"I can hear you over here," touches my buttons

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Hi:
I don't know if this is the right place or not to post this but since it falls into social skills, I sometimes get too excited and talk loud. Though I appreciate feedback from other people letting me know that I need to keep my voice down, I cannot STAND it when someone throws in "I can hear you over here," it has always ticked me off. Look at get it, you tell me to keep my voice down because I am not dumb.

Do they get in your face and scream at you?

Can everybody else in the room hear you talk?

Does it really bother you that much to be reminded that there are other people in the world, and that they do no appreciate being rudely bombarded with someone else's conversation?

I thought NTs talk unnecessarily loud all the time. When I'm on the bus people often have a conversation so loud that the whole bus begins to know their life story.
But when an Aspie does it....

I get it. Its like when people say, "you're welcome," when you are so preoccupied you forgot to say thank you.

Passive aggressiveness really pushes my buttons.

I can hardly resist an opportunity to push those buttons RIGHT back, my go-to response being "I can hear you too!" in the most deadpan way possible.

I accepted the fact that I have minimal social skills around 50 years ago. But I found a good solution to this weakness. I married an extreme extrovert. She has all the social skills one would ever want. And I give her full reigns on correcting me anytime my actions break the social rules. Normally she does this with a quick jab to the ribs. So from my perspective - I do not need to learn social skills PERIOD. I only listen to my wife anytime she brings it to my attention.

She is doing a fine service for me. So I listen to her but not necessarily to any other criticism thrown my way. She has my back. The only other exception was my boss at work. I interpreted his by default as "constructive criticism".

As an Aspie, I have been bullied and psychologically abused for many years. As a result, I never accept criticism at face value. It is difficult to determine whether something said is in the spirit of destructive criticism or constructive criticism. That is why hearing something like "I can hear you over here" may automatically release a knee jerk reaction. But a knee jerk reaction can cascade into unintended consequences, especially if the person who made the critical remarks, made them for your own benefit, in the spirit of friendship. It is a way to burn bridges, really fast. It can destroy friendships, future potential friendships or just kind hearted souls.