how to tell friend to stop calling me so much???

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I have tried and tried, I swear. I have a hard time being as frank as I need to be and putting my foot down.

Yes, this friend is another autistic person. Different level of support needs than me.

He wants to talk to me every single day and I can only stand so much before I sort of semi shut down in regards to speaking to him. By this I mean I become irritable and quiet, sometimes only responding in grunts and short phrases, or just "k."
Most days I am able to limit the chatting to less than 20 minutes by specifically telling him "20 minutes" or even just 10 minutes sometimes. Sometimes he makes a fuss ("I ain't talked to you at all today"), and I stick to my guns by telling him I'm tired. (He takes it to mean I'm sleepy, but I'm actually overstimulated-tired.)

On Sunday mornings he expects to call me at 8 am and chat until at least 9 am before I get ready for church and stuff. Which is going on currently. There are times I just can't do this and I will just ignore the phone ringing. When he asks about it later I'll just lie (or not lie) and tell him I was dead asleep.

I have tried to explain things to him. "Sometimes I'm very tired and can't talk." But it doesn't seem to get things across to him.

Do you have a 'Block' function on your phone?  I suggest you use it.

The message is clearly not getting through to your friend, and they appear to be abusing your lack of assertiveness. Do you have someone else who could explain the situation to him like a shared friend?

Well we are actually pretty good friends other than his wanting to call me daily being a severe annoyance, so I don't wish to block his number.

^ Possibly

^^ ^ Good.

Once implemented, you will have accomplished 3 things:

1) His messages to you would likely be shorter.

2) You would be able to listen to him when and IF you choose to do so.

3) You would be able to respond to him when and IF you choose to do so.

If he objects to this treatment -- especially if he responds in anger -- then that is a MAJOR RED FLAG indicating toxic, stalkerish behavior.  At which point you would benefit greatly by cutting him off completely.

Just tell him you don't have the mental energy to carry on verbal conversations every day. Only call me once or twice a week at most as it's all I can handle. And then if he persists and calls daily, tell him once & only once if he continues you find it too disruptive and distressing to your life and you'll have no choice but to block his number so he can't call you. If he's respectful of you At All he'll understand and comply, if he isn't then he won't and you don't need someone like that causing you stress in your life.

One of my good friends that used to live in my neighbourhood, that I know is also mildly on the spectrum from his signs and symptoms, told me about 7 or 8 years ago that he doesn't like text messages or emails or messages of any kind because then he feels obligated to read and reply to them and it stresses him out. He prefers to be present and communicate with the people who are live in front of him only. So, I haven't sent him an email or any sort of message for 7 or 8 years. I only see him when he's visiting his parents place a couple blocks from me and I happen to see his vehicle there and swing by. Also, while neither has ever said it, I'm not stupid and comprehend that his partner doesn't particularly like me so that's another reason not to communicate and cause him relationship issues. But that's more like less than 5% and it's 95%+ that he flat out told me he doesn't like receiving any kind of text communications. If he has a phone number, I don't even know what it is. And just because he told me he doesn't want to receive text communications doesn't mean we're not friends - it just means he doesn't like them & I respect his wishes.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Give him a link to this thread.

Unless you want to completely block this person, you need to make yourself less available. You don't need to answer EVERY call, text, DM etc. We are all entitled to answer when we choose to on our own terms. You've already tried asking, and setting boundaries, etc. The only thing left is Choosing how you respond to this person and their behavior.

Good God almighty this friend is annoying me so much. Truth is, he annoys everyone. I'm just one of the only people who puts up with him.

I need to straight up tell him "I don't feel like talking right now", I guess. This morning I used the trick of telling him I needed to get a bath.... "Ok, I'll call you later"..... 15 minutes later...... back to back calls. Which I refused to answer until I was in a better headspace.

He doesn't have the mental capacity to realize what he's doing, truly.

Then tell him “I’m not feeling up to talking on the phone with anyone today. Send me a message next week and check in, maybe we’ll talk then.” Or something. Or more specific - msg/call in 5 days and see if I have the energy for it.

If he doesn’t have the mental capacity to understand then very clearly explain to what you want him to do and when. If he ignores your instructions, remind him once and hang up. Again again ? *block*

Edit: I guess you could be extra kind when he doesn’t follow your instruction and tell him “I like talking with you sometimes, but I told you I don’t have the energy to talk to anyone for a few days. If you call me again before the ___ date, I’ll be forced to block your number to protect my own mental health and well being.”

So then he knows flat out that that particular action will have that specific consequence and was warned so then you don’t have to feel bad one bit about doing it without warning etc.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

I need to do something. I am honestly coming to resent this guy.

Finally talked and said call me so many days a week instead of every day. It was received well, he mainly didn't want to damage our friendship