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pezar
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18 Sep 2015, 5:39 pm

A well liked athletic coach at a local university killed himself a month ago. The Sacramento Bee put up the following story on how his family is coping:

http://www.sacbee.com/news/local/article35053485.html

He apparently killed himself because his girlfriend dumped him. I will never understand the "I can't live without you!" mindset of some NT young males, up to the point where they kill themselves over a girl. There are plenty of fish in the sea, especially if you're a young, muscular, healthy, NT male. But you can't get your life back. Aspies tend to have a lot more problems, but the aftermath of a successful suicide is difficult to predict.



kraftiekortie
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18 Sep 2015, 6:07 pm

As far as what happens to the actual person committing suicide, It depends on what religion you believe in.

As far as the people who know this person well.....the person's suicide will invariably have a great impact all around.



Noca
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18 Sep 2015, 9:47 pm

This is a post from a depression forum that helped me answer that question.

Quote:
What happens when you die?

You're no longer here for the people who love you and need you and who will be frightened and alone without you there to support and guide them, like your kids.

You can no longer receive nor give love to those you care about.

You will never see your boyfriend again, never again know the times you have been happy. You will never ever have answers to the questions about what awaits around the corner.

You will miss every good thing that is still slated to come your way because you will not be here to receive it.

The untimely ending of your pain will be the beginning of it for so many others who don't want or deserve the burden. They will live with your absence and your choice to leave and the way you did it, and possibly the trauma if they are the ones to find you or identify you for the rest of their lives. And it may be contagious.

You will never have another chance at anything. The life you have lived and the point you are at is the farthest you will ever go, and this will be the most you will have ever accomplished.

That's what happens when you die.


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Drawyer
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18 Sep 2015, 10:18 pm

The post is so touch Noca..almost make me crying inside.


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androbot01
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19 Sep 2015, 11:25 am

Noca wrote:
Quote:
What happens when you die?

You're no longer here for the people who love you and need you and who will be frightened and alone without you there to support and guide them, like your kids.

You can no longer receive nor give love to those you care about.

You will never see your boyfriend again, never again know the times you have been happy. You will never ever have answers to the questions about what awaits around the corner.

You will miss every good thing that is still slated to come your way because you will not be here to receive it.

The untimely ending of your pain will be the beginning of it for so many others who don't want or deserve the burden. They will live with your absence and your choice to leave and the way you did it, and possibly the trauma if they are the ones to find you or identify you for the rest of their lives. And it may be contagious.

You will never have another chance at anything. The life you have lived and the point you are at is the farthest you will ever go, and this will be the most you will have ever accomplished.

That's what happens when you die.


For heaven's sake, everybody dies one way or another. The above is too soppy for me. What if no one loves you? Does that mean you should go ahead and do it?
And this nonsense about accomplishments. Practically no one ever accomplishes anything of value. This planet is teeming with humans, all thinking they're special.
Truly, I don't think choosing to leave this hell on your own terms is remarkable. If anything, it's empowering to know there is an escape.



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19 Sep 2015, 5:57 pm

Yeah, that whole nonsense about all the pain you will cause others as a reason not to kill yourself...what a load of crap! Look, sometimes you just reach the point where you can't take any more, and living is just unbearable. Most people struggle for a long time before they give up. Nobody want to hurt anyone, but do you really think that the temporary pain inflicted on those left behind is really going to be a reason to keep on feeling like s**t day after day?


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19 Sep 2015, 6:01 pm

You know, I'm really getting tired of this stupid censoring of words, here. You can stick an asterisk in it, but everyone knows it's still s**t, f**k, c**t, or whatever? What stupidity!


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"Patriotism, whether it is of the Western kind, or of the Eastern kind, is the same, a poison in human beings that is really distorting thought. So patriotism is a disease, and when you begin to realize, become aware that it is a disease, then you will see how your mind is reacting to that disease. When, in time of war, the whole world talks of patriotism, you will know the falseness of it, and therefore you will act as a true human being." -- Jiddu Krishnamurti


Basso53
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19 Sep 2015, 7:32 pm

pezar wrote:
Aspies tend to have a lot more problems, but the aftermath of a successful suicide is difficult to predict.


