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Jamesy
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30 May 2022, 7:19 am

I am long term unemployed for mental health reasons. My parents are still alive and in there early to mid 60s.

Is there a possibility when my parents die that I will be put into a institution because I am autistic and subjected to cruel treatment by the staff that work there? I live in England and I have found out that this is what can happen to autistic folk :(



Dillogic
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30 May 2022, 7:46 am

Only if you give them a reason to declare you incapable of looking after yourself, but cruelty probably won't be there (maybe it would be, though). Learn to look after yourself, whatever home you'll be left with, paying bills, budgeting and so on, and all will be fine. I doubt they'd do it unless someone brought it to the attention of the government, as they'd rather people live in their own place even if they have poor self-care; as long as things are paid for, no one cares too much how rundown things and/or people look (I guess this depends, though, as sometimes there's weird community stuff that you have to abide by, which is really goddamn stupid, but whatever). Not bringing attention to yourself, not making a fuss and avoiding the eyes of the government is generally the best course of action

I'd rather go homeless than live in a government facility or group home setting, and I would.



Joe90
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30 May 2022, 12:41 pm

Most care facilities do not mistreat their patients. I've worked in a care home for elderly people with dementia, ran by the NHS (not private) but the residents were well looked after and staff had to attend training courses regularly. There's a lot of pressure on the staff to look after residents well. So I'd much rather be a resident than a member of staff, because that was stressful.

Or you could have social workers that visit regularly and support you, whilst living in your own place. Perhaps get your parents to look into it for you while they're still around (they'll probably be around for another 20 years, give or take).


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jimmy m
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30 May 2022, 1:46 pm

I do not know your personal traits, so it is impossible for me to make a good assessment. I have Asperger's but I live with it. It makes me a different person. My mind works differently than most NTs. And that gives me certain advantages. Because I think differently, I am able to spot mistakes in the decision process of other people. So a good first step is to assess your strengths and weaknesses. What worked for me was using my strengths to overcome my weaknesses. As a result I have lived a truly fabulous life.

For example, I suffered a massive stroke a year ago and it destroyed a portion of my brain. Most people would go "Wow is me, and count the number of days before they die." But my mind works differently. I went to work almost at the beginning getting myself back. I lost my ability to read. I lost my knowledge of around 99 percent of my words. But I fought hard right from the beginning. And I have made quite a bit of progress. I am not completely back but I am functional. So my goal has become to teach other stroke victims to do the same things I did, so they can go back to living as humans again instead of ghost.


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kraftiekortie
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31 May 2022, 6:08 am

They wouldn’t stick you in an institution. It would cost them too much money.

If you’re officially diagnosed, you would be eligible for “council housing” and a monthly allowance. Ive known people in pretty decent “council housing.”

Even if you're not officially diagnosed, you'll still probably be eligible for "council housing"---but they would be stricter as far as you looking for a job is concerned.



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31 May 2022, 11:15 am

Do you feel you can look after yourself? Doing things like shopping, paying bills, preparing food, cleaning etc? If you don't, then do you feel you can spend some time to learn to be comfortable with the idea of looking after yourself? I think it's to some extent up to you to decide whether you need to rely on some institution to look after you.

I don't mean to dismiss the difficulties that you experience, but I get a feeling you are capable of looking after yourself after reading some of your other threads.

If you do go into an institution, it still doesn't necessarily mean you'll be subjected to cruel treatment. For every horror story you hear about an unethical institution, there are probably many decent/good institutions. People don't pay much attention to good ones. That's why you don't hear about them.



Suzyb
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31 May 2022, 2:08 pm

A care placement will require social work referral and you would be involved in the process of a needs assessment. A mental hospital will require sectioning under the Mental Health Act and a Doctor to declare this. Should you be able to look after yourself and are not a danger to yourself or the public, then it is unlikely that you would require assessment or social work involvement for an institution/care placement but I am not an expert by any means on the subject.

If you can, try and chat with your parents or someone you trust over your concerns as it is a really big thing to be worrying about and may cause you a lot of stress for quite a while. Take care of you!



kraftiekortie
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31 May 2022, 2:31 pm

Yep. Talk to a social worker---preferably YOUR social worker.

You're a grown person. You're entitled to look after your own affairs. Or at least know your situation once your parents pass away.

I doubt they would institutionalize you---unless you truly present as someone who is a danger to yourself or others.

Aren't there places in the community---like "group homes" for people who can pretty much take care of themselves, but need slight help?



Jamesy
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01 Jun 2022, 6:40 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Yep. Talk to a social worker---preferably YOUR social worker.

You're a grown person. You're entitled to look after your own affairs. Or at least know your situation once your parents pass away.

I doubt they would institutionalize you---unless you truly present as someone who is a danger to yourself or others.

Aren't there places in the community---like "group homes" for people who can pretty much take care of themselves, but need slight help?



Ideally I would prefer just to live in my own house not a group home as such.



kraftiekortie
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01 Jun 2022, 7:52 am

I can understand that. That's what I would want, too.

And you might get it. You have a better chance of it in the UK than in the US.