[ SATIRE ] You might be Left-Wing if...

Post Reply New Topic

---you support killing babies, but reject killing serial killers.

---you've ever referred to someone as a "bigot or Nazi".

---you think conservative speech is violence, so it has to be stopped, but leftist violence is speech, so it has to be defended

---you protest for women’s rights and defend a culture that won’t allow women to vote, drive, or travel without a man, and allows men to beat their wives and set them on fire, and counts their court testimony as half of a person.

---you simultaneously believe the police are violent trigger-happy racists who shoot people for no good reason and that we should disarm the populace so that only the government has guns.

---you think breaking a window helps the economy

---You support diversity...as long as others agree with you.

---you think anything Bernie Sanders says makes sense

---you agree that all the world's problems can be traced back to white Anglo-Saxon men taking advantage of others.

You might be Left-Wing if...

• You agree that all the world's problems can be traced back to white Anglo-Saxon men taking advantage of others.

• You are against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand and instantly pulling the plug on anyone who falls into a coma.

• You believe conservatives that tell the truth belong in jail, but a Democrat that's liar and sex offender belong in the White House.

• You believe in freedom of speech except for anyone that dares to disagree with you.

• You believe it is O.K. for a Democrat to lie, cheat, and steal, because their heart is in the right place; but any Republican should be thrown into federal prison for incorrect spelling.

• You believe it was legal for Bill Clinton to send U.S. troops into a new war without Congress' approval every nine weeks, but it is illegal for a Republican President to send troops anywhere, even with Congress' approval.

• You believe that a conservative that is accused of a crime in the Media is guilty, but a liberal that is convicted and sentenced after a fair trial is innocent.

• You believe that allowing the Army to invade a state illegally without the governor's approval is O.K., and that this is better than actually getting a governor who is willing to call Greyhound buses to transport natural disaster victims to medical help and living stations they had prepared ahead of time.

• You believe that businesses create oppression, and that only governments create prosperity.

• You believe that emotions, not facts, should affect objective decisions, regardless of who gets hurt.

• You believe that every plan Republicans make is a bad idea, but you cannot form any plan of your own whatsoever.

• You believe that gender roles are artificial but changing sex by surgery is natural.

• You believe that giving the government complete control over everything you do is a good idea.

• You believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and are caused by soccer moms driving SUVs.

• You believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of North Korean communists.

• You believe that hunters do not care about nature, but activists who have never been outside of a city do.

• You believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by Chinese and Russian governments is somehow in the best interests of the United States.

• You believe that it is O.K. for illegal immigrants to live in the United States as long as they live very, very, very far away from you.

• You believe that it is O.K. for you to lie to further your point of view, but it is wrong for other people to tell the truth to further a different point of view.

• You believe that LGBT parades should be constitutionally protected, but manger scenes at Christmas should be made illegal.

• You believe that manipulating other people through guilt is O.K.

• You believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and Thomas Edison.

• You believe that money is the answer to everything, and if you throw enough money at a problem you can fix anything, even the truth.

• You believe that self-esteem is more important than doing something to earn it.

• You believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.

• You believe that taxes are too low, and that ATM fees are too high.

• You believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

• You believe that the entire Patriot Act is wrong even though you have never taken the time and effort to read it.

• You believe that the military, not corrupt politicians, start wars.

• You believe that the only reason that Socialism fails whenever it has been tried is because people like you have not been in charge.

• You believe that the same teacher who cannot teach your kids how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

• You believe that there was no art before Federal funding.

• You believe that this list is part of a vast, right-wing conspiracy.

• You believe that Tony (Frank Sinatra) in the movie "A Hole in the Head" is victimized.

• You believe that you can blame the President for the failure of a state government to do what it's supposed to do.

• You believe the NRA is bad because it supports only certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports only certain other parts of the Constitution.

• You believe the only reason that 'terrorists' kill innocent people because 'terrorists' are misunderstood.

• You protest for women's reproductive rights, while simultaneously defending a culture that will not allow women to vote, drive, or travel without a man, and allows men to beat their wives and set them on fire, and counts their court testimony as half of a person.

• You simultaneously believe the police are violent trigger-happy racists who shoot people for no good reason and that we should disarm the populace so that only the government has guns.

• You support diversity but only if others think, speak, and act just like you.

• You support killing babies; but reject killing serial killers.

• You think anything Bernie Sanders says makes sense.

• You think breaking a window helps the economy.

• You think conservative speech is violence, so it must be stopped; but leftist violence is speech, so it must be defended.

• You think the words "Separation of Church and State" are explicit in the First Amendment of the Bill of Rights.

• You have ever referred to someone as a "bigot" or "Nazi" for disagreeing with you.

- You think “cancel culture” is a form of long overdue reparations but lionize Jacob Blake’s father.

- You write blogs about how Bernie Sanders is a capitalist pig on your MacBook at Starbucks.

If You Are Free...

Very Rarely Do i come
ACross Anyone So-Called 'Right
Wing' Who Is Truly FRee ACTuALLY Having Fun...
Mostly It's A World of Long Faces and Frowns to Be...
(Note: Jerry Falwell's Son, May Be an exception)
JeSuS F(uN) iN Christ i've Come
ACross Hundreds of Thousands
of People And Not Just Online
Either; SKeWeD As It IS 'That Way'...
But Again; Left or Right Wing Doesn't
Necessarily Mean Liberal or Conservative; Per Science
Of It; All Liberal Really Means is One Is Open Minded
to 'Different' And Not So Easily Disgusted by Different...

i didn't get 'Rich' By Being Liberal' 'Then';
But After i Did; i Dam Sure Got Free NoW As A Wing And Truly Rich...
Sure, i'm Still Conservative as far as Not Spending Money but i have little use for it

Other than the Basics
of Eating and Shelter...

Mileage Varies
Depending on
Make and Model
of Human Being, of Course;
More Specifically, 'Right Wing'
Hasn't Done Much of Anything
Truly Conservative since 'The Gambler' took 'Charge'..

'Gambling'
Is Never
Ever
Truly
Conservative
Or Liberal in Terms
of Actually Being
Internally Driven Happy;

Politicians, Pretend to
Be Conservative; and
Politicians Pretend to Be Liberals to Suit Their
Target Audiences As 'Gamblers' Usually are Never Truly
Happy; And Let's Face It; Politicians are Most All 'Gamblers'...

One of the Best Things About Online and in General Per 'the
Information Age'; People Tend to Expose Who They Truly Are:

i ain't scared...

Essence of Free

i ain't scared to put on Wings and Fly with no Fear of Falling....

Nature of True Liberal Freedom; As All Words Change

to Mean Something else...

When Ya
Got Ya
Wings
on Words Aren't Necessary at all..

Ya are Just Plain Old Colorful Free Generating them all Within...

Other than than That; 'Politics' is An Art of Being Bigger

Than What one is Truly Within...

'Trump' Has 'Perfected'
His Illusion that He
isn't the tiniest
'Soul'
in
His
Own Prison
On The Planet Now;
A Meme For This For Following
Ages and Fairer Winds to Breathe...

Hey, Even The Grinch Found His Way; If
Fairy Tales Are Real; There is Hope For 'Trumps'
A Chance in Hell...

But of
Course
This is Satire too...

It's What Most 'Real
Clowns' Do....

Like
Trump
Too A Parody
of Humanity too...
And Yes, Microcosm
In One 'Son of God' Too...

As with the inspiration - nope.