Tight clothing and other sensory advice please

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Hello, my daughter is 7, like me she is undiagnosed but has had sensory issues around clothing (and other things) her whole life. I can relate to many of her ASD traits but not this one, not really. She can't really articulate what the problem is a lot of the time and we have many meltdowns relating to clothes. I'm wondering if anyone here has similar issues and can help me understand, or offer any coping strategies or ways we can help her?

The problems started with underwear. We have now found a type that she will wear but they're two sizes too small. It's still a struggle to get her to get dressed each day, she will put it off as long as possible. She will wear tights with loose shorts over the top, but not trousers or skirts. We worry about her being cold when it's minus degrees outside but it doesn't seem to bother her.

Then we had serious problems with shoes. She hates wearing shoes that are the 'correct' size for her, prefering ones that are too small. This is a problem for us because we want her feet to develop properly, not be crushed in little shoes. If we give her shoes she can fasten herself, velcro for example, she will do them up so tight that it cuts the blood circulation off in her feet. It also means she will stop every few minutes to re-tighten them so getting anyway takes ages. We've tried fixing this type of shoe so it can't be physically overtightened but it leads to meltdown and refusal to wear them.

She also has a problem with her bedding that makes it hard for her to get to sleep at night. If the bedding isn't tight around her she gets upset. We've tried extra-big bedding which can be wrapped right around, we've sewn zips onto the sides of her mattress so the duvet can be zipped to the bed. This is an ongoing struggle!

Finally, car seat belts are an issue. She will often get upset because her seatbelt isn't tight enough. As you will understand, seatbelts are supposed to give under gentle pulling and lock with a sharp pull - they're never 'tight' as such.

If any of this sounds familiar, if you experience or have dealt with the same any advice would be gratefully appreciated. It causes her (and me) a lot of distress and it isn't always possible to let her do what she wants.

The preference for tight clothes is a thing I can relate to. I'm not sure about your financial situation or location, but I'd suggest checking out a sporting goods store. They often have things like under armor in kids sizes, though I'm not sure how small the sizes go. My grandson was able to find sizes there that fit when he was five.. he needed them for ice hockey. Anyway, those clothes are generally tight/clingy and meant to be worn under other clothing. I have a few under armor long sleeve shirts that keep me warm, but they do get a bit itchy after being worn for more than six or seven hours, but until then, they are awesome. You can get leggings for running. Again, warm and skin tight. You might be able to grab some clingy, compression type socks there as well, but who knows if that will help with the shoe problem. Eh. Anyway, sports clothes or compression type items would be my suggestion.

As for the car seat? I dunno. Maybe get something padded to go around the seat belt? Some bulky fabric? Or maybe try to roll up a beach towel into a long tube and sort of tuck her waist in with it? Shove the ends back into the spot on the car where seat meets the bottom of the back support? Weighted blanket?

Again, no clue about the bedding situation, I actually hate being tightly tucked in under blankets. But people do swear by weighted blankets. Maybe that could help there as well?

Good luck figuring it all out. Hope some more people come along with suggestions here for you.

I want my underwear tight, can't stand boxers. Though the tight elastic disturbs me.
Everything else I want loose and airy.
If it was socially accepted, I'd wear skirts and dresses.
#Better call Freud

/Mats

It sounds like she might be craving deep pressure. Have you ever tried making a hotdog of her (wrapping her up in a mat or blanket really tight and rolling her around)? If she really enjoys that, maybe you could make a routine of doing it regularly, such as having it be a part of waking up. Fulfilling a sensory craving can mean less sensory issues for awhile afterwards.

I find it hard to comprehend because I am the opposite to this in that I need all my clothing loose on me and I can't wear anything tight fitting, especially thick wooly jumpers with polo necks or tight fitting socks or underpants. Also clothss tags usually irritate me and somw are so unbearablw I have holes where I have ripped the things out in frustration after having been scratched where they have been.
New woolen garments I can't wear next to my skin and I will even "Feel" the wool fibres sticking into me through a shirt, yet if the woolen garment is almost worn out it starts to feel soft, but it takes ages and ages and ages before they reach the comfort zone.
The issue I get is that I find worn out clothes comfortable to wear, and even charity shops will chuck worn clothes as they refuse to sell them, so trying to find comfortable clothes for me to wear that are not claustrophobickly tight and not scratchy is difficult.