Why do people keep saying it will be OK?? It will never be

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Shakti
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06 Dec 2017, 1:45 am

And I'm sick of hearing it. Unless I have proof that my life will ever get better, instead of continuously going downhill like it has been for the last 35 years, I just want to die. Seriously, f**k this world, if you don't keep your PTSD invisible and suffer in silence, they'll give you more to have PTSD about. f**k this world.


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Raleigh
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06 Dec 2017, 2:19 am

I agree.
Life often seems like one big s**thole.
No one can guarantee that life will get better, but my stubbornness keeps me going, I guess, and the people I love.


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ABZ
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06 Dec 2017, 3:09 pm

No one can guarantee your life will get better.

But it could, and if you end it you will never know. I suggest stick around for a while and find out.



leejosepho
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06 Dec 2017, 3:34 pm

I think something like "It'll be okay" usually really means something more like "You'll be okay", and then the challenge becomes that of actually being okay with whatever level or type of "okay" that might actually be. The pessimist might say "Life is hard and then we die" without ever being okay with that, but then the optimist might say the very same thing both while and as part of being "okay" for the duration.


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Scorpius14
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06 Dec 2017, 10:36 pm

a bit like that chocolate box metaphor that i'd rather not spell out, i've been through some deep depressive episodes throughout my teenage years and in my current 20's and i feel like i've gone through the worst of it but know that my life will get worse from here on, unless i win the lottery which won't happen since i stopped gambling for good.



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06 Dec 2017, 11:55 pm

The best indicator of the future is the past. I suppose you can change the way you react to the problems you encounter in life by learning new coping skills over time. I suppose my future is uncertain as well, but if I castrophize, worry about my future instead of being mindful and living in the moment, it will be as if whatever I fear down the road is already happening. I wouldn't be able to experience any happiness or meaning in my life if I did that.



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10 Dec 2017, 11:43 pm

Well yes, physically the whole of the universe/s and manifest reality is trending toward frozen decay. Doesn't mean you can't embrace it in the now, though.
I believe when people say "it'll be ok" they sometimes don't meant it literally - they are attempting to improve your feelings and comfort you. And that's a nice thing to do, so when people say this, they're being nice to you. Others being nice is a bonus, for a start.
And in fact life CAN get better and be ok eventually, if you can work out your current problems and learn to respond better to future problems. It's not an absolute impossibility that life can improve for you. But if you're dead, you'll never know. It can indeed be tempting to just proverbially throw up your hands and "f**k this world," but by a cruel sort of irony, if you go at it with this attitude the chances of things actually improving tend to drop steeply.


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Dragnet
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10 Dec 2017, 11:56 pm

C2V wrote:
Well yes, physically the whole of the universe/s and manifest reality is trending toward frozen decay. Doesn't mean you can't embrace it in the now, though.
I believe when people say "it'll be ok" they sometimes don't meant it literally - they are attempting to improve your feelings and comfort you. And that's a nice thing to do, so when people say this, they're being nice to you. Others being nice is a bonus, for a start.
And in fact life CAN get better and be ok eventually, if you can work out your current problems and learn to respond better to future problems. It's not an absolute impossibility that life can improve for you. But if you're dead, you'll never know. It can indeed be tempting to just proverbially throw up your hands and "f**k this world," but by a cruel sort of irony, if you go at it with this attitude the chances of things actually improving tend to drop steeply.


If your dead and everyone will be dead eventually, youll never know that life did improve for you at some point when you were alive because your dead. Also, I disagree, people can forgive you but they can never forget so even if your facing current problems and things get better, you can never ignore a past that could come back at any minute so, yes life can improve but no life will never be OK as OP stated.



