Page 1 of 2 [ 24 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

wasted_space
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jul 2007
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 16

08 Aug 2007, 5:04 am

Particulary when it's time to meet new people (Mum's friends, associates, classmates). I don't know what to say (maybe because they are NT's and don't have any obssesions at all) and feel confused. So I just stand and look down. There are some excerpts like one day I've meet a boy from Internet, but he was an ElectroGoth :D , and I'm interested in quite similar, like him.

How can I solve this problem?

P.S. I am 15-years old.
P.S.2 I don't know exactly if I have autism, I've never been to doctors. But I have many signs of it.



0_equals_true
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Apr 2007
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,038
Location: London

08 Aug 2007, 8:30 am

That sounds like social phobia. Whether you have AS or not can sort of be approached separately, or at least I would advise you do so initially.

The best option is Cognative Behavioural Therapy.



girl7000
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Mar 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 659
Location: Somewhere in the Atlantic

08 Aug 2007, 9:19 am

It might also be worth pursuing diagnosis for autism as, although CBT can be very effective, people with autism spectrum disorders generally need CBT that is designed specifically for people with autism, as opposed to 'standard' CBT for neuro-typical people.

Perhaps it would be an idea to find out whether you are aspie / autie or NT first, and then find a form of therapy that is right for you.



0_equals_true
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Apr 2007
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,038
Location: London

08 Aug 2007, 9:26 am

CBT courses can be applied to anything. Except: a. when a problem cannot be easily defined or identified. b. the necessary motivation is not there. If either are true, you might want to try different therapies and treatments first.

So what I mean by defined is like "I fear people" rather than "I feel odd sometimes".

But really you have to apply it to you, that is the only way it will work.

Actually I agree with girl7000. Except, I never really did a course I learnt from a book and applied it so it would work for me. Only gradually and still use it. Even NTs who pay some CBT therapist, that person is only there some of the time and it doesn't mean they are going to come up with the best solutions for them.

I would recommend reading Gillian Butler books. Just for the concept take the examples and structure with a grain of salt.



wasted_space
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jul 2007
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 16

08 Aug 2007, 10:15 am

Thanks for the answers, I needed them a lot.

There is another problem. Autism in my small country has been known very early (since 1994 approximately) and medics may not be aware of it. I know one event then one girl, who was 18, had all autistic lineament, many obssesions, high IQ and doctors didn't determine she had AS. They said that she has depression, social anxiety etc. Though these diseases are the results of autism :!: I fear that it will be to me too.

I don't know if Cognative Behavioural Therapy is being applied in my nation.

However, I suppose I should go to the doctors and they will tell me what's wrong with me.



Woman
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jun 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 121
Location: Among the Petunas

08 Aug 2007, 11:15 am

wasted_space wrote:
Particulary when it's time to meet new people (Mum's friends, associates, classmates). I don't know what to say (maybe because they are NT's and don't have any obssesions at all) and feel confused. So I just stand and look down. There are some excerpts like one day I've meet a boy from Internet, but he was an ElectroGoth :D , and I'm interested in quite similar, like him.

How can I solve this problem?

P.S. I am 15-years old.
P.S.2 I don't know exactly if I have autism, I've never been to doctors. But I have many signs of it.

That it hard. It does sound like social anxiety. When I feel this way, I try my best to look confident ,keep my head up and smile. It makes you more approachable to others. Also, before you get to the place where the new people are, make a list of a few topics & take the list with you. Often it is hard to think up interesting topics when under pressure, so do that before you get to the social scene. Good luck! :)



MrMacPhisto
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 20 May 2007
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,187
Location: Chatham

08 Aug 2007, 11:27 am

Don't worry you have nothing to be scared of with people especially NTs they are perfectly human you just think differently but anyhow even Nts have obsessions as well. It's perfectly normal



wasted_space
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jul 2007
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 16

08 Aug 2007, 11:47 am

MrMacPhisto wrote:
Don't worry you have nothing to be scared of with people especially NTs they are perfectly human you just think differently but anyhow even Nts have obsessions as well. It's perfectly normal


Many of people, which I now (e.g. classmates), are bullies, liars and seem to be narrow-minded, because they talk nonsense. And I'm scared of these.



richardbenson
Xfractor Card #351
Xfractor Card #351

User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,553
Location: Leave only a footprint behind

08 Aug 2007, 1:47 pm

good luck with that, most of the times i like being by myself, but really get annoyed if i have to walk behind someone and they look back like "wtf?" 8O


_________________
Winds of clarity. a universal understanding come and go, I've seen though the Darkness to understand the bounty of Light


juliekitty
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Jun 2006
Age: 58
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,540

08 Aug 2007, 1:53 pm

wasted_space wrote:
MrMacPhisto wrote:
Don't worry you have nothing to be scared of with people especially NTs they are perfectly human you just think differently but anyhow even Nts have obsessions as well. It's perfectly normal


Many of people, which I now (e.g. classmates), are bullies, liars and seem to be narrow-minded, because they talk nonsense. And I'm scared of these.


I think there is good reason to be scared of people.

But try not to let the fear run your life. Just be very careful of new people until they have proved themselves to you.



ghostgurl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Nov 2006
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,328
Location: Orange County, CA

08 Aug 2007, 2:07 pm

I get most uncomfortable around people I don't know. I don't know what to say to them either. Sounds like social anxiety.


_________________
Currently Reading: Survival by Juliet E. Czerneda
http://dazed-girl.livejournal.com/
Vote Kalister 2008


wasted_space
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jul 2007
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 16

08 Aug 2007, 2:20 pm

ghostgurl wrote:
I get most uncomfortable around people I don't know. I don't know what to say to them either. Sounds like social anxiety.


Yes, it does.

Or could it be a symptom of Asperger?



Sopho
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Apr 2007
Gender: Female
Posts: 10,859

08 Aug 2007, 2:22 pm

wasted_space wrote:
ghostgurl wrote:
I get most uncomfortable around people I don't know. I don't know what to say to them either. Sounds like social anxiety.


Yes, it does.

Or could it be a symptom of Asperger?

I think a lot of people with AS also have social anxiety, to a degree. But it seems to be more of a result of AS, rather than a symptom of it. Or at least, it is in my case.



0_equals_true
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Apr 2007
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,038
Location: London

08 Aug 2007, 2:50 pm

For me it was a result of not knowing how relating to people, doing my own thing and been bullied because of it.

But my cognitive problems and overload of information made want to spend more time on my own, so I was not clued up in general.

I have SA friends who are not AS. They mostly had problems from teen years. When I was a young child I was 'self sufficient' in play, didn't really follow instructions, and would wander off. But my SA came later I think.



richardbenson
Xfractor Card #351
Xfractor Card #351

User avatar

Joined: 30 Oct 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,553
Location: Leave only a footprint behind

08 Aug 2007, 5:18 pm

0_equals_true wrote:
But my cognitive problems and overload of information made want to spend more time on my own, so I was not clued up in general.
i have the same thing going on with me


_________________
Winds of clarity. a universal understanding come and go, I've seen though the Darkness to understand the bounty of Light


wasted_space
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jul 2007
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 16

09 Aug 2007, 12:29 am

What you're trying to say is that I could have social anxiety/sociophobia but not AS? And also I could have both of them at the same time?