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ZachGoodwin
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24 Nov 2017, 10:13 pm

Whenever you make a mistake or whenever something bad happens to you try to not say life sucks because of that. Those problems are not your entire life. Your entire life can be built on many positive things that you are missing out on. Many positive things that you are unaware of. If you focus on thinking how much life sucks that will only make life suck even more.

See when we focus on something we move towards it, so if we focus on life getting better we move towards a life that is getting better. Okay when we tried to move towards a better life it suddenly gets worse. So? That's just a distraction; It's like dirt on a car, you can wash it off, or even a big dent in the car that can get fixed too. If the car is not working anymore then figuratively you are dead, so if you are alive then you must be going somewhere like a car that can still drive.

We can keep on moving. The next time we try to say life sucks, let's say life can get better.

Realistic optimism.



Raleigh
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24 Nov 2017, 10:37 pm

^ well said.


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Shakti
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24 Nov 2017, 10:50 pm

Keyword 'can', definitely. It's messed me up so much that people keep saying 'it'll be ok', like a broken record. Statements work better when they're not filled with false promises.


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k.wolf
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25 Nov 2017, 2:29 am

Sometimes when that happens I won't say that life sucks, and instead say that I suck. And I have a pile of evidence to back that up.
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nick007
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27 Nov 2017, 2:24 am

Saying Life Sux helps me feel better cuz it's a way for me to release frustration. It's kind of like yelling cursing when you accidentally hit your thumb with a hammer.


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27 Nov 2017, 2:31 am

When something bad happens, it helps me to speak freely about what went wrong and how I feel about it, very specifically. Alexithymia means this can take some time.

Broad negative generalizations are bad for my mental health, as well as pressure to be always positive. I think the key is in generalization. Better to talk specifically about things, and not try to construct a life philosophy out of something bad that happened to you.


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28 Nov 2017, 3:20 am

Indeed - but I have been told that you must be careful with emotional people when encouraging them to stay positive and realistic, because they interpret this as you telling them to "just get over it" and "invalidating feelings."
For instance if someone is having a hard time and says, as you note, that their life sucks and you respond the way you note above, they may interpret this as you not taking their feelings seriously or giving those feelings due consideration, and just behaving as if their feelings are insignificant.
At least, that's what I've been told.
You also must be careful you're not just in denial - insisting that everything is fine and wonderful when really it isn't, and acknowledging that it isn't may lead to you fixing the problem or getting assistance.
But as to saying life sucks - I also don't like others saying this to me, which they frequently do - "man it must suck to be you!" Or otherwise telling me all about how much harder I have it than others, how many problems I have in life compared to the norm, etc. I don't need to be told that. I just deal with what I have to, and make the best of that. I don't need to be told that it's much better for everyone else and my situation in life sucks.


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