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It’s 2022. How do people not know an Aspie when they see 1?

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rse92
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08 Sep 2022, 2:23 pm

CubsBullsBears wrote:
One of the shift managers, whom I’ll call manager 1(the same one I said on here that I wanted to date)was giving me a hard time for something I thought was someone else’s responsibility. She said “I don’t mean to be disrespectful but” and then proceeded to say some snarky stuff(example: I’m not your maid). I said back to her that that really is disrespectful. Another manager, who I’ll call manager 2 then said “she’s not being disrespectful, she’s telling you to do your job”.

I’ll just stop right there. In case you haven’t figured it out, this guy somehow does not understand that you can be a manager and not be a prick. I hate him so much just for that.

After that, I went to do a delivery. On my way there I get told to come back bc the customer showed up at the store. After I did that, there were 2 different misunderstandings that seemingly made manager 1 even more mad bc she yelled out to me “CBB, you can go home!”.

I would say that manager 1 lost her chance to ever go out with me, although I’ll guess she would never wanna date me anyway, so she prob wouldn’t be feeling any sort of loss, bc I have a totally unfair disadvantage in this world.

Before I said “to two co workers, screw you”. Make that 4. :roll:


I would point out that the common denominator in all four of your conflicts with co-workers is you. Perhaps you should examine your own behavior.



CubsBullsBears
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08 Sep 2022, 2:40 pm

rse92 wrote:
CubsBullsBears wrote:
One of the shift managers, whom I’ll call manager 1(the same one I said on here that I wanted to date)was giving me a hard time for something I thought was someone else’s responsibility. She said “I don’t mean to be disrespectful but” and then proceeded to say some snarky stuff(example: I’m not your maid). I said back to her that that really is disrespectful. Another manager, who I’ll call manager 2 then said “she’s not being disrespectful, she’s telling you to do your job”.

I’ll just stop right there. In case you haven’t figured it out, this guy somehow does not understand that you can be a manager and not be a prick. I hate him so much just for that.

After that, I went to do a delivery. On my way there I get told to come back bc the customer showed up at the store. After I did that, there were 2 different misunderstandings that seemingly made manager 1 even more mad bc she yelled out to me “CBB, you can go home!”.

I would say that manager 1 lost her chance to ever go out with me, although I’ll guess she would never wanna date me anyway, so she prob wouldn’t be feeling any sort of loss, bc I have a totally unfair disadvantage in this world.

Before I said “to two co workers, screw you”. Make that 4. :roll:


I would point out that the common denominator in all four of your conflicts with co-workers is you. Perhaps you should examine your own behavior.
you mean let people leave me to do big tasks on my own, be b**chy with me and for me to be ok with it all? No thanks.


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League_Girl
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08 Sep 2022, 3:07 pm

Most people aren't going to assume every person they find annoying is autistic or every dumb person they run into or every self absorbed person. It's like assuming every as*hole has a mental disorder or assuming every Karen has anxiety issues and can't control their emotions. This would be ableism.


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08 Sep 2022, 3:55 pm

People don't see aspies. They just see socially unacceptable behaviour.

kraftiekortie wrote:
Maybe this might inspire you to go to college.....

Fast food is like that....it just sucks.


I'd highly recommend a skilled trade instead. No student debt, better wages, high demand, union jobs with benefits, transferable nationwide & internationally etc.


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CubsBullsBears
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09 Sep 2022, 12:28 pm

Yesterday I worked a 3 hour shift with manager 1. I was hoping she would apologize so of course that didn’t happen.

Especially with that being the case, I’m having a hard time believing I should apologize. She went too far with her words and I called her out on it. I’ve thought about possibility disclosing my Asperger’s to her. I wonder how’d she react to me saying “it seems as if there’s a lack of understanding. I think maybe you should know that I have Asperger’s. If I’m doing something you don’t like it’s probably unintentional. I’ve had many co workers/managers get on my case in the past and I’m fed up with it so that’s why I’ve sometimes talked back. I hope you understand”.

Something to that effect.


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goldfish21
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09 Sep 2022, 1:30 pm

Probably won't do you any good. Probably best to just let it go and not dwell on it and do your level best to behave as expected at work.


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rse92
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09 Sep 2022, 3:15 pm

CubsBullsBears wrote:
Yesterday I worked a 3 hour shift with manager 1. I was hoping she would apologize so of course that didn’t happen.

Especially with that being the case, I’m having a hard time believing I should apologize. She went too far with her words and I called her out on it. I’ve thought about possibility disclosing my Asperger’s to her. I wonder how’d she react to me saying “it seems as if there’s a lack of understanding. I think maybe you should know that I have Asperger’s. If I’m doing something you don’t like it’s probably unintentional. I’ve had many co workers/managers get on my case in the past and I’m fed up with it so that’s why I’ve sometimes talked back. I hope you understand”.

Something to that effect.


Maybe that's exactly what you should say to her.



goldfish21
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09 Sep 2022, 3:18 pm

Sure fire way to make her think you're weird, imo.

Only bring it up/disclose it if it becomes relevant in the moment. If she asks why you're behaving a certain way or said or did a certain thing, then it may be appropriate to disclose that it's because of your asperger's and maybe she'll have a light bulb moment of understanding.

Otherwise it'll likely just come across as weird and inappropriate to bring up, especially a gripe about being "fed up with managers getting on your case." That's surely not going to score you any brownie points.


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rse92
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09 Sep 2022, 3:31 pm

goldfish21 wrote:
Sure fire way to make her think you're weird, imo.

Only bring it up/disclose it if it becomes relevant in the moment. If she asks why you're behaving a certain way or said or did a certain thing, then it may be appropriate to disclose that it's because of your asperger's and maybe she'll have a light bulb moment of understanding.

Otherwise it'll likely just come across as weird and inappropriate to bring up, especially a gripe about being "fed up with managers getting on your case." That's surely not going to score you any brownie points.


Boo hoo, he has a totally unfair disadvantage in this world. He delivers pizza for goodness sakes! What is it about autism that makes his job difficult? I hate when people use their autism as a crutch. i can't help it if I am a prick to my bosses; I have an unfair disadvantage in this world!

Maybe if he explained that disadvantage to his bosses and asked for their understanding and offered to try to do better, he'd get himself out of the stewpot he's in now where he hates everybody and eveybody hates him.



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09 Sep 2022, 3:45 pm

You really think it’s a wise move for him to say that he’s fed up with managers getting on his case?

That’s not going to be in his best interest as it’s likely to lose him hours or his job entirely.


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kraftiekortie
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09 Sep 2022, 10:46 pm

Nope. Telling he has Asperger’s will backfire on him.



CubsBullsBears
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09 Sep 2022, 10:49 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Nope. Telling he has Asperger’s will backfire on him.
why do you believe that?


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r00tb33r
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09 Sep 2022, 10:53 pm

CubsBullsBears wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
Nope. Telling he has Asperger’s will backfire on him.
why do you believe that?

I see it as a valid experiment, though only to be done if you have prepared alternative employment arrangements.


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kraftiekortie
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09 Sep 2022, 10:56 pm

They’d probably cut back or eliminate your hours.

And you would have no recourse.



CubsBullsBears
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09 Sep 2022, 11:01 pm

Y'all are making it sound like I could get fired just for disclosing my aspergers. Someone explain please.


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kraftiekortie
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09 Sep 2022, 11:05 pm

They won’t fire you explicitly for disclosing you have Asperger’s.

They can make up any reason they want for firing you, if you’re not in a union. It’s at-will employment.

They would probably wait a week or two before they come up with the “reason,” though.