Do more autistic people feel less lonely?

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19 Aug 2019, 5:14 am

I've wondered...



renaeden
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19 Aug 2019, 5:42 am

I'm very rarely lonely, there's always something to do by myself. Reading is a big one, so is housework. I lived alone for about 3 years in my 20s, loved every minute of it. Everything was decorated to my satisfaction. It was only due to mental illness that I had to move back in with my parents.



kraftiekortie
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19 Aug 2019, 5:45 am

I can feel pretty lonely sometimes.

I tend to feel the most lonely when I’m around a lot of people.



Joe90
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19 Aug 2019, 6:13 am

No. As a teenager I was so lonely, that I often cried. Loneliness even made me do things that were out of character for me. I'm not so lonely these days.


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19 Aug 2019, 7:04 am

I was extremely lonely in my preteens and early teens.
At 17, I used to dial automatic customer service to hear a human voice that wouldn't be hostile.
Now I'm not lonely at all, a family of four is even a bit too much for me to love.


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19 Aug 2019, 7:36 am

Being autistic doesn't make one less lonely within a less 'fulfilling' social life.
Being asocial, however... More so likely.

What are the odds of autistics being asocial?
That is, if asociality isn't from crappy social circumstances due to developmental delays and differences denying said social fulfillments.
I don't believe one simply is asocial all because they suck at socializing or appearing to be like it -- therefore they they claim they don't feel lonely mainly because of lack of fulfillment. That's like claiming you're asexual because you're squeamish of touch or the idea of sex, or worse deprived and frustrated -- when you actually do have a sense of attraction and do felt attraction towards anything.



In my whole life, I never felt lonely.
I'm socially fulfilled, I know how to appreciate and enjoy relationships. But that just what 'happened' -- confirming that I'm no misanthrope.
Yet I don't not 'crave' the fulfillment to begin with. I'm not really interested nor driven to be.

If I already have the drive, I would've more 'lenient' and more willing to support anyone. I would've been more involved; I simply chose not to.
Would've taken most the lonely souls in this forum and make those twice shy ones meet. That's what I would've done if being social is ever my priority.


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EzraS
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19 Aug 2019, 8:21 am

I enjoy solotude.



Fnord
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19 Aug 2019, 8:29 am

Less lonely than what?


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19 Aug 2019, 8:43 am

I was very lonely just a few years ago. Now I have a varied social life with a lot of activities. However, in terms of finding love, I'm still very much alone.



Oraq
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19 Aug 2019, 9:24 am

I enjoy good company, which includes being by myself, so loneliness is seldom a problem. As others have noted, the only periods when I experienced anything of the sort was when surrounded by other people.



Joe90
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19 Aug 2019, 10:59 am

Fnord wrote:
Less lonely than what?


Than NTs, I suppose.


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ASPartOfMe
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19 Aug 2019, 11:27 am

Considering the high rates of suicide ideation and depression among autistics I would say in general a much higher percentage of autistics feel lonely and more intense loneliness than neurotypicals.


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Antrax
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19 Aug 2019, 12:59 pm

I certainly get lonely, but whether I get more or less lonely than others I really cannot say.


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BenderRodriguez
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19 Aug 2019, 1:23 pm

Oraq wrote:
I enjoy good company, which includes being by myself, so loneliness is seldom a problem. As others have noted, the only periods when I experienced anything of the sort was when surrounded by other people.

There's a saying that those who hate being by themselves are in bad company :wink:

Joking aside, I too enjoy both solitude and the company of a few select people. But I'm not sure the OP is right, a lot of people here seem to suffer severely due to loneliness.


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kraftiekortie
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19 Aug 2019, 1:26 pm

Yeah. Many people here do suffer from loneliness.

They are human beings as well as people with autism/Asperger's.



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19 Aug 2019, 1:33 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

I tend to feel the most lonely when I’m around a lot of people.


^ This


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