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11 Dec 2017, 12:10 am

Dragnet wrote:
C2V wrote:
Well yes, physically the whole of the universe/s and manifest reality is trending toward frozen decay. Doesn't mean you can't embrace it in the now, though.
I believe when people say "it'll be ok" they sometimes don't meant it literally - they are attempting to improve your feelings and comfort you. And that's a nice thing to do, so when people say this, they're being nice to you. Others being nice is a bonus, for a start.
And in fact life CAN get better and be ok eventually, if you can work out your current problems and learn to respond better to future problems. It's not an absolute impossibility that life can improve for you. But if you're dead, you'll never know. It can indeed be tempting to just proverbially throw up your hands and "f**k this world," but by a cruel sort of irony, if you go at it with this attitude the chances of things actually improving tend to drop steeply.


If your dead and everyone will be dead eventually, youll never know that life did improve for you at some point when you were alive because your dead. Also, I disagree, people can forgive you but they can never forget so even if your facing current problems and things get better, you can never ignore a past that could come back at any minute so, yes life can improve but no life will never be OK as OP stated.

That depends on you. You can reorient your mind and come to a better understanding of the past, resolve your emotional issues with it, and be "ok" with what happened one way or another.
But that's just my opinion. I'm not one of those people who believe it correct to jump on the "yes everything sucks and it will always suck, so you should just go and kill yourself right now" bandwagon. :wink:


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11 Dec 2017, 12:31 am

Shakti wrote:
And I'm sick of hearing it. Unless I have proof that my life will ever get better, instead of continuously going downhill like it has been for the last 35 years, I just want to die. Seriously, f**k this world, if you don't keep your PTSD invisible and suffer in silence, they'll give you more to have PTSD about. f**k this world.


PTSD is a terrible thing, I myself hate it so much....Uhh due to that from time to time I end up listening to a song that reminds me of the trauma only to cry to it. A lot of people would not understand but doing this once a year to deal with the trauma actually helps me quite a bit.

I mean with PTSD even when life 'get's better' it can be hard to recognize it and have any confidence that maybe you are finally at least trying to do things right. I mean everything can be going great yet you might feel severe depression while keeping on an act of being ok. Or feel like everyone is staring at you... A while back I accepted that maybe due to it I may not feel positive emotions as easily as non PTSD people...I mean trying to enjoy something while feeling totally empty and like something even minor could cause a meltdown of some kind. It's not a fun disease at all...and some people may take for granted that certain situations don't trigger them into fight or flight mode.

I hate it a lot, but what can I do...I have PTSD sometimes things are going to trigger it and cause me to act weird, I can't help that I mean I can certainly do activities that could be work related, but stress is a major trigger of setting of the PTSD symptoms I mean it is hard....but in the end 'who cares' Admit to being a victim you get stigma, trying to deny it you still get sigma...so what is the point of even exposing you have PTSD when half the culture still things any women who are sexually harmed 'asked for it'... pretty sure my sister at the age of 4 did not 'ask for it'.


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kraftiekortie
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11 Dec 2017, 7:00 am

You're a very smart lady. It could prove disastrous for many should you leave this world.

I'm not into nutrition--but who knows? Maybe one of your theories could save or extend peoples' lives.



HistoryGal
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12 Dec 2017, 8:11 pm

I won't tell you everything will be ok. Lived long enough to know how sh***y things can be.



kraftiekortie
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12 Dec 2017, 8:52 pm

Things can be shitty----but things can be good, too....within the s**t.



HistoryGal
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12 Dec 2017, 10:31 pm

I have a pragmatic take on life. No sunshine and rainbows.


LOL only for those special lil people who seem to be insulated from reality. We,all know a few of those.



kraftiekortie
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12 Dec 2017, 10:46 pm

It ain't me, Babe (also the name of a song).



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15 Dec 2017, 1:12 am

I tell people I'm not interested in hearing that phrase because it's essentially meaningless, if they expand upon why they feel that way, even if it's just their way of informingme they hope it'll turn out reasonably because they think I am deserving of that rather than a harsher fate, that's acceptable but they should have started out saying they hope it would be okay, as we both know the world doesn't give a single diaper about what control any of us assume we have of disjointed developments bleeding into the horned horizons.