Having a social event at the same time

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I had planned to have an end of the summer bbq this weekend and I had sent it out about three weeks ago. The next thing I know, I find out that one of my guests who said he coming decided to have host a video game at his house that night. Because of that, some of the people I wanted to have at my bbq are going to be at his house. I am mad at him for hogging this opportunity but maybe he just forgot.

When you accept an invitation, you GO unless you are in dire circumstances (death in the family, illness etc.) That way this sort of thing doesn't happen. Your friend should at the very least, apologize. You of course, need not ever invite him to anything again if you so choose.

He didn't tell me yes or no on the invite, but he did tell me that he was thinking about bringing some wine and anything else. He did apologize to me for forgetting and scheduling the video game night. I told him that he could come later but he said because he is doing the video game night, he will be on a tight budget. We are getting together next weekend and he said he would make it up to me by getting me a food of my choice. I have an idea from that but I need to ask him.

I am just sad because some of my friends made plans to attend video game night so they will not be able to join me

This is the reason I'm afraid to host my own party. I'm too sensitive and wouldn't be able to deal with the hurt if people I have invited decide they have better things to do than to attend a party organised by Joe90. (I won't be hurt if something unfortunate or something beyond their control happened, that's different).

I am not keen on parties so I would not host one. But a scenic get together would be ok...

I have faced plenty of situations like that and I have no problem inviting people on the spectrum or with disabilities. Yet, if an NT is invited, they refuse.

One example was the housewarming party, which I have talked about before in which no one from my old job acknowledged or attended. This situation breaks my heart and it makes me feel angry.

On the other hand, I have had people attend my parties out of obligation. On such case is an ex-friend who came to my gatherings and didn't want to be there and faked it the whole time. She was extremely self-absorbed and so anything involving her life was way more important. This was though she kept telling me, "I love you like a sister."

During the same housewarming party that my co-workers snubbed, she had agreed to help me get set up and be with me throughout the day. At the last minute, she decided to run off and buy her wedding dress before showing up late. She and her husband, along with another friend only stayed for an hour. Then when they were leaving, I saw them sneaking out. She looked like she was happy to be leaving too. When I asked her about it, "My fiancee wanted to leave and we wanted to pay my dad back for the dress" I confronted her for breaking her promise. "I needed to be with my fiancee."