so I've decided to leave Islam

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This is something I've been thinking about for a while now. Islam is the religion I was born with, it's the religion of my ancestors and it's something I take great pride in. But, I've decided that Islam does not properly reflect my values, I feel like I have less and less in common with my Muslim peers with every passing year. Very few of my friends are Muslim, and my boyfriend (and hopefully, my future husband?) is non-Muslim, so... I feel like the writing's on the wall, here. My last salah was a few days ago, so I am now officially an ex-Muslim.

That being said, Islam is much more than a religion; it is also a culture, and I feel that I am very much a cultural Muslim. I may stare wistfully at the sliver of a new moon in the night sky, and I might still keep a Quran on my bookshelf. I might even rock the hijab once in a while, on particularly windy days. But I won't identify myself with the religion and all that it entails (I hope that made sense, I'm sort of drunk right now). If God is truly merciful (and I think he is), he will understand why I've made this choice.

I thought about posting this in PPR, but I feel like it's a bit too personal not to post in Haven. Thanks for reading.

I can understand what you're going through. I have considered doing the same with Christianity, because of the fear of losing friends and being lumped with the extremists. So far, I have stuck with my faith, but try to remind people that I am very pragmatic and often passive with my beliefs.

My only advice for you is to do whatever you feel is best for you, not for anyone else.

As for the privacy situation, there is also the Members Only section.

Last edited by Tim_Tex on 23 Jan 2017, 1:06 am, edited 1 time in total.

I just hope you live in a place in the world, it is safe for you to do that. Be careful, okay?

One thing about Islam. Like Christianity and other religions, it has a decent value system whenever it is faithfully followed.

Unfortunately, in all religions, sometimes it is not faithfully followed, and much hurt results.

I hope you keep in contact with the good aspects of Islam.

Religion isn't for everyone.

I'll never be a Christian because from my perspective, it would require me to believe in magic. I'd rather not be part of it, than to live a lie.

But I can understand that for many people, the most difficult part of being non-religious is whether their families accept it or not. I know people whose families disowned them because of this, so it is a decision which is never to be made lightly.

FWIW, I don't put much trust in labels. If someone tells me they're Muslim or Christian or even non-religious or atheist, it tells me nothing about them except what they profess to believe. I need to know someone's character-- and that can only be gleaned by interacting and watching how they are with other people especially, as the saying goes, people that can do nothing for them.

To quote Marcus Aurelius:

Thanks for the replies, everyone. It was something I needed to get off my chest, and reading your words fills me with hope.

I do. I understand Islam has a reputation for being a difficult religion to leave, but I stopped going to mosque months ago and no one seems to care. I think as long as I don't speak against the religion or convert to Christianity, they won't bother me.

Best of luck.

As a lifelong atheist, I won't pretend to know what leaving a religion feels like, but always remember that religion holds no monopoly on the numinous.

Congratulations.

I am glad you came to your senses...finally.

I have left islam like 15 years before you, since 9/11.

It is unfortunate, all religions and even the non religious have fanatics of all sorts. I have never been more ashamed to be an American seeing this country succumb to fear and see it tear itself apart. It is from blowback long before 9/11. Our government doesn't seem to learn from meddling with foreign affairs.

I recall the 9/11, Bin laden's famous recorded speech and the rise of Al Qaeda was a wake up call for me to re-read the Qur'an carefully, I read it from cover to cover and I put it aside and i was like wtf did I just read.

Regardless whether the Qaeda was US creation or not, it doesn't change the fact what's there in the book and the hadith.

I hope things go well for you I can't imagine the strength it must have taken. From what I understand ex-Muslims face allot of stigma.

I understand Boo, just keep in mind fanatics permeate everything. They abuse, religion, they pervert whatever guise they use. The problem becomes when those that take it literally instead of figuratively begins to use it to hurt others rather than bring people together and love one another. I am an atheist, so please don't mistake my point as preaching. However, it gets old seeing those with no moral compass preach about having one and in the process mislead people looking for guidance.

I am atheist too now, but it happened gradually. I went through phases of denial, seeking for other explanations, theorizing...etc

And no, the day I realized I lost faith wasn't a happy day.

The idea of afterlife and god is comforting psychologically, I think most atheists know that.

I think the OP went through these phases, I remember I told her it's time to leave islam in some thread, I could see her values can't coexist wit her faith and it was waning already to that point.

I too went through a long process of losing what faith I had acquired as a child. I just hope Barchan is careful who she shares that type of information with. I personally have been disowned by distant relatives that wanted to force their will and personal beliefs on me. As I am sure you know all too well, that sort of information can wreak havoc on people's lives and the price can be very steep. I admire your courage Boo.