How and where do I find a boyfriend?

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WolvesandDogs
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03 Jun 2018, 10:21 pm

I was wondering how people even find relationships to begin with. I am 21, and I have been single as single can be for my entire life. I just don’t get what I am doing wrong. I was not ready to date until a few years ago and when I decided I was ready for a relationship, no one has come my way. Do I need to seek out a boyfriend? I do not know how dating works. I understand how other people find relationships, but I do not know how to get into a relationship myself.

I am not looking for a fickle fleeting love that will be there one day and gone the next. I am searching for that person that I can spend the rest of my life with. You know, be friends, then date, and eventually get married. I want someone that will be there for the rest of my life, and I do not know where to find him.

This is something difficult for me to deal with. I want to have loving feelings for someone, and I want to be in a relationship. I just do not know how.

I wish that God would lead the person who he wants me to be with my way. I believe in God, and I’d like someone that could share that belief with me, or at least accept it.

I feel like I should be in a relationship by now. I have tried Match and failed. Where do you think I should go to find someone? I am a nice girl. I want to wait until marriage to... you know. I want to be in a caring relationship with a guy that likes me for me. I must be doing something wrong because I do not believe I am undesirable. I am comfortable with who I am, but I can’t even tell if a guy will like me. Any advice?



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03 Jun 2018, 10:57 pm

You can find a romantic partner anywhere, but the best chance of finding someone like-minded, is when you are out, doing what you love. You can also meet people through networking (a friend, or family member knows someone), but this isn't always a good idea, because I have found that the person doing the matchmaking likes to fix you up with someone that they think would be a good match, and they have a tendency to meddle in between the two of you. Also, if it doesn't work out, then you have to deal with a barrage of questions from said matchmaker (ask me how I know :)).



Last edited by SilverStar on 03 Jun 2018, 11:53 pm, edited 1 time in total.

cberg
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03 Jun 2018, 11:25 pm

I regret to inform you you might've just found thousands.


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WolvesandDogs
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04 Jun 2018, 12:45 am

cberg wrote:
I regret to inform you you might've just found thousands.

I thought about that before I posted. I decided that it was worth the risk.



modernmax
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04 Jun 2018, 1:16 am

The waiting until marriage is a universal turnoff for every guy out there.


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Mudboy
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04 Jun 2018, 2:05 am

modernmax wrote:
The waiting until marriage is a universal turnoff for every guy out there.

Only for the shallow loser guys.


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Closet Genious
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04 Jun 2018, 2:11 am

Mudboy wrote:
modernmax wrote:
The waiting until marriage is a universal turnoff for every guy out there.

Only for the shallow loser guys.


A bit harsh don't you think?

I can definitely respect a girl who wants to wait until marriage, only if she is a virgin however.



Wolfram87
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04 Jun 2018, 2:16 am

From the sound of it, church might work. If not church itself, maybe some church-arranged social activities or events?


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The_Face_of_Boo
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04 Jun 2018, 2:16 am

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04 Jun 2018, 2:32 am

modernmax wrote:
The waiting until marriage is a universal turnoff for every guy out there.


incredibly incorrect post.


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04 Jun 2018, 2:33 am

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Wolfram87
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04 Jun 2018, 3:10 am

Mudboy wrote:
modernmax wrote:
The waiting until marriage is a universal turnoff for every guy out there.

Only for the shallow loser guys.


I'd consider waiting til marriage to be an unacceptable caveat; promising to enter an exclusive sexual relationship with someone whom you don't know if you're sexually compatible with strikes me as a needless gamble with no upside. But I guess I'm just a "shallow loser" who thinks sexual intimacy is an important part of a relationship, or something...


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nick007
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04 Jun 2018, 3:37 am

I met all 3 of my girlfriends on online forums. I met my 2nd & current one on this forum. You might could find a guy here OP if your willing to do the long-distance thing for a while. I did & I relocated from Louisiana to Vermont to be with my current girlfriend. I also 2nd the idea about looking in church or church related things since you are religious & want to wait till marriage to have sex.


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04 Jun 2018, 10:25 am

Closet Genious wrote:
Mudboy wrote:
modernmax wrote:
The waiting until marriage is a universal turnoff for every guy out there.

Only for the shallow loser guys.


A bit harsh don't you think?

I can definitely respect a girl who wants to wait until marriage, only if she is a virgin however.

My reply was extremely mild compared to the sick statement I was responding to. If I heard a guy say something like that to my daughter or nieces, I would go postal.

She could meet people by joining hobby groups. Making male friends is the first step...


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WolvesandDogs
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04 Jun 2018, 11:31 am

modernmax wrote:
The waiting until marriage is a universal turnoff for every guy out there.

It is not a turnoff for the decent ones. I’d much rather wait for a guy that has strong morals even if it takes a whole lot longer to find them.



Last edited by WolvesandDogs on 04 Jun 2018, 11:59 am, edited 1 time in total.