50/50 Reactions: Creepy/Weird vs. A Nice Person

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Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 23 May 2019
Age: 22
Gender: Male
Posts: 7
Location: PA

15 Nov 2019, 1:10 am

I've dealt with people who either thought of me as nice or creepy, I'll explain:

Before college (K-12), I struggled with staring at girls (when I was younger), not being able to connect with my classmates, along with missed social cues. This lead to me being judged from my behaviors, even though I've improved ever since then.

Fast forward to college, even though I found some people that I eventually got along with, I've been falsely labeled as a creep, weirdo, etc. (sometimes for no apparent reason)

When I attend college parties, I normally talk to people, only if I recognize them. If I start a conversation with someone new, then they'll either accept my invite or "excuse themselves to the bathroom" after talking to me for a few minutes, if you get what I'm saying.

I usually act calm & cool at college parties, along with not bringing too much attention towards myself. I also don't initiate conversations out of the blue, unless if I'm standing next to someone or waiting in the bathroom line. I basically just talk to people only if I feel like it. Yet, I still somehow get judged for little to no reason at all, even though I never act "inappropriate" towards anyone. It's probably a mix of my past mistakes, along with some of my high school alumni at my college.

In simpler terms, people react differently in certain situations, especially under the influence of drugs/alcohol. What may not seem like a big deal to me may be for them, vice versa.

Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 7 Dec 2019
Gender: Male
Posts: 169

07 Dec 2019, 10:27 pm

Hang out with the people who like you and not with the people you don't?
If you're not doing anything wrong, that seems like the best strategy. And I bet your social skills will get better and better with practice if you pay attention.

jimmy m

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jun 2018
Age: 71
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,897
Location: Indiana

07 Dec 2019, 11:04 pm

sta3535 wrote:
I've dealt with people who either thought of me as nice or creepy

From my perspective, many NTs quickly learn to read people and they do this by picking up clues by looking in their eyes. The eyes, eyelids, eyebrows and orbicularis oculi muscle play a major role in projecting emotions and the degree of emotions. But Aspies are not good at projecting these signals because we rarely look at people's eyes.

It seems like NTs are always misinterpreting Aspies intentions. They look us in the eyes and imagine our thoughts. Lately I have begun wearing blue tinted mirrored glasses. By wearing mirrored glasses I deprive them of this tool of assessing my intentions. Because these glasses only have a tint on the mirror finish, they are not true sunglasses and as a result, I can also wear them indoors.

I choose the color blue because that color projects: peaceful, tranquil and symbolizes loyalty. Blue is reliable and responsible. It exhibits inner security and confidence.

I am fairly pleased with the results. People treat me more friendly. I even have total strangers come up to me and begin conversations.

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