Autistic Functioning Level & Dating Success

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ironpony
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02 Jul 2022, 3:55 pm

Would autistic people have more success if they made a lot of noise about it? For example, when the 'fat acceptance movement' happened, you now have overweight women on the cover of sports illustrated for example, and it's scene as attractive now.

So if autistic people made enough noise could you have autistic people on covers of magazines and it will be seen as attractive to opposite genders perhaps then, like other movements?



Muse933277
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03 Jul 2022, 1:04 pm

ironpony wrote:
Would autistic people have more success if they made a lot of noise about it? For example, when the 'fat acceptance movement' happened, you now have overweight women on the cover of sports illustrated for example, and it's scene as attractive now.

So if autistic people made enough noise could you have autistic people on covers of magazines and it will be seen as attractive to opposite genders perhaps then, like other movements?


Maybe.

I think one reason why the 'fat acceptance movement' took off is because being fat effects a lot of people. At least 40% of americans are obese, so it would make sense that being fat is more socially acceptable. Now imagine if only 1% of Americans were obese. Anybody who tried to make a 'fat acceptance movement' would probably not get a lot of attention, simply because obesity is not very common.


For gays, the gay acceptance movement took off as well. Assuming 3-5% of the population is LGBT, that's about 1 in 20 to 1 in 33 people who are either gay, lesbian, or bisexual. That's quite a large number of people so it would also make sense that the LGBT movement took off simply because it affects a lot of people.


What about autism? Well in 2016, 1 in 54 children were diagnosed by the age of 8, that's about 1.85% of the population. It's getting somewhat common, but it's no where near the level of commonality of being gay or being fat. Still, if autism continues to get more and more common, there could be an 'autism acceptance movement' that starts to take off.



ironpony
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03 Jul 2022, 3:01 pm

This makes sense. So I guess autistic people's best chance at dating is to also find someone autistic likely?



Muse933277
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03 Jul 2022, 4:31 pm

ironpony wrote:
This makes sense. So I guess autistic people's best chance at dating is to also find someone autistic likely?


I think the best chance autistic people have is to take one good, hard honest look at themselves, and try to pursue people who are similar to they are. If that means dating other autistic people? Sure.



ironpony
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04 Jul 2022, 12:08 am

I'm guessing autistic people usually make other compromises though when dating people in order to have more selection?

For example, I usually went out with quite obese women and my friends tell me that that's a bigger compromise that most guys are not willing to make.

But I guess that's an example of lowering one's standards if one is autistic?



kraftiekortie
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04 Jul 2022, 8:03 am

Is the person you’re seeing now “quite obese?”



ironpony
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04 Jul 2022, 8:07 am

No. Usually the women I saw were.



Muse933277
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05 Jul 2022, 9:31 am

A lot of guys could find girlfriends if their standards were low enough. The thing is that many guys don't want to date someone that is super obese, which is understandable. But the guys that are willing to date obese women, they have more options.


My former roommate who was also on the spectrum almost exclusively dated obese girls. He was a fairly average looking guy who didn't have the best personality BUT he had several girls over at his apartment during my 3 year stay. Yes, most of them were fairly overweight and not that conventionally pretty but hey, he got a girlfriend and got laid right? And as long as he was happy, then what I think doesn't matter.

I didn't know the man too well but what he had going for him was that he was more open minded when it came to physical appearance AND he tried a lot. He wasn't that outgoing and was pretty introverted so he mostly stuck to online dating and met a lot of girls on this app called MeetMe.

I was also trying to meet women at the exact same time he was but was mostly unsuccessful. A part of that reason was because I was going for pretty and neurotypical college age girls who I met in real life. Pretty girls who were at their "party phase" of their life and had no interest in dating a short underweight dork like me.



ironpony
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05 Jul 2022, 10:51 am

I'm sorry to hear that.

Well since I lowered my standards to mostly overweight or obese women, I wonder do a lot of other guys too?

Plus I hear overweight women are more passionate in bed because they want to make better impressions. I haven't had many thin women to compare to, but I've just heard that, if that's true.