Autistic Symptoms With Good "Social Intelligence"

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Should I look for a therapist who has more (any) experience with autism?
Yes 80%  80%  [ 8 ]
No - its not worth changing therapists 10%  10%  [ 1 ]
No - I don't think you're autistic 10%  10%  [ 1 ]
Total votes : 10

Mona Pereth
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30 Mar 2021, 1:18 pm

SharonB wrote:
I really like this list: https://the-art-of-autism.com/females-a ... checklist/ (some negative interpretations of characteristics, but mostly good)

On the whole I like this list too. There are a few things on it, though, that I question. For example:

"Imitates friends or peers in style, dress, attitude, interests, and manner (sometimes speech)"

Doesn't almost everyone do this (including NT's, perhaps even more so than autistic people), except for a handful of nonconformists? Isn't the crucial difference here that autistic people have to put more effort into such imitation to be able to pull it off?


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Last edited by Mona Pereth on 30 Mar 2021, 2:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Mona Pereth
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Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,811
Location: New York City (Queens)

30 Mar 2021, 1:37 pm

petraA wrote:
While I did have some social difficulties as a child, and always kind of positioned myself as an outsider, I am now considered to be very emotionally intelligent by most of my friends and my social skills are often seen as a strength when I am in leadership positions (which I frequently take on).

What are your social skills like when you are not in leadership positions, especially when you are a newcomer to a group?

I personally am better at leading groups than I am at participating in groups led by others. Learning to be a leader was actually an accommodation strategy for me. I'm still lousy at unfocused party chitchat, especially in group situations where I'm not the natural center of attention.

When I lead a group, I try to structure things in such a way as to maximize the ability of people with my specific group-participation difficulties to participate.

I consider my difficulties with unfocused party chitchat to be an unalterable fact of my nature, arising from my difficulties with attention-shifting (common among autistic people).

I consider my social skills to be very uneven. There are some specific social skills I've learned to be very good at, as a way of compensating for other social skills that I am extraordinarily bad at and consider to be beyond my reach. (This is why I so often talk about "autistic-friendly social skills.")


_________________
- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.
- My Twitter / "X" (new as of 2021)