I stim with my hands and feet. I'm always touching myself in one way or another. I can't wear gloves or even put my hands in water because it blocks sensations. I can't wear socks or shoes (without going crazy), or even cover my bare feet with a blanket. Most of the time I'm touching my bare feet or playing with my toes. Sometimes for hours.
I play with my hair because it's very long. I grab a handful behind my head and twist it so it goes around my forearm several times. I hold it straight up in the air over my head. It's longer than my arm reaching upward. I twirl it. I feel for cowlicks. I trim the ends and brush them on my lips because they feel good that way.
I touch my face all the time. I was really bad at Covid rules for that reason and I can't wear makeup for that reason.
I do all of this in public (and more - but you mentioned fingers and hair), because I don't mask. I don't know how to mask and I don't want to learn. I have no filter in terms of impulsivity control. My body just does this stuff.
I also walk around with my arms out like an airplane. I twirl like a ballerina or do gymnastic poses.
Maybe I have Tourette's as well as ASD. I don't know.
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And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.
06 Nov 2023, 10:58 pm
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