The aftermath of a successful suicide on a person's loved ones is very easy to predict, and not at all a very pretty picture. :cry:


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Raleigh
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19 Sep 2015, 8:56 pm

Noca wrote:
This is a post from a depression forum that helped me answer that question.

Quote:
What happens when you die?

You're no longer here for the people who love you and need you and who will be frightened and alone without you there to support and guide them, like your kids.

You can no longer receive nor give love to those you care about.

You will never see your boyfriend again, never again know the times you have been happy. You will never ever have answers to the questions about what awaits around the corner.

You will miss every good thing that is still slated to come your way because you will not be here to receive it.

The untimely ending of your pain will be the beginning of it for so many others who don't want or deserve the burden. They will live with your absence and your choice to leave and the way you did it, and possibly the trauma if they are the ones to find you or identify you for the rest of their lives. And it may be contagious.

You will never have another chance at anything. The life you have lived and the point you are at is the farthest you will ever go, and this will be the most you will have ever accomplished.

That's what happens when you die.


I find this post offensive on so many levels.
Think how this sounds to people who've lost loved ones to suicide.
If you commit suicide you're a selfish a***hole.
Not someone who had a terminal mental illness they couldn't continue fighting against.
It's like saying someone with terminal cancer is an a***hole for dying.
What's the difference?


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androbot01
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20 Sep 2015, 6:02 am

People sometimes seem to be angry at another's perceived weakness when they commit suicide. And I think there is more than anger, almost a sense of being offended. Like suicide is bad manners because look out how great the world we made is. Suicide is viewed as rejection of society and of one's social network. I think this is where the anger comes from, in part.



syzygyish
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20 Sep 2015, 6:37 am

Raleigh wrote:
Noca wrote:
This is a post from a depression forum that helped me answer that question.

Quote:
What happens when you die?

You're no longer here for the people who love you and need you and who will be frightened and alone without you there to support and guide them, like your kids.

You can no longer receive nor give love to those you care about.

You will never see your boyfriend again, never again know the times you have been happy. You will never ever have answers to the questions about what awaits around the corner.

You will miss every good thing that is still slated to come your way because you will not be here to receive it.

The untimely ending of your pain will be the beginning of it for so many others who don't want or deserve the burden. They will live with your absence and your choice to leave and the way you did it, and possibly the trauma if they are the ones to find you or identify you for the rest of their lives. And it may be contagious.

You will never have another chance at anything. The life you have lived and the point you are at is the farthest you will ever go, and this will be the most you will have ever accomplished.

That's what happens when you die.


I find this post offensive on so many levels.
Think how this sounds to people who've lost loved ones to suicide.
If you commit suicide you're a selfish a***hole.
Not someone who had a terminal mental illness they couldn't continue fighting against.
It's like saying someone with terminal cancer is an a***hole for dying.
What's the difference?


Raleigh, your misquoting this post! :evil:
.

There's a difference between death and suicide

Death is the end of unrelenting and endless pain(or it should be!)

Suicide is the result of the failure of society to create safety nets for the vulnerable members of society to be caught in!

Call me a Socialist!

I ******* Dare you!


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VegetableMan
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20 Sep 2015, 9:47 am

Ann, what you describe is the selfish aspect of grief. It's understandable, of course, as we all have that side to us as humans. Oddly enough, though, I don't believe I ever really went through the anger phase of grief. I didn't judge my friend at all -- and I understood her actions because I suffer from depression, and have been to the precipice a number of times.


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"Patriotism, whether it is of the Western kind, or of the Eastern kind, is the same, a poison in human beings that is really distorting thought. So patriotism is a disease, and when you begin to realize, become aware that it is a disease, then you will see how your mind is reacting to that disease. When, in time of war, the whole world talks of patriotism, you will know the falseness of it, and therefore you will act as a true human being." -- Jiddu Krishnamurti


Raleigh
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20 Sep 2015, 5:13 pm

syzygyish wrote:
Raleigh wrote:
Noca wrote:
This is a post from a depression forum that helped me answer that question.

