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Should I quit or not?

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Jamesy
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29 Jun 2021, 5:03 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
You've said several times that you are having trouble meeting women in pubs / bars, so it's clear you should try something else whether you like pubs and bars or not.



Yes that’s true

I mentioned this already on the love and dating section but there was a woman I met on saturday (she is 28) for the first time in a long time. She was quite indifferent towards me even though we held hands and had a dance in that same bar in March 2019....


I guess maybe I am just a forgettable type of guy :(



IsabellaLinton
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29 Jun 2021, 5:08 pm

Did you let her know you're interested?


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Jamesy
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29 Jun 2021, 5:09 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Did you let her know you're interested?



No I am way to shy/socially awkward to do that



IsabellaLinton
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29 Jun 2021, 5:10 pm

Jamesy wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
Did you let her know you're interested?



No I am way to shy/socially awkward to do that


No offence, but then what's the point of trying to meet women?

What can you do to feel more comfortable taking that step?


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Jamesy
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29 Jun 2021, 5:15 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
IsabellaLinton wrote:
Did you let her know you're interested?



No I am way to shy/socially awkward to do that


No offence, but then what's the point of trying to meet women?

What can you do to feel more comfortable taking that step?



I suppose drinking alcohol could make me more comfortable taking the next step?


You know a bit of liquid courage 8)



IsabellaLinton
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29 Jun 2021, 5:23 pm

But weren't you in a bar when you saw her on Saturday? It sounds like alcohol didn't help.

Regardless alcohol isn't a longterm solution, and it won't help you to connect emotionally.

If a drunk man was trying to hit on me, I'd consider it nothing more than flirtation. I wouldn't take it seriously.


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Jamesy
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29 Jun 2021, 5:28 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
But weren't you in a bar when you saw her on Saturday? It sounds like alcohol didn't help.

Regardless alcohol isn't a longterm solution, and it won't help you to connect emotionally.

If a drunk man was trying to hit on me, I'd consider it nothing more than flirtation. I wouldn't take it seriously.



Could it be maybe that 4 years of an age gap between us might make it harder to find things in common?

It was her 28th birthday on Saturday and I am 32 in September



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29 Jun 2021, 5:29 pm

That's a totally normal age gap. Inconsequential, really.


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Jamesy
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29 Jun 2021, 5:31 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
That's a totally normal age gap. Inconsequential, really.



Inconsequential or not she clearly is not interested anymore. Sad really :cry:



IsabellaLinton
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29 Jun 2021, 5:32 pm

How would you know?

What did you expect her to do, if you didn't show any interest?


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Jamesy
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29 Jun 2021, 5:35 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
How would you know?

What did you expect her to do, if you didn't show any interest?




She already has a long term boyfriend I think



IsabellaLinton
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29 Jun 2021, 5:39 pm

It's easier to avoid the next step, if you think they have a boyfriend.

That sounds like anxiety rather than a fact.

Do you know for sure?


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Jamesy
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29 Jun 2021, 5:40 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
It's easier to avoid the next step, if you think they have a boyfriend.

That sounds like anxiety rather than a fact.

Do you know for sure?



Yes there a photos of them together on Facebook


I don’t get why she would hold hands and dance with me if she was already in a relationship?



naturalplastic
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29 Jun 2021, 5:41 pm

Someone HAS to drop the other shoe, and post this song. :)



Last edited by naturalplastic on 29 Jun 2021, 5:44 pm, edited 1 time in total.

IsabellaLinton
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29 Jun 2021, 5:43 pm

Jamesy wrote:


I don’t get why she would hold hands and dance with me if she was already in a relationship?


I could turn that around.

I don't get why you would hold hands and dance with her if you thought she was already in a relationship?

Or am I missing something?

It sounds like the problem isn't "where to meet women". It's "what to do" after you meet one.


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Jamesy
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29 Jun 2021, 5:46 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
Jamesy wrote:


I don’t get why she would hold hands and dance with me if she was already in a relationship?


I could turn that around.

I don't get why you would hold hands and dance with her if you thought she was already in a relationship?

Or am I missing something?

It sounds like the problem isn't "where to meet women". It's "what to do" after you meet one.




Well she come up to me started dancing first