Making friends or interests: which one do you Value more?

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Making friends or interests: which one do you Value more?

I have many more interests than friends.

Interests. All my closest friends have the same interests as I do. Not in everything but in one interest I can talk to them about a lot.
It's also true in a less stereotypical way (which I'm not sure was meant at all). I like making interests. I've got a few which I'm obsessed with and for decades on end: politics and philosophy, books, psychology, football. Then I'm interested in almost anything, so long as someone can convince me (whether in video form/written form/spoken form).
What I do find dull is people without hobbies and interests who merely want to do small talk.

Friends.

Interests. I enjoy some friends, but friendship can become so taxing. The fewer the better. With interests, it's the opposite. And I love learning about interests. Trying to learn about friendship is confusing--it will always be an alien language, except maybe with someone like me, where we could just be very clear and direct with each other.

I definitely like having interests, but I enjoy having friends, too. I like to be in the company of people who are interested in things as well.

My special interest are my friends. My few actual human friends are only my friends because they share my special interests in some way or another. When interest change, we usually stop being friends. I know that might make me sound like a horrible person, that's just the way it is. I had to suffer through people who liked things that I did not like and people who did not like the things I liked as a kid, I don't have to put up with that s*** as an adult.

Definitely interests.

I've always had very few of each. I'm pretty boring. I'm not sure which one I value more. I guess it depends on what the interest is & who the friend is.

IF they didn't help my interests in the first place they wouldn't be my friend in the first place.

both

interest.

friends are one "miscommunication" away from an "unfortunate thing that happened".

almost all previous friends have dumped me sooner or later.

one of them, 2011, i have obsessed over, for over seven years and counting.

but she did not do anything dramatic, creative, original, or extreme.

she was just "being yourself". (being herself), by being impatient, self important, judgmental. selfish.

there are a lot of things that i kind of think, go, or should go, without saying. for precious lil "Friends".

but the statement (marked in ), is not a law, a fact, or anyone's opinion. just my own.

and maybe i am unreasonable. there is no objective method to find out.

but even if i was reasonable, the friendship has to be mutual. two way street. either party can end the friendship at any time for any reason.

friendships are not subject to Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.

if someone does not want to be my precious lil "friend", because they are homophobic or whatever, they can do that.





having said that, right now, i have about two interests. and about three friends. of them, one moved to a different state in july. and i write him FaceBook messages. long ones. the icon says "read", but no response. but i feel guilty because i have (had) nothing to offer him positively. he taught aikido for seven years and i took his lessons. it was a nonprofit organization and i paid zero. so i ought to count myself fortunate or lucky that he did not take vengeance upon me.

the other friend, sometimes i e-mail and he sometimes answers. but no face to face interaction except when i see him at trader joes or something.

the other friend, i see about 2x a week at aikido. but of course, if she gets struck by a car, or if she does not want to interact with me anymore, then i go from 1 to 0 friends, and she goes from 100 to 99 friends.

in that way (among others), it is not, and could never be, a level playing friend.

could use more interests and friends though.

clinical depression.

do not feel like doing anything all day long. eating, sleeping, internet, longfuck walks. library.

there is nothing i like to do and nothing i am good at.

Theory of Multiple Intelligences

Dewey Decimal System

constantly just waiting for the next meal or snack

nothing positive to show for it

among the Theory of Multiple Intelligences, my best one is math and the second best is english. but they were not that great anyways so what the flying f**k ever.

brain feels so dissociated, it is like, brain damage.

I value more friends.
But working on my interests while avoiding to make enemies, has unfortunately always been more rewarding.

Making friends is too ideal of a goal to be practical

But if I could make friends, I would value friends more than interests

Making friends for me is not something realistic or tangible to me at this point I'll stick with interests