do not resuscitate? Autistic kiddo with heart problems

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I just saw this and while I feel very sad for this teen boy, I have to say that something just does not make sense. The fact that a mother wants him not to be resuscitated makes me wonder why. I guess I have only heard such things for the elderly or if someone would be in a vegetative state, not because he'd have to take some medications and have surgeries.To me, honestly, it seems mom can't be bothered because the boy is autistic and she's just tired. What are your thoughts?

http://news.yahoo.com/video/alabama-wom ... 89ee45756a

Sounded to me more like the docs (for whatever they know) believe that, from here out, his life will be a downward spiral of medication and surgery (as opposed to maintenance meds or multiple surgeries with hope for improvement), culminating in the relatively near future with "living" in a medically-induced coma.

Autism notwithstanding, that doesn't sound like a whole lot of life to me.

My FIL's last 18 months were pretty much like that. Yeah, OK, we had a love-hate relationship...

...but I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I think I would have smacked anyone who demanded that FIL be put on dialysis and dragged back from death's door the last time he went to the hospital. Not because I wanted rid of him, but because I don't think I can hate ANYONE enough to demand that they "live" like that, not even for any hope of improvement, but merely for the delay of death.

My mother died like that, taking experimental treatment after experimental treatment for metastasized cancer, eventually not even hoping to recover, just grasping at a few more months, a few more weeks. The upshot of that was that, eventually, she wore out and pretty much starved to death at home in bed (because nothing stayed down long enough to be absorbed, not because nutrition was withheld). I don't guess it was that traumatic to witness (at least not from my POV, but you'd have to ask her mother ). I'll bet it really bit the big one for her, though. I know she made at least two abortive suicide attempts in the last year of her life. To this day, I wish I'd kept my stupid mouth shut and let her succeed. I didn't save her life; I just prolonged her suffering. In my defense, I was 11 years old and under the created delusion that she would recover if we could just keep her alive long enough.

OTOH, I tried to kill myself once. I believed that I had no quality of life left and that it was all downhill from here. I even had professionals basically tell me that. It turned out later that they were hustling SSDI and trying to turn me into another cash cow. Obviously the autism isn't going away, but the risperidone went away and took the profound disability with it. I am no longer sitting on the couch drooling on myself, literally dragging myself to the bathroom, in agonizing pain, no longer able to function well enough to prepare convenience food, too close to catatonia to carry a conversation or play with a child or "be alive" and yet somehow totally aware of everything that's happening to me.

Depression still visits frequently, and I still have days when I wouldn't mind a visit from the mortality fairy, but I am living and that life does have quality, and I am glad on the whole that I continue to do so. They tell me the PTSD is probably due to that summer, and it will probably ALMOST go away in a few more years' time.

If the state that I was in in the summer of 2011 was going to be the best the rest of my life was ever going to be, and it was only going to get worse from there?? NO. PLEASE, DO NOT RESUSCITATE. PLEASE, LET ME DIE.

Nobody should be forced to die simply because their life is inconvenient.

But I also don't think that someone should be forced to prolong life (with "life" being defined as "the continuation of brain activity and vital functions") simply because the thought of death is uncomfortable for other people to bear.

Isn't the kid terminally ill?
It is not so strange to dnr for terminally ill.

One news story says he is in hospice care.

Chances of successful cardiopulmonary resuscitation are 7%;
Chances of brain damage after successful CPR are 60%.

Chances of survival are slim, and more than half of those who do don't recover.

I can fully understand the decision to do without. It doesn't really work like it does on Grey's anatomy, where 80% survive perfectly fine, and the rest just die.

It's probably for the best. He won't suffer his whole life