Alcohol addiction is ruining my life,

Post Reply New Topic

I started using alcohol to help make unmasking easier in my teens/early 20s. By my late 20s it was a problem. I would black out and behave like a psychopath. Then came the resulting shame and anxiety the next day. This continued into my early 30s. At 34 I started dating a guy who was a severe alcoholic. Watching him detox over and over ruined alcohol for me. Also his complete unreliability taught me about trust and how substance abuse ruins it. I quietly abstained at first and then we committed to abstaining together. After a bit we broke up but I wound up abstaining for over 3 years. I’m 43 now. I have a drink every now and then but my rule is no more than 2 and only on the weekend. I’m glad I spent the time getting used to functioning without it, particularly in times of stress or in large groups. Had someone told me in my twenties or early thirties that I should try living without alcohol, I would have laughed in their face. It was such a central part of my life and that needed undoing. But I know my situation is kind of unique in that it was only because of the alcoholic ruining it for me that I was able to quit. So my advice is to find an alcoholic to get in a relationship with… JUST KIDDING! Don’t do that, it’s awful. To be serious, I would find a tribe of people who do something other than drink. I started going to the gym more often and doing yoga. I spoke freely to others about my journey with alcohol and met many people that way. Online meetings or message boards are really great support too for when you’re trying to abstain. Best of luck to you!

Once you start drinking do you feel you cant stop Jamesy?

same

I have an unquenchable thirst and nothing will stop me except not taking the first drink. Good luck with your strategy!

My brother breaks up his drinks with diet coke

Maybe you could have a set time when you leave the pub

I had to come to the point where I was willing to try total abstinence from alcohol, and get involved in a support group to help me with that. I just celebrated 30 years of sobriety last month!

why are you feeling guilty?

I dont feel guilty for my drinking, I needed it at the time

Is that what you want?

Fair enough, Id like that too. Unfortunately id usually become angry!

Well at least try to cut down, you really should try to find a hobby outside of going to the pub. I mean I get it you have a routine or whatever but you could change it. I mean do you always really feel like you need the drink or are you just in the habit? and like you could drink less and look into if there are any hobbies you want to do, that could be a thing to distract you from going to the pub so often.

I mean like me and my boyfriend got to drinking too much but we are both working on cutting down. THat said you speak of drinking too many 3.5 beers, me and my boyfriend are drinking like 5.0 and sometimes 6.0 beers and getting carried away with that, so like a few 3.5 beers does not sound like a problem. Seems your main problem is you need some kind of hobby or activity outside the pub. Idk You could try and go for a run, get into bike riding, work on a minature project whether it is something motorized, for a table top game or just fun display item. Idk just does seem like you should find some actvity you like and maybe do that instead of the pub all the time.