Born to suffer

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It's the reason i'm alive. Almost EVERYONE in this world (especially at my age) is happy and they enjoy life. I'm the exception of course. Being asocial, shy, loser, socially anxious and ugly (mentally AND physically ruined) is one of the hardest things. I dont have any friends, and i cant see anyone who suffers a similar fate. I cant be intimate with anyone because i suck at social interacions. I'm DESPERATELY waiting for something to happen. Sorry for my bad English (Im not a native english speaker).

It can feel that way ... yes. But, everything in life is temporary ... at least that’s what I’ve found. How you feel right now may not be how you feel 6months from now. Who can say? Many of us have co-morbid conditions alongside the autism, and no matter how positive anyone views life and themselves, there can be times where we question life. This is where if you’re fortunate, an interest or hobby does the job and pulls you back from the darkness ... there are other things you can try to boost your mood/outlook but it’s getting to the place where you can “Do” that can take a bit of time. Hope you manage to find something or someone to pull you out of these down times. Hang in there.

You have pinpointed the reason WP exists; to give Aspies a voice.
And emotional support.
And an awareness of being one of MANY.
Which we are.
Your education, income, living circumstances, social skills, or appearance don’t matter here.
Say what you want, there are people to listen now.
So join any discussion, you have friends now.
Welcome!

Im such a loser and socially inept.

I also have almost no friends. I have always had horrible social skills. I have been treated badly by most people in my life, and have had numerous traumatic and abusive failed relationships. With friends, they either get tired of me or I get tired of them, and we just drift apart. Sometimes I feel like I am ugly, but other times I don't. I've had people tell me I'm pretty, beautiful, or cute on a number of occasions. Some people have called me ugly but mainly just bullies when I was in middle school. I am a "curvy" plus-sized lady, but this is because I enjoy food way too much. I strongly dislike most "healthy" foods, so I rarely eat them. The meds I take to control my severe depression/anxiety also make me really hungry and contribute to the weight gain. So being larger, I'm certainly not society's ideal standard of beautiful, at least not now.
I totally get how you feel. About two or three years ago I went through a bout of severe depression/panic attacks. It was so bad I literally wanted to die. It took over a year for me to get on the right meds and get straightened out. Now I feel really good and happy most of the time. The psychiatrist really helped me with therapy and meds. I still have all of the problems I did before, they just don't bother me much anymore.
I wanted to let you know there is help out there for you. Consider seeing a psychiatrist if you're not already. It can really help.

Lots of men were crazy about Mama Cass...trust me.

She might have been close to 300 pounds.