what songs do you attribute to your mental condition(s)?

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IsabellaLinton
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14 Nov 2023, 6:21 pm




https://youtu.be/J3_UPuNxx74?feature=shared


I tried to find those threads with songs about autism but couldn't find them.

This will do for CPSTD and PTSD.


*for my love



Hide in your shell cuz the world is out to bleed you for a ride
What will you gain, making your life a little longer?
Heaven or Hell, was the journey cold that gave you eyes of steel?
Sheltered behind, painting your mind and playing joker

Too frightening to listen to a stranger
Too beautiful to put your pride in danger
You're waiting for someone to understand you
But you've got demons in your closet
And you're screaming out to stop it
Saying life's begun to cheat you
Friends are out to beat you
Grab on to what you can scramble for

Don't let the tears linger on inside now
Cuz it's sure time you gained control
If I can help you, if I can help you
If I can help you, just let me know

Well let me show you the nearest signpost
To get your heart back and on the road
If I can help you, just let me know

All through the night as you lie awake and hold yourself so tight
What do you need, a second-hand-movie-star to tend you?
I, as a boy, I believed the saying 'the cure for pain' was love
How would it be if you could see the world through my eyes?

Too frightening, the fire's getting colder
Too beautiful to think you're getting older
You're looking for someone to give an answer
But what you see is just illusion
You're surrounded by confusion
Saying, life's begun to cheat you
Friends are out to beat you
Grab on to what you can scramble for

I wanna feel you, I wanna touch you
Please let me near you, let me near you
Can you hear what I'm saying?
Well I'm hoping, I'm dreamin', I'm prayin'
I know what you're thinkin'
I see what you're seein'

Never ever let yourself go
Or hold yourself down
Why d'ya hold yourself down?
Why don't you listen, you can trust me

There's a place I know the way to
A place there's a need to feel you're
Feel you're all alone
Oh won't you hear me?

I know exactly what you're feelin'
Cuz all your troubles are within you
So begin to see that I'm just bleeding to
Love me and love you

Loving is the way to help me, help you
Why must we be so cool
We're such damn fools


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colliegrace
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19 Nov 2023, 9:45 pm



I associate this song strongly with borderline personality disorder. I feel like BPD has in the past made me the worst version of myself.


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ASD, most likely have dyscalculia & BPD as well. Also dx'd ADHD-C, but don't think it's accurate.
RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)

Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD


TwilightPrincess
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21 Nov 2023, 4:58 pm



Shostakovich - String Quartet No. 8

The first movement describes my experience with depression. The second and third movements describe my anxiety, angst, and anger. The fourth and fifth my sadness and resignation. Overall, it illustrates my brain, personal struggles, and worldview perhaps like no other piece of music I've found yet.

Quote:
The piece was written shortly after Shostakovich reluctantly joined the Communist Party. According to the score, it is dedicated "to the victims of fascism and the war"; his son Maxim interprets this as a reference to the victims of all totalitarianism, while his daughter Galina says that he dedicated it to himself, and that the published dedication was imposed by Soviet authorities. Shostakovich's friend, Lev Lebedinsky, said that Shostakovich thought of the work as his epitaph and that he planned to commit suicide around this time. Peter J. Rabinowitz has also pointed to covert references to Richard Strauss's Metamorphosen in the Eighth Quartet.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/String_Qu ... ostakovich)

I think his daughter was correct. His musical signature is throughout the work. It feels extremely personal, real, and raw.

His musical signature:
Image


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TwilightPrincess
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12 Dec 2023, 9:52 pm


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IsabellaLinton
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12 Dec 2023, 9:56 pm

:( :( :( ^




https://youtu.be/xb4Z4pxvgWs?feature=shared


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IsabellaLinton
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13 Dec 2023, 10:43 pm




https://youtu.be/3_Y5J0ka4_k?feature=shared


My brain's been battered, splattered all over -


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colliegrace
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14 Dec 2023, 12:58 am

Yet another song I relate to BPD. One aspect of BPD is constantly reshaping your identity because you aren't sure what you are, really



I'm a shapeshifter
At Poe's Masquerade
Hiding both face and mind
All free for you to draw
I'm a shapeshifter
What else should I be?
Please don't take off my mask
Revealing dark


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ASD, most likely have dyscalculia & BPD as well. Also dx'd ADHD-C, but don't think it's accurate.
RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)

Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD


RedDeathFlower13
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14 Dec 2023, 2:12 pm

Me when my inner-beast comes out during my worst manic episodes. :|

https://youtu.be/BraJAawTUuM?si=QRdZ9zfoiIU1sNHe



Can't stop to think about it
Slave to the brain I doubted
Feels like a struggle in my tortured body
Seized up, I stop and stammer
Make me forget my manners
But I've got warning if you think you want me
You smack the sense out of me
Redder than dirty money
I'm not a monster but you make me wonder
Put in a blaze of fury
Eyes getting kinda blurry
Making me wanna roar like thunder
Maybe it's the moonlight
Mixed with carnal insight
Violent but it feels right
You make me come unsheathed
Like I'm a weapon
Born and bred to threaten
'Cause when it feels like heaven
I wanna bare my teeth
I wanna bare my teeth
I can't escape the feeling
Your eyes just left me reeling
Lonely and gentle like I just might hurt you
Wrapped in all mixed emotions
Done going through the motions
Who gives a f**k if we could let my claws loose?
Cinematic thrills of dating
We'll get a hard R rating
Done up and fancy for a horror showdown
Too much love to inhibit
Hungry like nature's own exhibit
You wondered often but you'll know now
Maybe it's the moonlight
Mixed with carnal insight
Violent but it feels right
You make me come unsheathed
Like I'm a weapon
Born and bred to threaten
'Cause when it feels like heaven
I wanna bare my teeth
I wanna bare my teeth
You put my head in the zone
So come on, throw me a bone
Say you can take it, now can you take it?
f****d in the head, but I'm here
I know you're thrilled by the fear
Here's our solution, natural solution
The apex versus the prey
My fangs don't get in the way
But I can't promise I won't be too hasty
We've got the time for it all
You make it impossible
To keep together when you look so tasty
Maybe it's the moonlight
Mixed with carnal insight
Maybe it's the moonlight
Mixed with carnal insight
Violent but it feels right
You make me come unsheathed
Like I'm a weapon
Born and bred to threaten
'Cause when it feels like heaven
I wanna bare my teeth
I wanna bare my teeth
You make me wanna show my teeth, teeth, teeth
You make me wanna show my teeth
You make me wanna show my teeth, teeth, teeth
You make me wanna show my teeth


