the Venture One people told me to do it this way, and she says to effect of 'why would I bother to scan your card, it makes no difference at all in how much you're paying today, due to your chosen shipping methods'. Wow - I didn't think scanning a card through a reader was so much of a "bother" - wow :roll: :roll: So I put the card away and pay, but jeez whatever happened to "the customer is always right"? What the hell's the problem with just scanning the card anyway, just because the customer is asking you to? I was told to do it this way! This bugs me now, that I should have insisted the card get scanned, or stand there and wait for her to do it and not pay until she does! What the hell has happened to customer service these days??

So both of these incidents occurred probably within 15 minutes. So I had to walk to the train station to inquire about train fares to Toronto as I have an Asperger's assessment (or at least an interview to see if he'll assess me further - this is the 3rd person I've tried to see about assessments, let's hope 3rd time's the charm!) So I have about a 10 minute slow walk to the train station - in this time I'm mulling over these 2 incidents, and by the time I get to the train station I'm still puzzled but relaxed. But not for long.....

HEADDESK INCIDENT #3: I get into the train station. Wait at the window with no sign of a clerk anywhere. Wait several minutes. No bell. I lean into the little talking-space in the window and say "hello?" what I thought was softly, but as the place was empty my voice seemed to echo louder than I intended. Woman appears. I inquire about train fares to Toronto. She points at a departure schedule booklet beside me that I hadn't noticed. There are no fares listed. I explain that I tried to find out fares online but that I was given the same fares both for round-trip and for one-way, and that I need to find out which is accurate. She explains that fares vary according to day of the week and that as the train fills up the fares go up. It's a good thing I didn't wait till my appointment to buy a ticket. She says the tickets are non-refundable. I give her all the information as to what day I'm going. She asks me what train I'd be returning on. I say the 5:30 might not give me enough time as it's a medical appointment that I don't know how long will last, and I might not make it back to the station for 5:30, so I said I'll take the 7:10 back. She starts to argue with me, saying 'you'll pay less if you take the 5:30 as the 7:10 is more booked up than the 5:30'. I said how much less, she says about a couple bucks. Less than a couple bucks if I recall correctly. But where I am going is some distance from the train station, and as I have POTS which makes my heart race I don't want to be having to rush, in case my appointment lasts till 5. I don't feel I should have to explain all the details of this to her, my reasons! All she needs to know is I want to return on the 7:10. She gives this big huge sigh like I'm such a trial to her. I said no, I'll choose the 7:10, thank you. She says again that the ticket is non-refundable. I mean, why ask the customer what they want, when her mind's made up already, as to what I "should want"! :roll: I had already told her it was a medical appointment, and does anybody know exactly how long their medical appointments are going to last, before they go?? :| I'm puzzled that by now she has said twice that the tickets are non-refundable ~ this is for a medical appointment that I'm greatly anticipating, so unless I'm struck down with a severe stomach bug, I will not be wanting a refund!! All the cash I had on me by now was American money, so I ask if they take American, she says yes. I hand the money. She takes it into a back room I couldn't see. She comes back out and asks if I have 'anything smaller'. They were all $20's. It's not like I'm paying with a $100 here. She says 'and you don't have Canadian?' I said no. (Excuse me for not having my welfare cheque yet :| ) She gives another big sigh. Again, what the hell's happened to customer service?? She gives me my change and hands me the ticket, and says to be here for 20 minutes before the train is due to leave. I said 'ok, thank you' and start to walk away. There was a lady in line behind me and she walks up to the window, but the woman again says to me as I'm walking away, 'remember those tickets are not refundable!' WTF I need to be told this 3 times??! ! Seriously, I cannot possibly look that unsure of myself that I need to hear this 3 times in the span of 3 minutes. It's a freakin' medical appointment - odds are 99 to 1 I will not be needing a refund! :evil: I didn't even ask if they are refundable - I can understand if I'd asked that perhaps she says it once or twice, but I didn't even ask! :roll:

