What is masking?
ASPartOfMe
Veteran
Joined: 25 Aug 2013
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 34,478
Location: Long Island, New York
04 Jun 2019, 5:22 pm
AquaineBay wrote:
I'm not convinced with the definitions of "masking" in relation to Autism. Many state hiding things and mimicking and learning behavior but, to me that's just a natural thing everybody does regardless of what you have.
I always want to ask: How do you willingly mask a disorder? I can mask things about myself that I don't want people to know(which everyone does) but I never "masked" my autism. I didn't really get along with others, I feel no connection to many people. I say things that are inappropriate and not understand why they are wrong or need for it to be explained and it just happens, I don't "mask" or anything. I can "mask" the things that I do such as rocking(though I get a burning itch for me to start doing it again) but as far as how I interact with people and the things I say it just happens.
I always want to ask: How do you willingly mask a disorder? I can mask things about myself that I don't want people to know(which everyone does) but I never "masked" my autism. I didn't really get along with others, I feel no connection to many people. I say things that are inappropriate and not understand why they are wrong or need for it to be explained and it just happens, I don't "mask" or anything. I can "mask" the things that I do such as rocking(though I get a burning itch for me to start doing it again) but as far as how I interact with people and the things I say it just happens.
In general autistic people have to mask more things, more core parts of themselves, more often than neurotypical people in order to fit in. Some autistics cannot be successful doing this, others can do it but it is exhausting and leads to burnout, for others constantly hiding core parts of themselves makes them feel broken and depressed. For many NT people for whom this is generally less stressful the rewards will make masking a net positive.
_________________
Professionally Identified and joined WP August 26, 2013
DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity
It is Autism Acceptance Month
“My autism is not a superpower. It also isn’t some kind of god-forsaken, endless fountain of suffering inflicted on my family. It’s just part of who I am as a person”. - Sara Luterman
04 Jun 2019, 11:57 pm
ASPartOfMe wrote:
AquaineBay wrote:
I'm not convinced with the definitions of "masking" in relation to Autism. Many state hiding things and mimicking and learning behavior but, to me that's just a natural thing everybody does regardless of what you have.
I always want to ask: How do you willingly mask a disorder? I can mask things about myself that I don't want people to know(which everyone does) but I never "masked" my autism. I didn't really get along with others, I feel no connection to many people. I say things that are inappropriate and not understand why they are wrong or need for it to be explained and it just happens, I don't "mask" or anything. I can "mask" the things that I do such as rocking(though I get a burning itch for me to start doing it again) but as far as how I interact with people and the things I say it just happens.
I always want to ask: How do you willingly mask a disorder? I can mask things about myself that I don't want people to know(which everyone does) but I never "masked" my autism. I didn't really get along with others, I feel no connection to many people. I say things that are inappropriate and not understand why they are wrong or need for it to be explained and it just happens, I don't "mask" or anything. I can "mask" the things that I do such as rocking(though I get a burning itch for me to start doing it again) but as far as how I interact with people and the things I say it just happens.
In general autistic people have to mask more things, more core parts of themselves, more often than neurotypical people in order to fit in. Some autistics cannot be successful doing this, others can do it but it is exhausting and leads to burnout, for others constantly hiding core parts of themselves makes them feel broken and depressed. For many NT people for whom this is generally less stressful the rewards will make masking a net positive.
My question is: How do you mask what you don't understand? If you can mask something then wouldn't that mean you understand it in some way or the concept behind it? My social skills aren't good and the only way I could "mask" it is by not doing it at all. The basics I can get but, once the advanced parts come in I'm lost. It's like being bad at math, you can't mask being bad at it cause if you don't understand the equation and concept behind it then it will show.
Examples:
Greeting people: Basic
Understanding levels of friendship: Advanced
Talking to someone: Basic
Appropriate things to say depending on relation to the person: Advanced
Gestures and Eye Contact: Basic
Length of Eye Contact and communicating correct Gestures at appropriate time: Advanced
Knowing Boundaries: Basic
Where do the boundaries start and where does it end: Advanced
_________________
Autism is a disorder not a personality trait!
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and Wisdom to know the difference."
