Was it better to be unaware of your own autism?

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Joined: 13 Sep 2022
Gender: Male
Posts: 10
Location: Ireland

14 Sep 2022, 8:50 am

I dont think it made much of a difference. I was a freak before, and im a freak now. Ive never fitted in, not even with other aspies. I guess its good, because I get disability allowance. Its not good, because my parents forced me to take a lot of nasty antipsychotics and treated me like i was broken, when they really should have taken a look at themselves.


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Joined: 7 Jan 2021
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,113
Location: England

14 Sep 2022, 1:43 pm

AngloIrishGuy wrote:
I dont think it made much of a difference. I was a freak before, and im a freak now. Ive never fitted in, not even with other aspies.

Same here. I've just accepted now that I will never find my 'niche' or 'gang', I'll always be the odd one out. I'm lucky I found a husband who accepted me, god knows how that happened! But in a few decades, no doubt he'll die first and I'll be alone again.

I am here for interesting, meaningful discussions and thoughtful, rewarding conversations. I very quickly lose interest in long, drawn-out arguments.
I'm sorry if I get you mixed up with other people, I'm not good at telling people apart. Just remind me of our last conversation then I'll know who you are.

Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

Joined: 26 Apr 2022
Age: 23
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Posts: 55

14 Sep 2022, 2:18 pm

I was diagnosed when I was 5, so I can't really remember how life was before that to be able to make a clear comparison.


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Joined: 14 Jan 2018
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,254
Location: UK

14 Sep 2022, 3:23 pm

Diagnosed at 46 and much better off for it. For a couple of years it felt like a big deal but not so much any more.

Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

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Joined: 1 Apr 2013
Age: 34
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Posts: 199
Location: Bratislava

14 Sep 2022, 6:16 pm

Maybe, but currently reading a book about autism, from Christopher Gillber(2002),
a guide to Asperger syndrome - ... and its scary accurate account of certain realities in my life.

Unfortunately I spend a good deal of my life thinking something is not right with me, at times, I had a tendency to mask my natural instincts and behaviors.

I had many situations where I may or did cause lots of unintended consequences.
Sometimes due to watching and repeating behaviors without full comprehension what they are.

I have spend most of my life looking at people wondering how they do it.

My interactions were often horrible and not very fun.

Some interaction may have been fun for me, but not always acceptable.

So yeah my ability to learn about autism has some properties and qualities that I may use to work on my self in regards to people relations, optimize my approach to people and learn to be OK with certain things without being hindered by people who function differently.

I intend to take notes and see a psychologist as soon as possible and see what type of framework I can use to work on this.
Not sure what can be done or what I will do with the information yet.
Then again if its going to end up better I prefer that.

I prefer to know. After all truth is truth whether someone likes it or not.


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Joined: 19 Nov 2017
Age: 68
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,839

14 Sep 2022, 6:57 pm

It was shocking and then illuminating. I am delighted to have learned I have autism. It makes my life make sense. It is the only thing that explains all the weirdness in my life.

The rivers flow not past, but through us, thrilling, tingling, vibrating every fiber and cell of the substance of our bodies, making them glide and sing. – John Muir