On top of everything else my aunt & my grandma keep pressuring me to resume communication with my deadbeat father (long story, I met him for the first time in my life 2 years ago, I don't like him, when he visited me he asked me for a hug and after a minute I "felt something" -move- on his part, he disgusts me, guess we're sort of estranged, plus he treated my roommate who's my best friend like trash) They are not respecting my wishes to not discuss him anymore. They keep trying to pressure me, saying if I talk with him he'll send me a bit of money but I don't trust him; he has sent me two bad cheques already with stop payments on them. I can't understand why they would want to put me in harm's way again, he is basically a total stranger to me. I feel goaded into discussing this in email with my aunt, I keep requesting she not discuss it anymore. I said if & when he wants to help me out financially no strings attached, he has my email address, he can do a Paypal transfer. I have never received one cent from him my whole life, he got off scot-free, no child support. Really a story for another thread some day. At 3:30 this morning I emailed my aunt to say I just cannot discuss this anymore and that all this is making me dread checking my email. I just can't take being pressured anymore.


But seriously, is Mercury retrograde this week or what?


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Diagnosed "Asperger's to a moderate degree" April 7, 2015.
Aspie score 145 of 200
NT score 56 of 200
AQ score: 47
RAADS-R score: 196
"Everyone inside the circle is normal. Everyone outside the circle should be beaten, broken, and reset, so they can be brought inside the circle. Failing that, they should be institutionalized, or worse, pitied. Why would you feel sorry for someone who gets to opt out of the inane courteous formalities, which are utterly meaningless, insincere, and therefore degrading? Can you imagine how liberating it would be to live a life free of all the mind-numbing social niceties? I don't pity this kid. I envy him." Dr. Gregory House, speaking of a boy with autism, House M.D.


slave
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31 Mar 2015, 2:35 am

little_blue_jay wrote:

On top of everything else my aunt & my grandma keep pressuring me to resume communication with my deadbeat father (long story, I met him for the first time in my life 2 years ago, I don't like him, when he visited me he asked me for a hug and after a minute I "felt something" -move- on his part, he disgusts me, guess we're sort of estranged, plus he treated my roommate who's my best friend like trash) They are not respecting my wishes to not discuss him anymore. They keep trying to pressure me, saying if I talk with him he'll send me a bit of money but I don't trust him; he has sent me two bad cheques already with stop payments on them. I can't understand why they would want to put me in harm's way again, he is basically a total stranger to me. I feel goaded into discussing this in email with my aunt, I keep requesting she not discuss it anymore. I said if & when he wants to help me out financially no strings attached, he has my email address, he can do a Paypal transfer. I have never received one cent from him my whole life, he got off scot-free, no child support. Really a story for another thread some day. At 3:30 this morning I emailed my aunt to say I just cannot discuss this anymore and that all this is making me dread checking my email. I just can't take being pressured anymore.


But seriously, is Mercury retrograde this week or what?


re: your family

If I were you, I would say" I am NOT going to discuss my father anymore. This conversation is OVER. That is final."

you must be brutally firm

your dad doesn't deserve a single fvck to be given by you.

your boundaries must be clear and ABSOLUTE.


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Since the birth of civilization, small sets of dominant individuals have controlled the numerical majority. Even a cursory reading of world history will substantiate this claim. Kings, Pharaohs, Emperors, Sultans, Czars, and Dictators have imposed their will upon their subjects. This pattern has not changed over the millennia and it remains so, today. Our Masters rule over every nation and no one can defy them. They will attain Absolute Power as we reach the Singularity. All those who oppose their will, will be destroyed. Given the obvious futility, I will not resist. 2+2=5.


little_blue_jay
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31 Mar 2015, 2:46 am

Thank you Slave. I am doing just that. That I am his daughter and that he was sexually aroused when I hugged him is just unforgivable to me - and how many times I've asked not to discuss it anymore... I am just tired of the whole topic with them, then they make it sound like I am the one who cannot forgive how he treated my roommate and I need to bury my anger, etc. Nobody respects my wishes on this.

