aspie with opposite traits?

Post Reply New Topic

Although I have an official DX of aspie, and my condition is as far from NT as anyone, I still feel that I do not fit in, even as aspie. A large part of the reason is that, although I know that this is a "spectrum" condition, some of my traits are not just non-aspie, but are actually the extreme opposite. (an example of a condition with an opposite trait could be someone diagnosed with, say, Down's syndrome, who has an IQ of 160.)

One example in me would be that in Asperger, they say concrete intelligence tends to be higher than abstract intelligence, but in me, my abstract intelligence is so much higher than my concrete intelligence as to be a social problem of its own. However, although Albert Einstein's abstract intelligence was abnormally high, he is still considered a possible aspie.

Another would be that, according to one source, an Aspie would find it easier to show love by buying a gift than by giving close affection, while I am the extreme opposite of that.

Is there anyone here who feels on the "wrong planet" who has a trait which is the opposite of Aspie?

^I sometimes don't think I'm an Aspie, since I'm quite different from a lot of people on this site.

Kuraudo777, there are three ways you can be different from the people here:
1.You are more NT than they are
2. You are at least just as different from NTs as they are, but in a different way
3. You are at least just as different from NTs as they are, but in the opposite direction in some ways.

Although this thread is about #3, I would be interested in how you are different from them in any way.

I respectfully disagree with the classification, because I see rules, numbers, and systems as abstractions.

I associate the word concrete, with hardness, mass, or physical substance.

And, I don't associate the indeterminacy of NT people with either of these.

I like giving hugs and kisses, but I only like receiving them from people I know, because of how sensitive I am to people's emotions and being touched in general.

They say aspies have an attention to detail, but I'm the exact opposite of that. I never notice details.

The traits often depends on one's level of Life-Experiences. I have much more life-experience than the majority of Aspies and so I will tend to also be much different and do a lot more of the unexpected than what you might from from either another Aspie and certainly not considered Neuro-Typical. Not really sure the best way to explain it but, the more survival-pressure you experience, provided that it does not drive you into killing yourself or forcing you into a permanently bad situation, the more you are forced into a kind of what I might have to call a psychological-evolution. Try comparing a lot of the things that I have posted with a lot of the things that other W-P have posted; you will usually see a huge difference and many stark-contrasts; I am also very aware that there are probably many younger or less-experienced Aspies who follow my posts just because I might seem to them like something of an older or more-experienced version of themselves...

It would be ridiculous to diagnose on traits like that alone, such as showing affection.

Like " well your child is nonverbal,cannot make eye contact, has repetitive movement, insists upon routines and has serious executive functioning issues but he gives you hugs so hE CANT be autistic"

I know how you feel sometimes though. I was a very huggy child and always tried and played with other kids, but just because I WANT to be with people, doesn't mean I'm good at socializing even on a basic level.

Hi Zylon,

The more Aspies I've gotten to know in person, the more I've realized that we do share some core traits, but the way we deal with those traits can be hugely different. I suppose I'm referring to observations about things that are more related to behavior than concrete abilities, but some of them might still apply.

For instance, I have a hard time reading people's body language and I have a lot of social anxiety/fear of bothering people, so I tend to be pretty quiet in social situations. I instinctively try to avoid anxiety by becoming as invisible as possible. If I can go out for coffee with classmates and listen to them talk to each other, without saying a word myself, that's often good enough for me.
On the other hand, I have an Aspie friend that also struggles with reading people and anxiety, but she is naturally more outgoing. When she feels anxious, she copes by becoming extremely talkative. She wants to escape her anxiety too, so she distracts herself from it by throwing herself into lively interaction. Same predicament, polar opposite ways of handling it.
When she's in sensory overload, she seeks comfort from others - asks friends to hold her hand, give her a big hug, generally hold her until she's feeling better. When I'm in sensory overload, I pity the person who comes within ten feet of me! When we're both overloaded, it's pretty awful, because she wants me to comfort her and I want to attack anything that tries to come near me. I just have to set her up with a cup of tea and a blanket or something and go away for some "me time" in another room so I don't blow my top, which she totally would not deserve.
I think a big difference between us is that I'm an introvert, and she's an extrovert. In some ways we're absolutely polar opposites. In fact sometimes it is really hard to relate to each other, especially regarding physical touch. Nonetheless, those who know what they're looking for can identify either of us as autistic pretty easily.

My main point is that we on the spectrum do share certain traits, yes, but we can express the traits in a myriad of ways. I think a lot of it depends not only on degree of severity, but also on personality, among other things. Just because you don't act like a "classically autistic person" doesn't necessarily mean you don't have underlying autistic traits. Don't discount your uniqueness as a person. I'm not saying you do, but I tend to discount mine a lot, and it ends up hurting me because I don't fit the autistic stereotype in some ways.

I have many... 'Contradictory traits' for an aspie.
I had posted a list why I can't relate to most aspies somewhere...

Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).

Lose more time here - Updates at least once a week.