Passion in a relationship

Post Reply New Topic

Hi everyone.

So, I read somewhere (and this applies to me) that usually autistic people have a longer period of passion in a relationship, when compared to NT people. This is starting to be a problem for me because I'm in a relationship and, while the other person has already passed the phase of passion, I'm still in it. Which means, for instance, that I want to be with her all the time, I want her to show me that she really loves me like in the beginning but, of course, this is not easy for her because, although I have no doubt that she loves me, she can't fake or give me what I want just because I'm yet to overcome the phase of passion. This was always the problem in my past relationships but I really want this relationship to work. And this is not facilitated by the fact that I don't have any friends or close family.

Does anyone have any advice?

If I marry somebody, I would want my wife to maintain her PASSION for the rest of our natural lives. And perhaps even thereafter.

I can empathize with what you are saying.

I think passion varies within people with autism. Sometimes, it's "too strong." Other times, it's virtually nonexistent.

I am married--and the passion has ebbed for both of us. We're now in a "mature" relationship.

I would have preferred it, though, if the PASSION remained.

I would want my woman to want to ravage me even when I'm 75 or so!

(Please remember: My wife would be "my woman." And I would be my wife's "man." )

I'd be interested to know who claimed that. I think it might be true, but it would be interesting to know how they came to that conclusion, and especially if they used scientific methods.



I've checked infatuation and attachment in NDs and NTs, and apparently NDs have stronger infatuations that last longer. There was also a period of time between half a year and a little over a year when obsessive thoughts appeared to drive a faster than normal attachment process. The flip side of it is that attachment in NDs decrease after a decade or so, while for NTs it's monotonously increasing.

I'd say passion (infatuation) typically will last about 2 years for me, but it depends on a few factors. So how long have you been together?

rdos, I think I read that same paper. We have been together for 6 months now, and the problems started to happen 2 weeks ago where we have some fights, usually because, in my mind, she's not doing enough in the relationship. However, if I stop and think about things a little bit more rational I usually understand her point. And I do think that all of this may due to my insecurities and my feelings.

One of the factors that appear to shorten an infatuation for me is to be together constantly. I'm able to hang on to it a lot longer if contact is more sporadic. So in that respect, your passion should at least get less intense quicker in your current arrangement.

Can't you just keep the passion more to yourself, and not involve her so much in it?