On Youtube: Woman with Aspergers talks about Cho

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Can anyone say "Borderline Personality Disorder?"

Geesh! I sure hope she doesn't get much airtime.

GREAT, Glad to hear it, I was hoping that was the case, that my answer would clear things up. I have known people that make 20% of what I make that seem to have class, and people that make thousands of times what I make that DON'T, so I don't judge people on what they make. I just got upset about how she spoke about this.

Still, I guess MBAs ARE mainly hired because of peripheral knowledge, creativity, or social standing, so the degree might not be as meaningful as one might expect. A few years ago, some magazines even spoke about, what one called, "the MBA glut"!

And I don't lie on my resume, but I play every legitimate trick in the book to make it look as good as possible. I have to make sure I always cover key areas, target the right market(s), etc... One really meaningless thing left off can make the difference between getting the job and not. Ironically, **I** was the only one that suspected that guy would flunk my interview, because he didn't have certain info on his resume. I'm surprised it even got to me, as it wouldn't even have gotten on the radar of most HR people!

BTW at the rate things are going, I am probably going to have to stretch a LOT in the coming decade. I am in a hot market right now and, for every legitimate candidate, there are about 992 illegitimate ones(based on my interview experience). Only 0.8% of the workers really know the product/technology!! !! That makes employers more suspicious, and jobs scarcer. Still, it is only a matter of time before that whole part of the economy dries up for the average american, and I will have to stretch to find more work. Luckily, *****NOBODY***** can know everything about the computer industry, but I am willing and able to attempt it.

Steve

What's wrong with you guys? Would the message be more effective if she were reading it off a cue card like a reporter? The video was obviously taken when she was in a specific mindframe that doesn't lend itself well to perfect articulation and grammar, or pronouns, or what the hell ever. Honestly, that's the most stark and piercing insight into the AS experience (from my point of view on the spectrum) that I've seen thus far. She said things in that video that were so freaking true that it's scary. Her emotional state only made the video more powerful to me. It was mesmerizing.

I run a social group for people with Asperger's. We have several women in the group and two them report the same common experience of social manipulation perpetrated by NT's.

The woman in the video sounds very like a friend of mine, she goes on and on about people taking advantage of her and manipulating her by employing their better-developed social skills. I find it difficult to follow her or understand her experience, and I can finding it overwhelming; like many Aspies, she monologues.

I have never been manipulated to the extent she describes. Once, a false friend made me lend him money to him ($50/£40) which I never got back, but nothing in comparison to the experiences my friend talks about.

Is this a common female Aspie experience, manipulation by the more socially skilled?

"Is this a common female Aspie experience, manipulation by the more socially skilled?"

Or, is this a common nongender-specific human experience.. manipulation by the manipulative?

Yes, with the MBA people really do have to have good social skills or be able to mimic them effectively to be able to get far, since there are so many others with good social skills and MBA's.

It's really strange how that guy got that far. It's amazing how much chutzpah, I guess you'd call it, some people seem to have about things like that.

I hope you can continue to do well in the job market and industry....you seem like you have what it takes and have the knowledgee and skills and are willing to put in the hard work. I don't know who in the US is going to buy the products produced by US companies if all the jobs get sent overseas........

Why would she be borderline? Some Aspies can get very emotional.

Well said maldoror! I agree

Like I said earlier...I did not realise it, the video is an Empathy Test. And it is an important and helpful lesson.

I discovered human emotions just 3 years ago. Previously, I was unaware of my unawareness of other peoples feelings. So people seemed crazy, selfish and unfair to me. Over half of peoples decisions and behaviours are based on their feelings, which I did not see.

What is real to the Aspie mind is touchable, measurable and weighable. Emotions are esoteric and internal, we don’t ignore them, we use logic to process social situations, but logic is not designed for understanding the human condition.

It’s like trying to force a broad-spectrum signal (Mhz-Ghz/Emotions-Facts) down an old narrow-band telephone wire, there is signal loss, only facts get conveyed down the wire.

Logic is knowledge about weird insects, the Titanic disaster, Anime, mineralogy etc. Emotions are for people.

I've heard Aspie men say the same thing though, that they have been manipulated a lot. I'd think it might happen to sme Aspies who really want to have friends really bad, and is open about that or their loneliness and/or desperation to make friends is somewhat obvious to unscrupulous NT's who'll take advantage. She seems to be quite an emotional person, probably is open and trusting and wears her heart on her sleeve so she might be more likely to get taken in than an Aspie who is more guarded. Some people also say that NT women are more socially skilled in general than NT men, so if there were some NT women who were socially skilled but unscrupulous, and there was an obviously lonely Aspie woman who longed for friends, it might be easy for them to take advantage.

Somehow, I think all Aspies probably have som talent/ability/strength. There HAVE been some things I have been laughed at or even LAUDED for! That tells me they are rare! Yet HERE, they seem COMMON! And I'm not talking rainman type stuff.

Steve

Oh, there was one other case of manipulation...

I am slowly coming to terms with the idea that I was manipulated by a girl who wanted to get married to escape her "mad mother". She, I am now realising, pretended to be infatuated with me in order to get me to marry her and help her flee an abusive domestic situation. It is a hard thing to accept. It was the first friendship I thought I experienced, but it was false and I was used. When she found someone else who was not asexual like me (a position I preferred at the time) she dropped me like a hot rock, an expression meaning the person suddenly abandons you.

As a result of being ignored by her etc., I had a nervous breakdown, 7 years ago now. That is how I started to find out about AS. I realised that I could not see how false her friendship was, nor see how weird she was, or cope with getting obsessed about it – obsessively guilty (That’s another thing I'd like to know, is obsessive guilt common in AS? I'll, open a new thread sometime). If I really accept that, and feel it, I’m sure I would be as messed up as my female friends are. I entertain the futile possibility she will "understand" me and forgive me - I know logically I did nothing wrong.

She's a bit dramatic!

I think Cho had brain damage more sociopath than AS.

Right on.

I identified with much of this woman's pain, but felt that she definitely should NOT have compared Cho, an obvious psychopath, to Asperger's syndrome. Highly irresponsible. I mean, she went on and on about how society sucks, how mean people can be to those of us who are "different," how human beings can only take so much, then, although putting in a disclaimer that she's Buddhist and would never harm another living being, veers into dangerous territory by seemingly empathizing with Cho.

The guy *might* have been autistic, but more importantly, he was SICK. It's like comparing apples to mushrooms.