Sorry my post was so long up there. I just needed to get my story out to the universe I guess. I've just never had one of those days where *every single* place I went to I got treated like sh*t, or misunderstood so badly, etc.


_________________
Diagnosed "Asperger's to a moderate degree" April 7, 2015.
Aspie score 145 of 200
NT score 56 of 200
AQ score: 47
RAADS-R score: 196
"Everyone inside the circle is normal. Everyone outside the circle should be beaten, broken, and reset, so they can be brought inside the circle. Failing that, they should be institutionalized, or worse, pitied. Why would you feel sorry for someone who gets to opt out of the inane courteous formalities, which are utterly meaningless, insincere, and therefore degrading? Can you imagine how liberating it would be to live a life free of all the mind-numbing social niceties? I don't pity this kid. I envy him." Dr. Gregory House, speaking of a boy with autism, House M.D.


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31 Mar 2015, 11:39 am

little_blue_jay wrote:
Thank you Slave. I am doing just that. That I am his daughter and that he was sexually aroused when I hugged him is just unforgivable to me - and how many times I've asked not to discuss it anymore... I am just tired of the whole topic with them, then they make it sound like I am the one who cannot forgive how he treated my roommate and I need to bury my anger, etc. Nobody respects my wishes on this.

Sorry my post was so long up there. I just needed to get my story out to the universe I guess. I've just never had one of those days where *every single* place I went to I got treated like sh*t, or misunderstood so badly, etc.


WP is here for people to vent and rant. With bureaucrats anything of order they tend not to handle well. Sounds familiar. :wink:


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31 Mar 2015, 12:18 pm

Wow! Your story is something right out of the movies Brazil ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brazil_%281985_film%29 ) or maybe Nineteen Eighty-Four ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nineteen_ ... %28film%29 ).

Governments and their camp followers frequently love to employ some individuals who make hostile, petty, bureaucrats. These public servants don't know their places, and presume to dictate to others (though, to be fair, they are probably just trying to be as efficient and quick as they can), despite realizing that they have met the limit of their careers. I know. I was in their shoes twice in my professional life.


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31 Mar 2015, 3:02 pm

little_blue_jay wrote:
Thank you Slave. I am doing just that. That I am his daughter and that he was sexually aroused when I hugged him is just unforgivable to me

:arrow: There is no going back from that point. He is one sick fvck.
You deserve so much better.

- and how many times I've asked not to discuss it anymore... I am just tired of the whole topic with them, then they make it sound like I am the one who cannot forgive how he treated my roommate and I need to bury my anger, etc. Nobody respects my wishes on this.

:arrow: Then command and control is all that remains.

Sorry my post was so long up there. I just needed to get my story out to the universe I guess. I've just never had one of those days where *every single* place I went to I got treated like sh*t, or misunderstood so badly, etc.


Be well. :D


_________________
Since the birth of civilization, small sets of dominant individuals have controlled the numerical majority. Even a cursory reading of world history will substantiate this claim. Kings, Pharaohs, Emperors, Sultans, Czars, and Dictators have imposed their will upon their subjects. This pattern has not changed over the millennia and it remains so, today. Our Masters rule over every nation and no one can defy them. They will attain Absolute Power as we reach the Singularity. All those who oppose their will, will be destroyed. Given the obvious futility, I will not resist. 2+2=5.


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31 Mar 2015, 3:28 pm

You can go all passive-aggressive to get your relatives to stop talking to you about your estranged dad. It works like this.

Are you going to call your father?
- I'll think about it....

When are you going to call him?
- Possibly tomorrow...

Why don't you call him?
- I'm not sure...

Don't you want him to send you a bit of money as you need it?
- I guess so...

Now call your dad already and quit stalling!! !
- Ok...

Well did you call him already?!
- I'm thinking about it...

Eventually their heads will explode and they will realize nothing they say is of any use.