My daughter has to stay out of class to not be bullied!

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My kid who has Asperger, is one of the most hard working and intelligent people I have ever seen in my life. I strongly believe that, because in the past, I was teaching math and science in high school and while doing my doctorate in engineering, I worked as TA in several engineering courses.
This year my daughter started her study in health sciences program in one of the best colleges in Quebec. At first everything was fine, she was studying, getting good marks and she had no problem. After a while one of the student started talking to her asking her which school she is from, and then when she found out that she is from an high school designed for Asperger's and kids with some mental issues (anorexia to depression...), she started making fun of her and telling my daughter in front of everyone that she knows a girl who had mental issues and went there, and my daughter must have been mental....These harassment accrues in their calculus class, because the prof has no control over the class or might not pay attention to what happens in his class. Once that girl brought my daughter to tears that my daughter had to get out of class, and when she was in that situation that was holding herself asked the prof to go out, the prof went to student services and said he was scared for his own safety when my daughter asked him "can I go out of the class"
My daughter got out and went to a counselor and send an email to the prof that what happened. Anyhow, the ombudsman spoke to the girl and she apologized to my daughter in front of the people from student services. My daughter went back twice more to the calculus class, but the harassment and name calling gotten worsen. My daughter got to the point that she couldn't focus and her mark was dropping (her calculus mark), she was so upset that in home she was just crying saying to me she wishes she was perfect, she wishes she didn't have Asperger.....she even scratched her face and her body while crying and hitting herself. I don't know what to do, that girl is bringing her to the point of suicide. That girl found an amusement in hurting and making fun of my daughter, but doesn't know how fragile she is and how much those words, breaks down my daughter.
This morning I told my daughter that if she wants I can go talk to student services, so even if they don't do any thing to improve the situation, at least they know, so when after these two years that girl who wanted to go to medical school, would have some note in her file to point out what kind of monster she is. But my daughter said that she doesn't want to do something to hurt that girl’s future. I told my daughter that how proud I am that she feels empathy even toward her enemies.
Anyhow, although we pay the same tuition fee as any other kid in her class, and it is her right to attend the class, But I told my daughter to not go to calculus class. I am going to teach her. I think it is the best strategy to keep her safe. What do you think??

First, thank you so much for posting this. Speaking out is the first step to solving a problem like this, so well done. It's great that you want to help your daughter because it shows that you really care about her.

I definitely think that, if you can, you should teach her. It's evident from what you've written that the bullying she is receiving from this horrible girl is too much for her to handle, and if it persists things will only get worse. If you can keep her safe from this, I think things will get much better for her and she will be able to reach her full potential.

When I was at school, I was also bullied and I didn't have any sufficient support from anybody, even when I began to develop a serious case of OCD and possible (undiagnosed) schizophrenia that led me to completely drop out of school last year. I haven't been back to school since then and I don't plan on going back into any form of education at least for a long time. But that's another story.

And here's a message for your daughter, if she reads this:

I'm going to tell you something, and I want you to keep it with you: no matter what anyone says, you are beautiful

Is it possible for your daughter to be homeschooled? I was homeschooled from Grade 2--Grade 8, and it was excellent.
It's taken me awhile to keep remembering that I'm beautiful...

That is ridiculous, kind of weird that girl isn't facing any consequences for the very obvious harassment.

Sometimes I think that the whole world is ridiculous.

If she were my daughter, I'd look up where the bully lives, take a baseball bat, go to their home, and bash his/her skull in and then do the same to her parents for spawning them.

Violence only creates more violence and makes the world a crueler place. Kindness creates more kindness and makes the world a better place.

I don't think it's fair to blame the parents for their daughter's bullying, and violence would only make everything worse.

If the parents or her beat the bully with a baseball bat that person will be in jail while the bully is martyered or if the bully comes out the beating intact go on to have a successfull career.

If the school continues to refuse to act sue.
If the professor is also so afraid he or she should go to the union if there is one.
Also most schools have an ombudsman.

Since pretty much every one of us here have been bullied, have the similar core traits and difficulties navigating the "normal" world, suggesting she can join here might not be a bad idea. The Heaven section is specifically there to support people in a fragile mental state.

Last edited by ASPartOfMe on 06 Nov 2015, 1:16 pm, edited 3 times in total.

? If she does what?

It's perfectly fair to blame the parents for their child's bullying. Parents should be obligated to teach their children that such behavior is wrong.

Parents don't teach their children to bully. Parents don't tell their children to bully other children. The girl is old enough to know that bullying is wrong. Unless she is suffering from a crippling mental disorder, her actions are her own responsibility.

That is an unfortunately naive. Some bullies its the only way they will respond. I say one good practice would be to try to teach your daughter positive ways to handle her anger. Also maybe get into some self defense classes too so she can be prepared for the possiblity of physical violence against her. Also your daughter beating that dumb b*****s face off the wall may not be the worse eventuality as your daughter could draw confidence from standing up for her self and it will teach that girl to think twice before she picks on people. I know it sounds nastt but some people really are that stupid that it may be the only effective way to stop it.

I can't help but feel, in a non violent way of course, that the people responsible for the bullying should face some consequences for their actions.

This!! !! !! !! !! !! ! And not just a "naughty, naughty, don't do it again" or a 15-minute detention, proper punishment! Bullies are cut way too much slack.

Um...lemonvariable, how is any of what I said naive? I know from personal experience that violence solves nothing, and that kindness can make the world a better place. I am an optimist, so we may disagree about some things, but I don't think I was being naive.
I agree, InsomniaGirl. Every action has consequences.