I took the day off work today but feeling guilty

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Joe90
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22 Feb 2023, 1:08 am

I've had a few days off last year for different (valid) reasons and I had to have a meeting with my boss about my attendance in November.

Although it's only February I still haven't had any time off since the meeting, but last night was a long night for me, as my boyfriend was feeling unwell and difficulties breathing so I had to wait up all night with him for an ambulance - that took 5 hours to come. That's the NHS for you. So due to the long wait, even though it was an emergency call, I was instructed to stay with him and proceed any CPR if I had to (which luckily I knew how to do but didn't need to do it, although it would have come to that if we'd waited much longer).

Anyway, cut a long story short it isn't covid (which I knew anyway), and he is OK now. But after a long night and so much anxiety for both of us, I called in sick this morning. I now feel worried though in case staying up with someone all night and not getting any sleep until they were seen (which wasn't until morning), isn't a valid excuse for taking a day off work. Whenever we're off work we have to fill out a form when we come back explaining why we were off, and the questions on the form are aimed at the employee being ill. But I wasn't ill. I just had had a very bad night trying to keep my boyfriend alive while we were waiting for an ambulance, and I was exhausted the next morning and my body so badly needed to catch up on sleep. Plus I wanted to be there with my boyfriend the following day to pick up his prescription medication for him, as he's obviously feeling more exhausted than I am.

Is this a valid excuse to have a day off work? I say "excuse", because the way the form is written it's like it's saying "what's your excuse and is it valid? If your excuse isn't valid enough then you're a skiver".


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babybird
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22 Feb 2023, 2:48 am

Yes


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pastelanxiety
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12 Mar 2023, 1:53 am

You absolutely should not feel guilty for taking the day off work! In my opinion, this is a very valid reason (I say reason and not excuse) to take a day off as it must have been a very stressful situation to be in for both you and your boyfriend. Your employer should be offering support at a time like this, not making you feel guilty for prioritizing you and your boyfriend's wellbeing.

If this is an ongoing issue (your workplace making you feel as though you can't take time off for necessary things), then could you possibly speak with someone in HR maybe to discuss your concerns? Or is your workplace unionized? I'm not sure how it works where you live, but over where I am we can lean on union support if your employer is unionized.

I hope your boyfriend is doing okay now