Can’t stop feeling depressed

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A day does not go by without me feeling depressed. Even when I am driving a car to go somewhere, sitting in the college course I paid for, or checking out items to a library patron, I think about what gets me down. I can’t put aside things I am told I can’t do anything about and turn my focus on to things I could potentially change for the better because I am still thinking about what I don’t have. This has gone on since I was 17 and it gets worse with every passing year.

The only thing I can say to this----is that you have to try to make yourself think of the things you HAVE, rather than the things you DON'T HAVE.

I wish others can inspire you, others can help you---but they can only do either to a certain extent. And they can only do it if you also take steps alongside what they are doing.

I wish I could wave a magic wand and change the emphasis you have within your thoughts---but I can't do that.

I would agree with you if you said "it's easier said than done."

But it's better to have the notion that you could change your thought pattern--than not to have the notion at all.

This may not be useful to you, but KUDOS to you for having awareness. During my ASD assessment last week I said to my dr, "I know how to behave, I just can't get there!" (regarding a change of plans that upset me) He suggested that my depression was from Frustration (with communication, with Executive Function, etc.). So I take it that's what is next for me: tools for those things to curb my Frustration (Depression).

What avenues have you tried? Cognitive, meditative, therapeutic, medicative, etc? I have a letter from college documenting when my good days starting to be more frequent than my bad days. I am not clear if it was circumstantial, medication or behavioral that turned the tide for me. As usual the answer is probably YES (all of them). Wishing you find what gets you to more better than worse.

I have tried the four things you’ve listed. They become undone because of my control freak mother, my redneck father, my redneck stepfather, and the anti-intellectual pro-Jesus fanc club people who live in my area.

^^
Were any of those helpful before they were undone? (which I take to mean you stopped them, or do you mean they were not helpful b/c the outside pressure/control is too great?)

Would having a cat help?

I would get a spark of hope but it would get stomped out soon after.

Both a psychiatrist and my younger brother want me to try ECT or TMS.

It’s easy to be depressed when you’re smart. So even the you’re down you can walk through life knowing you’re smarter then all the dumb people that are depressing you. That is at least something to be proud of.

That's similar to my fear. Mine is being squooshed.

In my situation, I am either happy, or I am not. I don't really sit in the middle on that. My being happy is "too much" for many folks. It seems like being not happy (depressed) is more socially acceptable than being happy and "inappropriate". Of course being happy means I sometimes put off what I need to do b/c it's uncomfortable... sigh.

Depression is considered shameful at best and Satanic at worst in the Bible Belt.



Rednecks, bible thumpers, and ghetto thugs would scream at and physically harm me just for being myself.

Even at my age, I dislike doing homework even if it’s very important.

That's horrible, isn't it? I actually had an opportunity to be with a ghetto thug and we got along quiet fine: on neutral territory. It probably wouldn't go well if he'd been with his cronies. I don't think I'd mind rednecks or bible thumpers one-on-one, but the groups (bible gangs?) are daunting.

You must really feel alone where you live. God knows I felt alone at my redneck high school. They called me b***h. I’m still trying to figure out why.

The thugs I know call women “b*****s” and physically harass or even harm them. Rednecks do the same as well. I’ve been around “bible gangs” and they are extremely depressing. They guffaw about football, praise Trump, brandish guns, and gripe about how they hate liberals.

Rednecks will say stupid things like “The bybull says a womun is lessur than a man!” or “Wimmin are all crazy!” as well as consider being terrible to women a masculinity status. They don’t get how homoerotic they can sound.

^^ So I take you know that's all hogwash. So I take it that somehow you're in a place with mostly people like this and you can't get away, or you've internalized it? Yuck. For me at work it's like that but subtle and it's awful. Unbearable. I can't imagine living around most all day, most every day. Boo on toxic environments. I don't know that I could get better from within one. I definitely need outside perspectives!! !!