Reciprocal Kissing

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At some point I realized that I was uncomfortable with kissing because of the expectation of reciprocity. I mean that both people are supposed to be doing things with their mouths at the same time. To me it seems more natural to just be still so that I can enjoy someone kissing me.

Kissing back is ok I guess but kind of weird. I haven't been sure about how to coordinate the movement of my lips with the other person's kissing, and that's what made me feel like I didn't know how to kiss.

Can anyone relate to this? Just wanting to sit or lie still and be kissed at least some of the time or kissing someone while that person is still instead of kissing you back. Or just preferring to kiss a body part that doesn't involve reciprocity/two sets of flesh moving at the same time, like kissing someone's cheek, forehead, chin, neck, etc.

I relate somewhat. I don't like french kissing or even kissing on the lips due to sensory issues. I don't mind giving my girlfriend a kiss on the cheek or kissing other body parts like her arm or back or whatever thou. I like being kissed on my cheek OK I guess but I like it a little less on other body parts due to sensory issues. I'm very ticklish too. My girlfriend had to learn to tolerate this thou I try to kiss her on her cheek & other places fairly often & I'll occasionally kiss her on the lips & I'll let her kiss me other places than my cheek.

I don't tend to enjoy kissing, especially with tongue. I find it unpleasant in a sensory way.
I have enjoyed it before, but it's a rare occurrence and I usually don't like the way people kiss.

Fifty years ago, when I was in college, I had a girl who took pity on me and showed me how to kiss. She was from South America and the girls there are much more adept in that area. She explained to me all the different types of kissing such as the simple kiss, the French kiss, the truly romantic kiss, the kiss that leaves a mark (Hickey Kiss) and the kiss where you lock your jaws together. We practiced each technique.

But the most important kiss of all was the truly romantic kiss. The secret is that it is all done with the eyes. First you need to be alone and remain perfectly quiet. You need to look deep within their eyes until you can see the shadow of their soul, then you slowly move your faces together without breaking eye contact. And then kiss the girl on her lips. She demonstrated the technique and I could see her point. I would have never known, not in a million years.

Most of the types of kissing was alright. I hated the kiss where you locked your jaws together. But the truly romantic kiss was a winner. By far light years above the rest.

I thought the subject line referred to what we used to call (back in the 1960s) the "Candy Kiss" -- the two people so engaged would pass a Life Savers™ candy back and forth until it was gone.

My dad called it "swapping spit".

sounds weird and unpleasant

I think kissing is overrated - it is weird, mostly because I over analyse, but also because I'm only 5"2" so I usually need to stretch to kiss. But, when I allow myself I am a sensory seeker. Kissing can definitely help to make the outside world disappear when you make that connection.

Hmm, no. Just letting someone kiss me while I do nothing would feel too invasive. Like something is being done to me. I need to be a participant.

It is the definition of romantic.

As an Aspie, I rarely look into another persons eyes. But NTs use the eyes to determine if someone is friend or foe. They have learned this instinctively. As a young mother stares into her small infants eyes and the infant stares back, it creates a bonding experience. It releases an oxytocin hormonal chain that lets their guard down and bonds the mother and infant. The same chain also occurs between lovers when they share eye contact.