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Astryd
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Joined: 27 Jun 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 4
Location: US

17 Aug 2023, 11:30 am

I have an intake assessment soon where I will discuss things. I should probably write things down but am using the forum to organize my thoughts. I have not experienced a visual hallucination or had auditory voices in over 4 years and probably 10 years or longer, however the few times I have experienced them I was on either Wellbutrin or another SSRI type medication. I am super-sensitive to noise, frequencies, light, etc. and I love people but dont experience it the same or Im different. I know that for several months I was in and out of episodes, and that was when I was a teen. I recently was diagnosed with a hormone disease PCOS high testosterone in women, and my blood has too much CO2 or carbon dioxide in it. I have a history of bucking the system and persuading others to join me. Had to be forced to conform in middle school and am just now learning how to use makeup.

Certain skills and instincts seem latent in me, while others seem very unbreakable. I get paranoid because I rationalize certain unexplainable things for rational reasons- but have such a broad spectrum/open mind to the possibilities that Im dismissed as irrational regardless of whether its psychotic delusional or speculative. Im not trying to justify or talk away the potential that I have a form of schizophrenia or bipolar or schiozoaffective or adhd or autism. But is it worth it to explore the idea that its just autism, and I dont need to be so medicated and have people control me so much out of fear that I will one day be unreachable, and how do I navigate these situations where family becomes overbearing out of fear and coercive like getting me to take injections instead of taking one pill a day or not considering stopping abilify and finding something else that works differently when there are other possible explanations and causes? Or maybe its both idk/does it matter?



blitzkrieg
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Joined: 8 Jun 2011
Age: 35
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Posts: 15,389
Location: United Kingdom

07 Sep 2023, 3:53 pm

Astryd wrote:
I have an intake assessment soon where I will discuss things. I should probably write things down but am using the forum to organize my thoughts. I have not experienced a visual hallucination or had auditory voices in over 4 years and probably 10 years or longer, however the few times I have experienced them I was on either Wellbutrin or another SSRI type medication. I am super-sensitive to noise, frequencies, light, etc. and I love people but dont experience it the same or Im different. I know that for several months I was in and out of episodes, and that was when I was a teen. I recently was diagnosed with a hormone disease PCOS high testosterone in women, and my blood has too much CO2 or carbon dioxide in it. I have a history of bucking the system and persuading others to join me. Had to be forced to conform in middle school and am just now learning how to use makeup.

Certain skills and instincts seem latent in me, while others seem very unbreakable. I get paranoid because I rationalize certain unexplainable things for rational reasons- but have such a broad spectrum/open mind to the possibilities that Im dismissed as irrational regardless of whether its psychotic delusional or speculative. Im not trying to justify or talk away the potential that I have a form of schizophrenia or bipolar or schiozoaffective or adhd or autism. But is it worth it to explore the idea that its just autism, and I dont need to be so medicated and have people control me so much out of fear that I will one day be unreachable, and how do I navigate these situations where family becomes overbearing out of fear and coercive like getting me to take injections instead of taking one pill a day or not considering stopping abilify and finding something else that works differently when there are other possible explanations and causes? Or maybe its both idk/does it matter?


Hi Astryd,

FYI, Wellbutrin is a "norepinephrine–dopamine reuptake inhibitor", it works on both norepinephrine and dopamine rather than serotonin. SSRI stands for "selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor".

Autism is often co-morbid with several other issues, including mood disorders, attentional disorders and schizophrenia spectrum disorders. So if you have any of those things as well as autism, and they have been diagnosed by medical professionals, then there is a chance that the medical professionals will be correct, or at least, close to the mark in terms of what you have been diagnosed with.

Being off of medications often makes a person lose insight into their mental problems and more inclined to believe there is nothing wrong with them. Sometimes medication can give a person insight and clarity of mind and a sense of what is normal.

On the flip side, medications can have many unpleasant side effects that can make a person want to stop taking them.

If your family seems to want you on injections instead of pills, it is likely your family believes you will stop taking the pills on your own accord, perhaps without informing them and they will likely also believe you are better off on the medication you describe.