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Jamesy
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18 Sep 2023, 8:25 am

When I was at the pub with some friends this guy who is 66 years old said to me out of the blue “You have black circles under your eyes and pale skin which at your age of 33 is quite disconcerting which means that you are tired”.

Do you think from a social point of view that is quite random and rude thing to say to someone? He said I had black circles a few months ago and I got angry with him but this time I just kept quiet and did not say anything back.



blitzkrieg
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18 Sep 2023, 8:26 am

Jamesy wrote:
When I was at the pub with some friends this guy who is 66 years old said to me out of the blue “You have black circles under your eyes and pale skin which at your age of 33 is quite disconcerting which means that you are tired”.

Do you think from a social point of view that is quite random and rude thing to say to someone? He said I had black circles a few months ago and I got angry with him but this time I just kept quiet and did not say anything back.


Perhaps he is well meaning & is trying to bring attention to a possible health issue?

Maybe he is being rude by accident?

It doesn't sound like something someone would say to be intentionally rude.



Jamesy
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18 Sep 2023, 8:29 am

What health issues can cause black circles and pale skin?



blitzkrieg
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18 Sep 2023, 8:35 am

Jamesy wrote:
What health issues can cause black circles and pale skin?


All kinds of things.

Diseases of the bowel, coeliac disease, salicylate sensitivity, sleep disorders such as sleep apnoea that deprive a person of restful sleep, a poor diet, and a bunch of other possibilities, too numerous to mention.



Jamesy
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18 Sep 2023, 8:36 am

blitzkrieg wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
What health issues can cause black circles and pale skin?


All kinds of things.

Diseases of the bowel, coeliac disease, salicylate sensitivity, sleep disorders such as sleep apnoea that deprive a person of restful sleep, a poor diet, and a bunch of other possibilities, too numerous to mention.



Guess I should be worried then? By BMI standards I am overweight but only about 6 pounds or so.



blitzkrieg
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18 Sep 2023, 8:39 am

Jamesy wrote:
blitzkrieg wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
What health issues can cause black circles and pale skin?


All kinds of things.

Diseases of the bowel, coeliac disease, salicylate sensitivity, sleep disorders such as sleep apnoea that deprive a person of restful sleep, a poor diet, and a bunch of other possibilities, too numerous to mention.



Guess I should be worried then


You could always try wearing tinted lenses indoors to hide black circles under your eyes.

I use dark glasses indoors for light sensitivity, but they have the added bonus of hiding my eye circles.



Jamesy
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18 Sep 2023, 8:42 am

blitzkrieg wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
blitzkrieg wrote:
Jamesy wrote:
What health issues can cause black circles and pale skin?


All kinds of things.

Diseases of the bowel, coeliac disease, salicylate sensitivity, sleep disorders such as sleep apnoea that deprive a person of restful sleep, a poor diet, and a bunch of other possibilities, too numerous to mention.



Guess I should be worried then


You could always try wearing tinted lenses indoors to hide black circles under your eyes.

I use dark glasses indoors for light sensitivity, but they have the added bonus of hiding my eye circles.



Could drinking beer on the weekend be causing my circles maybe?



naturalplastic
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18 Sep 2023, 8:47 am

Suggesting that you should go home and sleep instead being out drinking?

If you do have rings under your eyes and look plale...sounds like a legit thing to say.



blitzkrieg
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18 Sep 2023, 8:47 am

Alcoholism can definitely negatively affect your skin. I imagine it can cause black circles under the eyes, too.



Jamesy
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18 Sep 2023, 8:51 am

naturalplastic wrote:
Suggesting that you should go home and sleep instead being out drinking?

If you do have rings under your eyes and look plale...sounds like a legit thing to say.



I cant compromise my social just for the sake of cathing up on sleep



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18 Sep 2023, 10:54 am

Most often people that are younger do not spot or notice things that are big indicators of serious potential
health issues arising ..Whereas older people with experience , might offer a suggestion or a thought .
As to their experiences with similiar issues ...As their way of trying to be helpful.... Do not think the intent was to be rude, unless you have a history with the person previously of them being blatantly rude .
Had said the exact same thing to a long time but many years younger GF of mine.Who had those symptoms . After seeing her , for the first time , after not having seen her for 3 months , when she started a night job
As a Truck driver ....And she had started gaining weight considerably as well, and did share some info from someone else i know personally , whom did night work at a hospital,And said he had noticed all the younger women whom started night shift work also seemed to gain weight . Pretty sure her friends were not going to tell her .She went from heavey to morbidly obese dx within 6-8 months. After starting the job. Problem is , she is making more money than she ever made in her life which also has influenced her social stuff in a positive way. And she relies on regular Doctors to do her health care issues .
And Doctors want long term patients as money makers .
The issue is that the health issues caused by not doing self care , can cause all kinds of other less obvious more sneaky health issues in the future.. that can be hard to predict ..But will create their own form of serious health issues that either cannot be resolved . Or will hound her the rest of her life . And this is not meant to cause health anxiety.
But from repeated observations with other people as they age ,And from time as a nurse.( It just IS)
Pragmatically , it is a Cause and effect situation. Not a I Will take care of it later thing.
Sorry if I sound rude ...just being pragmatic,and sharing my observations and relaying experience. :roll:


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Summer_Twilight
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19 Sep 2023, 9:57 am

That wasn't rude but that honestly sounded more like condescending tone. See the problem with NTs today is that they assume that we are clueless about everything. Honestly, he could have said, "You look tired."



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19 Sep 2023, 10:19 am

That you should go home and get some sleep.


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Jamesy
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19 Sep 2023, 10:27 am

CockneyRebel wrote:
That you should go home and get some sleep.



I always look forward to go out and meeting people at the pub. The excitement the night before can make it harder for me to get a restful nights sleep.

Another possibility of course is that after having a fair few pints of beer I become dehydrated which makes my dark circles more obvious.