STOP BLAMING MY HONESTY ON ASPERGERS!

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In fact, there are a lot of things that I wish people would stop blaming on Asperger's, but the main thing my wife tends to do a lot is blame my being brutally honest on having Asperger's. I keep trying to tell her having Asperger's has nothing at all to do with it. It's the fact that whatever I say is exactly what I mean. Nothing is sugarcoated for a reason.

When we are old, we find out that lying is wrong...till you find those same people have been lying to you, too. You also grow up finding out that some people hate you jut for being honest, and others do for you lying to them about it. So, what is a wo/man to do when no matter what you do, you can't exactly win the game? You just hand it out. You just be honest, and hope they appreciate you for it. And if they hate you for being brutally honest, then what can you do? That says more about them than it does about you.

Not to mention, that being honest about thins is more therapeutic than people would think. After all, if feels incredibly horrible telling people just things they want to hear because it feels similar to lying.

a person can be honest in a nice way. that's easier for neurotypicals.

Blame??. It should be appreciated.

I prefer honesty for two reasons:

#1 – It’s consistent with my moral code
#2 – It’s simpler to tell the truth (as it doesn’t require complex thought processes to ensure that the lie is infallible)

I'm happy to blame Asperger's when I feel compelled to be honest even if it's not in my own best interest but sometimes things can be phrased in softer manner and still be true.

Honesty is more an expression of opinion than an expression of truth. And it is over-rated. Usually it's a sign of putting too much faith in the verbal.

I have to be brutally honest with you here. It is the Aspergers.
It's linked to a deficit in Theory of Mind and a compulsion to talk about facts.
Facts are interesting. Manipulating people is not very interesting.
It's an autistic way of thinking.
Of course just about anyone is capable of lying to keep from getting in trouble.

It is perfectly fine to be honest, but that doesn't mean you have to point out every flaw or mistake you notice another person make because you have to 'say something honest' sometimes you don't have to say anything or point something out.

I am not one to be blunt, and I hate receiving blunt answers most of the time. I spend most of my life lying just to please or manipulate other people. I like to be honest in other ways, for example I would never want to cheat on my partner or steal money from people or sit there telling a load of BS when I know that just telling the truth won't hurt anyone or make any difference.

It's white lies I tell. They often work. Most Aspies are against white lies and see no purpose in them. I cannot relate. If I had a clingy friend who I wanted a bit of space from for a week, I wouldn't phone them up and say "oh I won't be meeting you this week, you are annoying and I need a break from you before I explode." I know it's blunt and honest, but I wouldn't want to be told that myself, so why would I tell someone else that? Instead I would phone up and say a plausible excuse. At least then, according to my friend, there's a chance it could be true. That's how white lies work.

I agree with Marybird.

I like facts much better than manipulation.

I like petting kitty cats better than talking about the latest fashion trends.