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IsabellaLinton
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14 Dec 2023, 2:17 pm




https://youtu.be/Od6hY_50Dh0?feature=shared


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RedDeathFlower13
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15 Dec 2023, 3:09 pm

"Southern Cross" whenever I feel 'happy' manic and full of energy. :bounce:



These lyrics describe the God-like Euphoria I feel in my brain (which is NOT a good thing!) :mrgreen:

"Go, if you come up against a hurdle
Fight, fight for the things you believe in
Passion, joy, sorrow, pain and tears
All they will be pabulum of your life
Go, if you come under the wet yourself
Fight, fight for the person you believe in
Destiny is calling you
Obey me, or defy me!"


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funeralxempire
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15 Dec 2023, 3:22 pm

RedDeathFlower13 wrote:
Me when my inner-beast comes out during my worst manic episodes. :|


This is deeply relatable. For some reason people want conflict with me when I'm in that state even though I'm only going to get energized by the conflict, while they'll end up drained.


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RedDeathFlower13
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15 Dec 2023, 3:29 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
RedDeathFlower13 wrote:
Me when my inner-beast comes out during my worst manic episodes. :|


This is deeply relatable. For some reason people want conflict with me when I'm in that state even though I'm only going to get energized by the conflict, while they'll end up drained.


I feel ya, this condition really does make me feel like a human-to-werewolf. Hence the song I chose. :(

It takes every bit of energy I have not to let the monster inside me out and it becomes very exhausting...


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funeralxempire
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15 Dec 2023, 3:31 pm

RedDeathFlower13 wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
RedDeathFlower13 wrote:
Me when my inner-beast comes out during my worst manic episodes. :|


This is deeply relatable. For some reason people want conflict with me when I'm in that state even though I'm only going to get energized by the conflict, while they'll end up drained.


I feel ya, this condition really does make me feel like a human-to-werewolf. Hence the song I chose. :(

It takes every bit of energy I have not to let the monster inside me out and it becomes very exhausting...



Relatable. I usually end up failing at keeping it controlled. :oops:


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戦争ではなく戦争と戦う


RedDeathFlower13
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15 Dec 2023, 3:36 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
RedDeathFlower13 wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
RedDeathFlower13 wrote:
Me when my inner-beast comes out during my worst manic episodes. :|


This is deeply relatable. For some reason people want conflict with me when I'm in that state even though I'm only going to get energized by the conflict, while they'll end up drained.


I feel ya, this condition really does make me feel like a human-to-werewolf. Hence the song I chose. :(

It takes every bit of energy I have not to let the monster inside me out and it becomes very exhausting...



Relatable. I usually end up failing at keeping it controlled. :oops:



Same here. :oops:


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colliegrace
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11 Feb 2024, 9:25 pm

Big TW on this one for suic!dal sentiments in the lyrics



I wanna be like you, I wanna say that I can
I wanna be the person that you think that I am
But even if I had it all come true like a dream
Is the person I came to be the the really real me?

[...]

Day after day I found my way, sleepwalking through
Like this I’ll fade without a trace, it’s for the best I do

Just by living I’m nothing for another day
Hundred lives, never knowing me or anything
Nobody wanted me, no one there to need
Why would I wanna live in the kind of world I see?

Just by leaving I’m no one for another day
Hundred lives, never changing them or anything
Nobody there to scream, no more being mean to me
Then could I have it all back in one piece?


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ASD, most likely have dyscalculia & BPD as well. Also dx'd ADHD-C, but don't think it's accurate.
RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)

Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD


colliegrace
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11 Feb 2024, 10:10 pm



Just a scar somewhere down inside of me
Something I can not repair
Even though it will always be
I pretend it isn't there (this is how I feel)
I'm trapped in yesterday (just a memory)
Where the pain is all I know (this is all I know)
And I'll never break away (can't break free)
'Cause when I'm alone
I'm lost in these memories
Living behind my own illusion
Lost all my dignity
Living inside my own confusion
But I'm tired, I will always be afraid
Of the damage I've received
Broken promises they made
And how blindly I believed (this is all I know)
And I'll never break away (can't break free)
'Cause when I'm alone
I'm lost in these memories
Living behind my own illusion
Lost all my dignity
Living inside my own confusion
I try to keep this pain inside, but I will never be alright
I try to keep this pain inside, but I will never be alright
(I'm lost) I try to keep this pain inside, but I will never be alright
(I'm lost) I try to keep this pain inside, but I will never be alright
I'm lost in these memories
Living behind my own illusion
Lost all my dignity
Living inside my own confusion


_________________
ASD, most likely have dyscalculia & BPD as well. Also dx'd ADHD-C, but don't think it's accurate.
RAADs: 104 | ASQ: 30 | Aspie Quiz: 116/200 (84% probability of being atypical)

Also diagnosed with: seasonal depression, anxiety, OCD