Quote:
What happens when you die?

You're no longer here for the people who love you and need you and who will be frightened and alone without you there to support and guide them, like your kids.

You can no longer receive nor give love to those you care about.

You will never see your boyfriend again, never again know the times you have been happy. You will never ever have answers to the questions about what awaits around the corner.

You will miss every good thing that is still slated to come your way because you will not be here to receive it.

The untimely ending of your pain will be the beginning of it for so many others who don't want or deserve the burden. They will live with your absence and your choice to leave and the way you did it, and possibly the trauma if they are the ones to find you or identify you for the rest of their lives. And it may be contagious.

You will never have another chance at anything. The life you have lived and the point you are at is the farthest you will ever go, and this will be the most you will have ever accomplished.

That's what happens when you die.


I find this post offensive on so many levels.
Think how this sounds to people who've lost loved ones to suicide.
If you commit suicide you're a selfish a***hole.
Not someone who had a terminal mental illness they couldn't continue fighting against.
It's like saying someone with terminal cancer is an a***hole for dying.
What's the difference?


Raleigh, your misquoting this post! :evil:
.

There's a difference between death and suicide

Death is the end of unrelenting and endless pain(or it should be!)

Suicide is the result of the failure of society to create safety nets for the vulnerable members of society to be caught in!

Call me a Socialist!

I ******* Dare you!

How am I misquoting?
Quote:
The untimely ending of your pain will be the beginning of it for so many others who don't want or deserve the burden. They will live with your absence and your choice to leave and the way you did it, and possibly the trauma if they are the ones to find you or identify you for the rest of their lives. And it may be contagious.

I'm not sure what this means for you, but to me it's saying the victim of suicide is actively choosing to inflict pain and trauma on the undeserving people around them i.e. They are considered selfish.

My dad killed himself. The comments I heard about his death were: "He was so selfish. He didn't think of his family/ those who had to clean up the mess."

My stepfather died of terminal cancer. The comments were: "At least he's free of pain now/it must have been terrible for him to go through so much suffering."

Was my father in any less pain? And yet society judges him as weak and selfish. That's what I meant by "What's the difference". Sometimes I'm not very clear.

Why would I call you a socialist?


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Noca
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20 Sep 2015, 6:37 pm

Raleigh wrote:
Noca wrote:
This is a post from a depression forum that helped me answer that question.

Quote:
What happens when you die?

You're no longer here for the people who love you and need you and who will be frightened and alone without you there to support and guide them, like your kids.

You can no longer receive nor give love to those you care about.

You will never see your boyfriend again, never again know the times you have been happy. You will never ever have answers to the questions about what awaits around the corner.

You will miss every good thing that is still slated to come your way because you will not be here to receive it.

The untimely ending of your pain will be the beginning of it for so many others who don't want or deserve the burden. They will live with your absence and your choice to leave and the way you did it, and possibly the trauma if they are the ones to find you or identify you for the rest of their lives. And it may be contagious.

You will never have another chance at anything. The life you have lived and the point you are at is the farthest you will ever go, and this will be the most you will have ever accomplished.

That's what happens when you die.


I find this post offensive on so many levels.
Think how this sounds to people who've lost loved ones to suicide.
If you commit suicide you're a selfish a***hole.
Not someone who had a terminal mental illness they couldn't continue fighting against.
It's like saying someone with terminal cancer is an a***hole for dying.
What's the difference?

Have I offended you with that post? Good! Idgaf


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DSM-V: ASD level 2 with Social Communication Severity: level 2, Restrictive Repetitve Behaviour: level 2

ADOS-2 classification: Autism


Raleigh
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20 Sep 2015, 7:54 pm

^ No, you haven't offended me.
The post is putting forward some views that are, in my opinion, offensive.


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Feyokien
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20 Sep 2015, 8:07 pm

Same thing that happens when you die any other way, you die.
Tolkien put it much more eloquently though
"death is just another path, one we must all take"

I think suicide takes a hell of a lot of bravery. Someone can only take so much pain before it outweighs the suffering it will cause to the living.