Confirmed I have severe self image and confidence issues

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I finally got an appointment to see counselling to speak about my self image problems and after a couple of appointments I have been diagnosed with having severe self image problems.

I spoke about how I hate my body and I pretty much only feel any way worthy when my partner showers me with affection which I constantly crave. Then I talked about how when i'm away from my partner I get depressed like when I'm at work I count the minutes down till I am cuddling him.

I did mention that I am not under any form of abuse but rather he worships me and I said that when he showers me with affection I feel positive and when I'm been cuddled I feel happy in fact when he lies me down and plays with my hair it's in my view the ultimate form of happiness.

I also have nightmares about been alone and unloved and I need to be cuddled when I sleep. I did mention that we appear to have a normal and healthy sex life though my partners injuries means it's limited at this moment.

The last thing is that I cannot seem to forgive myself for past faults like I believe that I am the cause of my partner's seizures not only coming back as before we moved in he was seizure free for 4 years and I got us into debt as I didn't have any life skills and I twice cheated once when drunk and was off the rails and the second time feeling rejected and I slept with my lesbian friend again my partner has promised to forgive me but I can't forgive myself and i find myself in a constant state of blame.

My counsellor said that I have severe body and self worth issues and maybe having issues with my sexuality due to my two affairs been same sex and I place such little value upon myself which is why I crave love and affection from my partner on a constant basic. but the counsellor is asking if she can speak to my partner with me but i'm scared cause I don't think he knows how damaged I am and i'm scared I try talking to my partner but I don't think it sinks in how much damage I have mentally.

As i'm writing this I just want to lie in bed and have my partner spoon around me and snuggle and stroke my hair this morning I nearly had a meltdown simply because he had to leave early for hospital treatment.

I think getting coherent treatment is the best gift you can give your partner.

I have self-worth issues, too. Not as severe as yours but I come from a family of people with self-worth issues.

The best you can give to your partner is healthy You. A lot of work but worth it

It may also help to have a creative hobby, in which you actually make something. Such as sewing or gardening that gives you a tangible result from your efforts.

"self image problems" sounds, to me, like it is not in the Diagnosic statistical manual.

What is the diagnosis?


You can't measure your value.

Your value is just, at that time, to whom, in what way


Plenty of precious lil "people" act like, confidence not proportional to competence

Even the exchange rate of monetary currency fluctuates every day


Psychobabble


This is just my stupid lil opinion, not a fact. Not a social norms. So many precious lil "people" act so full of themselves, and there are too many of them. That someone not so full of themselves can't function. Outnumbered.

Well made the decision i managed to get my partner involved and he attended a session with me today.

Probably will cause issues between me as I had to retell the two times I cheated and what pushed me to cheat. I wish I could have blamed it on s high sex drive but I couldn't.

Guess I'll see how it goes

Great decision!
Being honest may hurt but it leads to solutions