Socializing with people

Post Reply New Topic

I have this issue that I am having difficulty chatting with friends one on one, face to face. It's like it is always a one-way conversation (him talking, I listen), I can't really give out a response. I usually say something like (ok, sure, cool, interesting etc). Or I have something to say after awhile. But when we are texting, I find it is easier and I have more to say. I don't know if this is because I am too nervous or my brain is slow or I am not into talking whatever
So just wondering if I am that weird or anyone else have this issue?

Certainly real-life conversation can easily go out of control in my case. I've experienced being talked at like you have, and I've talked other people to death, and "proper" reciprocal conversation is something I don't seem to get very often. Texting is easier for me because I get more time to hone what I say into shape, and like you I'm a slow thinker. Real-life social interactions are often just too fast for me. The best conversations I remember have been when both myself and the other person (never more than one or it gets too complicated) have a fairly deep, long-winded style (though not too long), and we each have the patience to sit back and listen to each other, trusting that the speaker will come to a stop in good time and give the other their turn. This business of going back and forth with one-liners is something I've occasionally managed for a short time but I can't seem to keep it up for long. To me, the truth is detailed and it takes time to communicate it well.

I understand that there is something of an epidemic of people who are adept at texting, but have never put in the hours of practice for verbal conversations. Of course, even some veteran talkers never learn some basics of conversation, such as listening. I finally had to scream obscenities and slam a door in the face of one such oblivious type to get through.